#Video Games

‘The Callisto Protocol’ Gameplay Trailer: Oh this fucker is raw, huh?

I am fucking all-in on this spiritual successor to Dead Space, baby! Give me all the fucking gruesome environmental deaths and maiming. I fucking need thee, The Callisto Protocol.

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‘Final Fantasy XVI’ Producer Naoki Yoshida says the series is “struggling” and that acknowledgment is encouraging as fuck

final fantasy producer series struggling

I’ve been excited for Final Fantasy XVI since its first tease, and now I’m even more excited. In a recent interview, the latest installment’s producer has said the series is “struggling” to keep up with the times. That sort of candid and accurate assessment is exactly what I want from the dude helming the upcoming title. None of this fucking blowing smoke up our asses and pretending the series hasn’t been bumpy as fuck. Own the problems, and in doing so, begin to address them. Let’s go baby!

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‘John Wick’ director wants to make his ‘Ghost of Tsushima’ movie in Japanese. It’s fucking wild, I love it

john wick director ghost of tsushima movie japanese

The bro behind John Wick is making a Ghost of Tsushima movie and he wants to get wild with it. Wild with it how? Dude wants to make it in Japanese, with Japanese actors. Let’s fucking go for it, baby. Get nuts. Apparently Sony is backing the idea, too. For how long? Great fucking question. Like, I don’t think it’s going to fucking happen, but I appreciate the sentiment.

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Dude beat the $20,000 ‘Halo 2’ LASO deathless challenge. Motherfuckers are crazy.

halo 2 laso deathless challenge

A gamer who clearly has more skills in his perineum than I have in my whole body has completed the Halo 2 LASO deathless challenge. In doing so, motherfucker has claimed a $20,000 bounty that was issued for accomplishing this feat. What an outrageous amount of money! But, context is king. To claim this momentous combination of bragging rights and cash, dude had to complete the game on legendary. With all skulls turned on. Without dying. Jesus Christ.

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‘Halo Infinite’ Campaign Trailer: Microsoft Promises The Campaign Is Totally Real

Well, Microsoft decided to call our bluff. Those of us who really don’t believe Halo Infinite has a campaign. Fucking company dropped a trailer for it today! Fuckers. Seriously though, while I’ve always assumed it existed, I never had much faith in it being anything special. After the trailer today? Even more certain it’s going to be a big bag of whatever.

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Remastered ‘GTA Trilogy’ Trailer: Dropping November 11. If only I had the fucking time!

The GTA Trilogy has gotten itself a trailer and a release date, fuckers! The son of a bitch is dropping digitally on November 11, with a physical release to follow on December 7. Man, just ain’t no fucking time for this shit in my life. Just none at all. Too many cookies to eat, too many games in my backlog to play. That said, I think it looks pretty fucking solid, man. How about you? Heading back to Vice City? Do some blow, buy some clubs, bask in the neon glory? Fucking do it. Do it for me.

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PS5 is the first console to outsell the Nintendo Switch in almost three fucking years. Goddamn Nintendo’s got a juggernaut!

ps5 outsold nintendo switch september

The PS5 has done the seemingly fucking impossible, dudes. The console outsold the Nintendo Switch in September in the United States, breaking a 33-month stream.

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‘Grand Theft Auto’ Trilogy Remasters dropping this year to celebrate 20th Anniversary of ‘GTA III’

The Grand Theft Auto Trilogy definitive edition is dropping this year, which we sort of all expected. . But now it’s official, and your balls are unrestained. They may no longer hesitate. They can react to this official news. Plumpen? Shrink? Sway, side-to-side, apathetically? It’s up to you! Me? This guy? This trilogy remaster is cool in theory to me, but I’ll never get around to playing it.

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‘Diablo 4’ gets new game director in Joe Shely. Not even death can save this game! I hope I’m wrong.

diablo 4 new game director

Blizzard needs more drama like I need another diarrhea-filled road trip. But that’s life, baby! I’d say it’s karma, too, but that bullshit is in bullshit. The latest drama for the crumbling cadre of cockheads? Diablo 4 has a new game director. Hey! Why not? It’s been in development hell forever, and perhaps that’s where it is appropriately cursed to stay (I hope not).

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Konami dropping massive ‘Castlevania’ soundtrack boxset this December. Holy moly, she’s a thick bitch!

How much fucking Castlevania music can you handle, fuckers? Konami is hoping it’s a lot, hoping you can handle it straight up into your guts. The company is dropping a Castlevania boxset this December and it contains 26 goddamn volumes. Fucking 26!

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