Weekend Open Bar: the turtles were on to something

weekend open bar the turtles were on to something

Welcome to Weekend Open Bar, my friends!

I’m not dead, not sad, just busy these days my friend! That said, I apologize! How the fucking fuck have you fucking folks been? Me? I feel eerily content. Not euphoric which is rare, not happy which is fleeting, but generally content. I can’t explain it. Or, rather, I suppose I can. Teaching is fantastic, my diet is good, I’m getting a lot of sleep and exercise, and by god, I swear it, yoga fucking works.

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Sony planning ‘Silk’ as another ‘Spider-Man’ spin-off movie. Like, bros, launch one successfully first!

silk spider man spin off movie

I’m down for a Silk movie, if it’s done competently. But, let’s be honest. There’s no real reason to fucking think Sony can launch a successful Spider-Man spin-off movie until proven otherwise.

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Bethesda sues ‘Westworld’ game creators alleging it steals ‘Fallout Shelter’ code. Why not, the show steals everything else!

fallout shelter bethesda westworld

Real talk! I don’t think Westworld is very good! So, I’m using this moment to take a cheap shot at it. I apologize. This news, though? Bethesda is alleging that the makers of the Westworld game rips-off Fallout Shelter assets.

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Space Swoon: Jupiter’s gorgeously chaotic clouds captured by Juno

jupiter chaotic clouds juno

Juno out there, doing work. Capturing gorgeous images of Jupiter. This time, it’s of the planet’s gorgeously chaotic clouds.

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‘Atlanta’ and ‘This Is America’ director Hiro Murai is helming the sci-fi movie ‘Man Alive’ and I’m torqued

this is america atlanta hiro murai man alive

Hiro Murai is objectively fucking awesome. Between Atlanta, This Is America, and his work on Barry, he’s more than wormed his way into my heart. But, he’s about to push deeper into it. Dude is doing a fucking sci-fi- movie.

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Jodie Foster in talks to join FX’s ‘Y: The Last Man’ in starring role. This shit feels more and more real

y the last man jodie foster

A good portion of me is refusing to believe that this Y: The Last Man adaptation is going to happen. That said, fucking news like this is challenging that portion more and more.

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‘Ozark’ Season 2 Trailer: A New String of Terrible Choices Arrive on August 31, 2018

Mars has a dust storm so big it is encircling the entire fucking planet!

mars curiosity dust storm

I say goddamn, does Mars ever have a dust storm. In fact, the motherfucker has grown so big that its encircling the entire Red Planet.

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Disney’s plan to acquire Fox is back on after they up their offer to $70 fucking billion

disney fox deal back on

Okay, okay, fellow MCU losers. We can untie our balls, unfill our asses, our sacrifices to the curiously erotic Gods of Pop Culture have been heard. Disney has sweetened its offer to acquire Fox’s film and television assets, and the deal is back on.

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‘Star Wars’ spin-off movies put on hold as Lucasfilm stunningly appears to get a fucking clue

star wars lucasfilm film spin off movies on hold

Man, I really, really liked Solo. But, none the less I am thrilled at the news that Lucasfilm has put their Star Wars spin-off movies on hold. It’s hard to deny that the franchise is going to be better for it in the long run. Countless Star Wars fans have been crying for new adventures in the increasingly claustrophobic Galaxy Far, Far Away. And after Solo financially flopping, it appears Lucasfilm is finally hearing the message.

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