Cosplay: ARCHER Brings The Sexy and the Suave
I haven’t watched much of Archer, enjoying what little I have caught. It’s ridiculous, and well…I mean, c’mon. This shit hole is nothing if not an effort in an absurdity. So kudos to these chaps for bringing some Archer heat, and of course double-kudos for the cute women involved. ‘Cause let’s be honest, that’s the staple of my consistent cosplay boner.
Hit the jump for more pics.
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‘THIS IS 40’ TRAILER: Judd Apatow Is All, LOL WE GET OLD.
The trailer for Judd Apatow’s sort-of sequel to Knocked Up has dropped and it’s pretty meh. Pretty fucking easy jokes about hitting the midlife, peppered in with some occasional amusement. I’m hoping the Red Band trailer will hold the genuine funnies.
The ATMS In Vatican City Speak LATIN. Baller Status.
Ha! I knew that everyone who mocked me for taking Latin back in the day was wrong. Dead language, my ass! All I need to do is take a trip to the throbbing crotch center of Catholic power to wield my Latin as I withdraw money. The same money that I will obviously be using to buy a sick replica of the Pope’s silly ass hat.
MYSTERIO Is The Villain For Marvel’s ‘SPIDER-MEN’. Pshaw, Miles Got This.
Marvel wants you to know the villain that’ll have Miles Morales and Peter Parker joining together for one vicious Spider team. Or rather as I see it: the villain that Morales is going to have to save Parker’s dumb ass from. Mysterio! Boom!
Strange Moments in Solid Movies: Red Beard, Bringer of Pain and Painkillers
Akira Kurosawa’s Red Beard is a work of profound humanism, so much so that its titular character is generous enough to give center stage to those around him who really need it: the broken, the destitute, the disenchanted, and the dying. As overseer of everything in his medical facility in 19th century Edo (now Tokyo) for its impoverished citizens, the red-bearded Dr. KyojÅ Niide (ToshirÅ Mifune) observes what each inhabitant (staff and patients alike) requires to get better. Some need medication; others need meditation, as the past can weigh on the sick as much as present maladies. And a will to live–something that the poor could hardly fathom previously–can be more important for the less fortunate than fortuitous health. Although the events of the film undoubtedly revolve around Red Beard, it is his acquiescent disposition and charitable openness toward revolution (both narratively speaking and even in some ways subtly social) that give everyone else a chance to shine. These other characters–coming and going, improving and dying–are allotted a fair chance in the world for once; they are given liberty, which allows them to find some peace and comfort–true health, in any state.
‘CHRONICLE’ Director Developing ‘FANTASTIC FOUR’ Reboot. Not…Directing?
Chronicle was a jointy-jam of a flicky-flick this year. It had everything you need in a movie: enjoyment, fun, special effects. Since seeing the movie I’ve been advocating for everyone involved with it to make oodles of money doing whatever they wanted. Namely movies and pornography. It seems my voiciferious nature has paid off, since the director is now doing Fantastic Four. In some capacity.
‘PLAYSTATION ALL-STARS: BATTLE ROYALE’ TRAILER: Super Smash Rip-Off Time.
Sony has finally dropped footage of its Super Smash Bros. equivalent, and it is all the derivation you could ever ask for. The only problem I’m having is that I give much, much, much less fuckz about the Sony brand than I do my Nintendo-powered childhood.
Hit the jump for the trailer.
FOLLOW US FRIDAY: Thor’s Love Gun Demands It
Hello foolish friends. It’s Friday, and that means several things. First off I’ll be eating my weight in pizza. Later on in the evening I’ll spend it cursing my eating habits and burning asshole. Before either of those lovely moments however, I’m going to implore you to glom onto the Spaceship Omega in the various fashion. The Book of Faces. The Twitterererer. Be Tumblin’ with us. But mere clicking moments for you, infinite gratification for me and my forthcoming quivering bowels. I love you.
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WATCH: Hire Batman For A Birthday Party, Get A Serious F**king Downer
I get it Bruce, I get it. You’re an unhappy dude. Your parents were mowed down by some junkie and at some point your dumb ass fell into a well or some shit. There’s no need to be rolling up to a child’s birthday party and spraying your malaise all over them. Or spraying anything all over them, for that matter. Cheer up.
Internet Privacy-Destroying CISPA BILL Passes House. Batten Down.
CISPA prevails! As a collective community we must have blown every ounce of protester-load we had getting SOPA nailed into a casket, cause we sure as shit ain’t doing much about CISPA. It’s like SOPA on steroids, has the back acne to prove it, and once slept with your Mom. No kissing, no phone call the day after.
