Monday Morning Commute: Repossess Your Mind

FUCK IT

Monday! Monday! Monday! Here in the Armpit of the Internet. The Space-Ship Omega. Air recyclers busted. Stuck in a orbit around Io, praying for the tug-ship to come in with replacement thrusters. Ain’t got nothing to do but fuck one another, wax poetic about existence, and drink whatever stock of cheap synthetic whiskey we can find. Empty your pockets and pull down your trousers, we’re going to make the best of it.

Oh. Oh Yeah. And in case you didn’t know, this is MondayMorningCommute, the column where we share what we’re up to this week.

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‘The Hunger Games: Mockingjay’ Trailer: Katniss rages against the machine

Catnip

Catnip Evergreen and Gail Force Wind are all up in this trailer for The Hungry Games: Mockingbird. Shooting down planes and shit. I’m down. I’m diggin’ it. Vibin’. Bein’ a choad.

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‘Avengers: Age of Ultron’ gets (unsurprising) plot synopsis

AGE OF ULTRON

Are you like me? Hungry for any morsel of Avengers: Age of Ultron news? Well, here. Gobble up this official plot synopsis from Disney. It’s pretty much everything the Internet has already figured out, but it makes for a momentary indulgence.

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‘Saints Row’ creative director peacing out for Valve

saints row iv

Saints Row is losing its creative director. Irreverent, offensive, Smarted Dumb Game In The Room. Saints Row is like me in video game form. And I imagine a lot of the game’s vibe is due to Jaros, the aforementioned director.

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No Sh*t Rumor: Obi-Wan getting standalone ‘Star Wars’ flick

Obi-Wan.

In what is apparently a *rumor*, but what strikes me as *no fucking shit*, there’s murmurings that Obi-Wan is getting his own standalone movie. Like, this is obvious, right?

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Cosplay: Batman finds love with a Supergirl

Happy-Man

Batman needs to cheer up. Some would say he needs *therapy* (cough go to our store, buy things, cough). So god bless this cosplay, which has him finding a momentary respite with Supergirl.

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Oculus Rift consumer version arriving by summer 2015

Oculus Rift.

The Virtual Reality Distracticaust which promises to finally fully sublimate thinking in the name of all-consuming virtual distraction is coming, folks! I suppose you can tell my anxieties regarding the Oculus Rift, whose consumer version is due to arrive by next summer.

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DC Comics ‘Teen Titans’ TV series may hit TNT

Nightwing.

I think Teen Titans is probably the DC franchise I know the least about. Outside of that Adam Warren jam from a few years ago. So I’m pretty agnostic about the news that DC may be bringing the franchise to TNT. At the very least it’ll apparently start my Batman, Dick Grayson.

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‘Episode VII’ adds Jar Jar Abrams pal Greg Grunberg

Greg

I don’t know why, but I’m just going to call him Jar Jar Abrams until he proves himself otherwise. Do I think he will? YES. Is that going to get in the way of me calling him such until the first trailer comes out and BLOWS OFF MY TITS? NO. Said Jar Jar has added one of his total BFFs to the cast of Episode VII.

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‘Grand Theft Auto 5′ hitting XB1 & PS4 on Nov 18. PC, uh, next year

Grand Theft Auto V

Grand Theft Auto 5 is one of the releases I’m anticipating most this Fall for Gen8 consoles. Such is the state of the console generation at this point. Remasters and third-party titles not exclusive to this generation. But let me stop myself, lest I complain too much. Because I am very excited for this title, which I never got to play last year. Read the rest of this entry »