Top Disney investor urges company to drop ‘Black Widow’ on streaming. Yes, give us that shit!

disney investor black widow streaming

A top Disney investor is totally tickling my balls with their latest plea. Bro wants the company to drop Black Widow on streaming, and it makes all the sense in the world to me. Why? Cause I fucking want it! But, also? Cause we have no idea when this shit is ending.

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‘Mulan’ is premiering on Disney+ on September 4 for $30. Is ‘Black Widow’ next?

mulan disney plus

Disney is finally throwing in the towel when it comes to Mulan dropping here in the states. Looking out at the flaming wreckage of our country amid COVID-19, the company has announced the movie will be dropping on Disney+ this September. It’ll run ya $30, which honestly ain’t that bad. I gotta wonder, if this shit works for them (and I imagine it will), will Black Widow follow suit in November?

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Disney+ has surpassed 50 million fucking subscribers in a mere 5 months. Baby Yoda and Captain America doing work!

disney+ 50 million subscribers

I say fucking goddamn, dudes. Disney+ has blasted past 50 million subscribers. In only five months.

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Disney CEO Bob Iger stepping down immediately and being replaced by longtime Disney exec Bob Chapek. Sure, whatever, okay?

disney ceo bob iger steps down

Apparently, Bob Iger is stepping down immediately as Disney CEO. Dude ain’t leaving, though. He’s staying on as executive chairman through 2021, and who really knows what any of these fucking wizards do.

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Disney has revealed the staggering list of all the content dropping Day One on its streaming service. And, goddamn, it’s overwhelming

disney+ every show movie

Disney ain’t just generating an overwhelming amount of original idiot-stew for its streaming service. Though, it’s certainly doing that. I mean, they have already announced an insane amount of upcoming content that appeals to the capes-and-lasers child in me. But additionally, they have revealed the almost suffocating amount of Day 1 Content.

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Obi-Wan Kenobi series on Disney+ takes place eight years after ‘Revenge of the Sith’ which is a lot of time for him to contemplate his fuck-ups

obi wan series timeline disney

That Obi-Wan Kenobi series that’s finally finally happening on Disney Plus? Motherfucker takes place eight years after Revenge of the Sith. I hope Kenobi has spent that time thinking about what a dick-head he was to Anakin, and flirting with Tusken raiders.

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Disney blocking Fox’s backlog from second runs at indie theaters. Not cool. Looks like I’m fucking pirating them Disney+ shows!

disney blocking fox backlog indie theaters

There’s a million reasons why Disney owning everything fucking sucks, man. But, here’s one you may not have considered. The company is blocking indie theaters from playing second runs of Fox movies. Which, at least around here, is a pretty big bummer. The OL Crew has more than once gone to an indie theater to catch a showing of something at a revival house. Fucking alas.

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Marvel reveals ‘Moon Knight’, ‘She-Hulk’ and ‘Ms. Marvel’ series for Disney Plus. Jesus Christ, slow downnnn

marvel moon knight she hulk ms marvel disney plus

Marvel has revealed three more series for Disney Plus. Moon KnightShe-Hulk, and Ms. Marvel. Like, all of these properties make me juiced. But? Too much content, dude. Too fucking much.

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Disney reveals plans for Marvel-themed park called “Avengers Campus” so we can all be adult children forever, great

avengers campus disney

I’m torn. On one hand, I really want to go to Avengers Campus. On the other hand? All this jerking off to Marvel and other pop culture has me feeling like we’re stuck in some sort of permanent adolescence. Eh, whatever. The Amazon is burning, you’ve never been closer to death. Go have fun.

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Here is every device Disney+ will stream on at launch. Like, no fucking Smart TVs tho?

disney plus streaming devices

Disney has dropped the last of devices that Disney+ will be available at launch. And, like. This is the essence of a first-world problem: it ain’t launching on any Smart TVs. The fuck?

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