Monday Morning Commute: Doom’s Day
I met Kevin Feige once.
It was at a Red Robin, y’know the restaurant with the greasy burgers and tight-lipped waitstaff who don’t care if y’bring a little bourbon to sneak into your milkshake as long as y’don’t tell the manager when y’catch `em bumpin’ lines in the bathroom?
Yeah, that’s right, my favorite restaurant.
Anyways, I was drooling onto my Cajun-fries and preparing to send my boyfriend a breakup text for the fifth time that month — yeah, we were havin’ some serious problems — when I looked up to see the baseball-hat-wearin’-Marvel-Man himself. He was in a booth, a big booth, y’know, with a woman too sexy to be his wife but too classy to be an escort.
I saw this as my chance, so I bolted from my booth, jus’ a little tiny one, y’know, and I practically hopped over the bottle-blonde and sat nearly on Kevin’s lap. I asked if he’d like to hear my pitch for an MCU movie and when he said “No,” well, I knew he was playin’ hard to get. So anyways I launched into my pitch which saw Ben Grimm and Reed Richards livin’ in a post-apocalyptic vision of the Future Foundation’s ruins and they just go about their day doin’ normal apocalypse stuff like foraging for canned goods and stayin’ out of the sun, but without doin’ any superheroic shit. Sue’s dead and Johnny’s dead and eventually we find out that Franklin’s hooked on smack, so some of the movie, maybe even a half-hour, is just Reed cradling his dopesick son while Ben weeps in the corner.
“Real art house shit! Cannes! Sundance! TIFF” I kept shoutin’!
Anyways, I got to meet Kevin Feige and I thought I heard him say that he’d visit me in jail but the officer dragging me away was real rude, y’know, and wouldn’t let me go back into the Red Robin to double-check.
So, I don’t know, maybe’s it’s gonna be launched with Phase 5, but I’m really excited for Doom’s Day.
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I’d apologize for that, but something tells me you either aren’t offended by my nonsense or you never even check it out.
So what’re we doing now, you ask? Well, we’re diving into the Monday Morning Commute, even though it’s the afternoon!
I’ll show off some of the stuff I’m diggin’ into this week, and you hit up the comments section to do the same! It’s pop culture cross-pollination at its finest!
Huzzah!
‘Lucy in the Sky’ Trailer: Portman and Hawley get trippy in their trip to space and back
A new trailer for Noah Hawley’s first cinematic directorial debut, Lucy In The Sky! And, I ain’t fucking watching it! I saw the first one, was immediately sold on Hawley goodness, and now I’m keeping myself pure. Pure! I must be pure!
Designers want to give 3D printers legs and let them wander the Earth. Horrifying. Sublime.

Designers want to give 3D printers legs, and let them wander the motherfucking Earth. I’m all in on this insanity. This would let them fill in asphalt, create artificial coral reefs, and other bonkers shit. Honestly? It’s so cool, and so forward-thinking that it’ll never happen in this Hellscape Reality. But, we can dream!
‘Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker’ D23 Trailer: Your Journey Nears Its End
Let the speculation, excitement, and grousing begin! It’s the latest trailer for a Star Wars property? Me? C’mon. I’m the local Star Wars mark. Can’t wait.
‘Black Widow’ and ‘The Falcon and Winter Soldier’ get posters at D23. But Disney doesn’t officially release them because fuck us

I don’t get why Disney and other companies don’t just give the public official versions of shit they drop at conventions. Case in point: here are a couple of cell phone snaps of posters for Black Widow and The Falcon and Winter Soldier. Is the quality good? Of course not. Is everyone going to fucking see them? Of course. So, why not just give us them. Fuck.
After the jump because they’re potato.
James Gunn’s ‘Suicide Squad’ movie casts Nathan Fillion so all you nerds can start jizzing

Nathan Fillion is joining Suicide Squad 2 or whatever! Oh wee! I can’t tell where my disdain for Fillion comes from. Is it from him? Or, is it from the countless nerds his characters have inspired to think they’re witty, when they’re actually insufferable? I think probably the latter.
‘El Camino: A Breaking Bad Movie’ Trailer: Skinny Pete ain’t snitching on Jesse, yo!
Yesterday, Netflix dropped a trailer for the Breaking Bad movie! Nice! It dropped following the leaking of the movie’s title.
I’m ready for this shit! How about you?
‘Breaking Bad’ movie is called ‘El Camino’ and follows Jesse on the run. Pump this into my fucking soul!

Whoops! Motherfucking Netflix accidentally leaked the title and plot of the Breaking Bad movie! Titled El Camino, it is going to follow Pinkman on the fucking run. I need this shit. Now.
Kit Harington joins ‘The Eternals’ cast as Black Knight and I know nothing about this fucking dude

I know pretty much absolutely fuck-all about The Eternals. Thus, it shouldn’t be a surprise when I tell ya I have no idea about Black Knight. However, I do know Kit Harington. The stone-faced mopey dude from Game of Thrones. Never really been impressed with dude’s chops. But, the rest of the cast is so fucking stacked that I don’t really fret this casting.
Watch: Check out this timelapse of the Milky Way with the sky held motionless and the Earth rotating
Here’s some existential glory for your Saturday. It’s a timelapse by Aryeh Nirenbergof the Milky Way with the sky held motionless and the Earth rotating.. Soothing, comforting, daunting. I love it.




