NASA says the oceans of Jupiter’s moon Europa may be habitable. Wait, fucking what?

europa jupiter moon habitable

You know, with Reality on Fire, it’s easy to miss dope news like this. Check this shit out. The oceans of Jupiter’s moon Europa? May be fucking habitable.

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CERN has approved the plans for a $23 billion, 62-mile long super-collider. Study that Higgs boson, fellas!

cern new super collider 62 miles long

CERN has approved the plans for a new super-collider, friends. And this one? It’s fucking four times bigger than the existing one. 62 miles long! They’re getting ready to study that Higgs boson with even more fucking precision.

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NASA spacecraft so far away it sees stars at a new angle. Cosmic perspective, breh!

nasa new horizons so far away stars new angle

NASA’s New Horizons is fucking far away, folks. How far away? Well, I’ll tell ya! Especially if you didn’t read the headline. The motherfucker is so far away, its seeing stars at a different angle.

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Astronomers say they’ve found “dry lake beds” on Saturn’s moon Titan. Mystery solved, baby!

astronomers dry lake beds saturn titan

Astronomers have cracked a fucking code, folks. Mystery patches that have puzzled them for more than a decade on Saturn’s moon Titan have been revealed to be “dry lake beds” of hydrocarbon. Pretty fucking rad.

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Saturn’s moon Titan is drifting away quicker than expected. Bro, don’t go!

saturn moon titan drifting quicker

Saturn’s moon Titan is getting the fuck out of here, friends. We knew it was drifting away from Saturn, but scientists have found the fucker leaving 100 times faster than previously thought.

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Scientists have detected a green glow in Mars atmosphere. The Red Planet impresses!

scientists green glow mars

Scientists have confirmed what they have suspected for forty-years. The motherfucking Martian atmosphere has a green glow. Hell yeah, my dudes.

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Longest known comet tail stretched for over a billion kilometers! A fucking billion!

longest known comet tail billion kilometres

Man, space is fucking huge. Incomprehensibly so. The latest example? This comet tail, which stretched for over a billion kilometers. Insane.

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Mars may have once had rings, according to new research. The Red Planet fucking rocks, dudes

mars rings research

Oh fucking hell! Mars has a goddamn monopoly on awesomeness in our solar system (though, granted, Jupiter is amazing, so is Saturn, okay, they’re all rad). Apparently, the son of a bitch may have once had rings.

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SpaceX Crew Dragon capsule has successfully docked with the International Space Station. Three cheers for privatizing space!

spacex dock international space station

I’m pretty fucking stoked that SpaceX successfully launched its rocket, and docked with the ISS. At the same time, I’m bummed that it’s going to be Musk and a bunch of billionaire dickheads that colonize the Microsoft Galaxy and Planet Starbucks.

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Space Swoon: Hubble captures a gorgeous tapestry of thousands of stars. Fucking universe, man!

hubble tapestry of stars

Here’s a little batch of cosmic glory for you motherfuckers, on this Friday. It’s a gorgeous tapestry taken by the Hubble Space Telescope, and captures thousands of stars. I said, thousands!

Hit the jump for the full glory and details!

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