Jesus fucking Christ, Grant Theft Auto V has sold more than 80 million copies. The title ain’t ever stopping. Nope. Not until GTA VI, and I’m fine with that. I loved the game, and these days I love watching people roleplay in GTA Online on Twitch. Yeah, yeah…I don’t know what that says about me-us-humanity, but whatever.
Official trailer for Far Cry 5 is here folks, and *I* am *stoked* to the brim. I love the series, I love the idea of taking on religious militias in the United States, and I love being chased by bears. A…a perfect union.
Xbox’s attempt at building an internal gaming-Netflix is being rolled out on the first of June. Or! Right now, if you have Xbox Live Gold. The company has also now revealed, right off the motherfucking jump, that it will be offering 100 games.
Ubisoft has dropped some new Far Cry 5 artwork, and announced when the game shall be revealed in earnest, in a tweet. I cannot fucking wait.
Rick and Morty. Awesome, niche television show and comic book. Firewatch. Awesome, niche video game. Why not have an installment of the former, from the minds of the latter? There ain’t no damn reason, why not!
Just today. Just. Fucking. Today. I was talking to friend of the site (and fellow garbage lord) Jerkface about how Red Dead Redemption 2 was dropping so soon! So damn soon. My arrogance and assuredness has resulted in the Universe punishing me. And unfortunately everyone else.
I’m so fucking ready for some more Far Cry. So yeah, breh, you can imagine my geek glands fully torqued over here for this Far Cry 5 teaser trailer.
I and four hundred thousand of my closest strangers huddled in front of our computer screens, anxiously awaiting the reveal of a “brand new experience” that had been hyped beyond belief. While grandiose claims and clever commercials are pretty much a staple for large title releases these days, this was the first time I had been so personally affected given just how much I have been invested in the original game. To establish some context, over the last three years I have spent 2,310 hours actively playing Destiny. I have completed over 309 raids, including 242 hard raids (where you can’t be revived if you die). The real number is considerably higher, but the game only records the first time you’ve completed each raid on each character each week, so it’s missing all the raids I’ve done for no loot to help someone else. I have played 4,158 PvP matches in the Crucible, where I have killed 47,166 guardians and been killed 49,662 times. Oh, and I am the 400th ranked Sparrow Racer in the entire world. *flex* Basically, while other adults are out under that burning sky-ball thingy in the company of other human beings, I am playing Destiny.
Man, people loved Life is Strange. I never played that shit, because I’m a Trash Lord who spends his time grinding repetitive quests in sandbox games as a means to exert control over his own life. However, that don’t mean I don’t wish I hadn’t played the game. (Look at that fucking disgusting sentence, LOOK AT IT.) Anyways, none the less, none-the-less, nonetheless, there’s a sequel to the fan favorite in development.
Bungie has blown the roof out with its Destiny 2 reveal, dropping all sorts of delicious morsels. The game is coming to Battle.net for the PC! It’s going to feature matchmaking! Weapon sets are changed! Check it out here.