‘The Dragon Prince’ is new animated series from ‘Avatar: The Last Airbender’ writer and ‘Uncharted’ game director

the dragon prince avatar writer uncharted

Jesus fucking Christ, am I ever stoked for this new Netflix animated series. I mean, it’s being birthed into this flesh-place by a Last Airbender writer and an Uncharted game director.

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‘Black Widow’ movie officially being directed by Cate Shortland, who I don’t really know

black widow movie cate shortland director

The Black Widow movie is finally happening, and it has a director. Cate Shortland.

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‘RoboCop’ being rebooted by Neill Blomkamp and the original writers. I can fuck with this!

robocop neill blomkamp original writers

RoboCop being rebooted? Ehh. But wait, it’s being directed by Neill Blomkamp? Hmm. And better yet, the original writers are involved? Well, sign me the fuck up!

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‘Joker’ origin movie starring Joaquin Phoenix officially fucking happening. LOL, K!

joaquin phoenix joker origin movie

Maybe this movie will be fucking awesome. Maybe it won’t be. But, I ain’t giving DC the benefit of the doubt until they string together two movies that don’t huff fucking sun-baked bowls of diarrhea.

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Billy Dee Williams officially returning as Lando Calrissian in ‘Episode IX’ and the new trilogy just got so damn smooth

billy dee williams star wars episode ix lando

It was rumored, and now it’s official. Billy Dee Williams is back as Lando in Episode IX, motherfuckers!

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Netflix reveals ‘Castlevania’ season 2 ain’t dropping until October. The wait to mirk Dracula lengthens

castlevania season 2 october

Man! Not only was the first season of Castlevania short as fuck, but the wait for the second season is equally as long.

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‘John Wick: Parabellum’ is the official title of the third ‘John Wick’ movie. Prepare for war, fuckers!

john wick 3 john wick parabellum

Confusingly, John Wick: Chapter Three will not be the title of the movie following John Wick: Chapter Two. Instead, the motherfucker is titled John Wick: Parabellum. I don’t give a fuck about the odd inconsistency, though. Movie could be called John Wick: Donkey Day Care and I’d still be frothing at the mouth to see it.

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‘Star Wars: Episode IX’ casts Keri Russell in “action-heavy” role. Mara Jade or GTFO, my dudes

star wars episode ix keri russell

Keri Russell is going to to be in Episode IX, my dudes. And, I’m going to riot if she ain’t Mara Jade.

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Idris Elba is the villain in the ‘Fast and Furious’ spin-off starring The Rock and Statham. MOTY confirmed!

idris elba fast and furious spin off villain

How do you force me to get even more torqued about The Rock’s Fast and Furious spin-off? Push my purple-headed priapism to previously inconceivable heights? Cast Idris Elba as the villain.

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Space Swoon: Behold Jupiter’s glorious southern hemisphere!

jupiter nasa southern hemisphere kevin m gill

Check out Jupiter’s meaty southern hemisphere! I don’t know, there’s probably a better, more puerile pun, but it’s hot out and I’m tired.

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