Hey! You fucks! How are you all doing? During this week of Giving Thanks, amid the most rotten-ass year in memory? How are you all doing? During this week of a Blackest Friday, amid the most rotten-ass year of Fridays in memory? This guy? Truthfully, I’m fucking zonked, dude. My core feels hallowed out, and spread across the astral plane. I exist as a collection of core functions, shambling through the next couple of days. If I can make it to Thursday, I’m golden!
Then? On Thursday? I’m popping on a pair of joggers, pulling up a chair, and just fucking getting gluttonous. Consuming some Thanksgiving feast. Consuming some shitty movies with Bateman. Consuming some Spider-Man: Miles Morales.
I’m really just leaning into the concept of elastic waistbands and corpulence this week.
Tell me, what are your plans this week? Crushing some mashed potatoes? Crushing some Shadowlands? Crushing a backlog of comic books with your free time?
I want to know!
This is Monday Morning Commute, Thanksgiving Week Edition!
I was fearful that Cyberpunk 2077 wasn’t going to be long. And boy, does it appear those fears were unfounded. The motherfucker is clocking in at over 175 hours. Which is goddamn glorious, especially since it drops the last day of the semester for me.
A copy of ‘Super Mario Bros. 3’ just sold for $156,000. That’s a lot of fucking Junior Bacon Cheeseburgers!
Jesus fucking Christ! A copy of Super Marios Bros. 3 just sold for $156,000. The reason? The motherfucker has a rare box design. Uh. Okay. Like, on one hand this is fucking preposterous. But, on the other hand? If I had “fuck you” money, I would absolutely be embracing my nostalgia like this.
Man, I really need to watch The Witcher. This “Holiday Slay Ride” trailer has reminded me of this fact, dudes. I have to admit, I really fuck with how the show is willing to be silly, man. It’s a breath of fresh air in a pop culture where so many franchises are trying to be taken so seriously.
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Space! What cool fucking reveals do you have for us today? Oh! Jupiter’s moon Europa? It glows in the dark? Whelp, that is indeed fucking cool.
‘Black Panther 2’ is going to begin filming in July 2021 and Shuri may play more prominent role. Makes sense.
The capitalism juggernaut must ramble on, friends. Which means that Black Panther 2 will get made, and it’s going to begin filming in July of 2021. Ryan Coogler has the unenviable task of continuing on, in the wake of Chadwick Boseman’s passing. That said, I’m glad its that dude who is in charge of the production. How the fuck they going to address it all? Not sure. However, I think it makes sense to have Shuri take upon her brother’s mantle. I mean, right?
You know, it’s been a goddamn crazy week! To the point where I actually started a MMC with the same headline, and, whelp. That shit was flushed down the existentially quickness when the week hit warp speed. That said, I’m here now! How the fuck is everyone doing? Before we get going, a reminder. Check your pants for your genitals, check your wallet for a lucky dollar bill, and check your psyche for the few firing neurons left.
You back? You good? Your biological pump-and-chasm working? Lucky dollar in place? Brain tethered together with Insistence and Folly? Fucking good. Good! So, let’s hang the fuck out now! Given that we’re all in one place, secured, and seizing.
Deadpool was a fucking surprise, man. It was great! However, the sequel fell into all of Ryan Reynold’s worst, lazy tendencies. Woof! But, I have renewed hope for Deadpool 3, given that its script is being handled by Bob’s Burgers writers.
HBO has officially ordered ‘The Last of Us’ adaptation by dude behind ‘Chernobyl’ and the game’s director!
Well, it appears that HBO ain’t done ordering shit to series today! The’ve officially ordered The Last of Us to series, and I’m curious as fuck about this adaptation.
Fuck yes! We knew that Ava DuVernay was developing an adaption of DMZ for HBO Max. But, you know, Shit stands in development hell. Forever! Fucking forever! However, good news. This shit has officially been ordered to series.