Some astronomers believe Jupiter is flinging comets into the solar system. Not stopping them. What the fuck, bro!

jupiter comets earth

Jupiter! For years, I operated under the idea that it protected the Earth from comets. That was the consensus! Fuck! However, some astronomers now believe it may be doing the exact opposite.

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Jupiter has new Texas-sized storm around its South Pole. Don’t ever stop being wild, my dude!

Jupiter! Ain’t ever gonna stop with its massive, existentially nauseating-sized storms. It’s got itself a new one near its South Pole!

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Space Swoon: NASA’s Juno captures Jupiter as it glances back. Look back at it, look back at it!

juno spacecraft jupiter

NASA’s Juno spacecraft caught this gorgeous image of Jupiter! It was taken as the spacecraft sped away from the big gaseous bastard, and provides a look at its southern hemisphere.

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Space Swoon: NASA’s Juno spacecraft caught gorgeous photo of Jupiter solar eclipse

juno jupiter io eclipse

Hell yeah! You want some photos of a solar eclipse on Jupiter? Well, motherfucker, you’re in the right place. NASA’s Juno spacecraft snapped these photos during a fly-by, and we’re all the richer for it.

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Five of Jupiter’s newly discovered moons got names! Meet Pandia, Ersa, Eirene, Philophrosyne and Eupheme!

jupiter five moons names

Five of Jupiter’s twelve newly discovered moons got themselves names!

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NASA confirms its mission to Jupiter’s moon Europa to hunt for signs of life. Go, go, go!

nasa jupiter europa

NASA has confirmed it’s going to Jupiter’s moon Europa, folks. Launching a sumbitch up into the Cosmos to hunt for life. Expected launch date? Somewhere between 2033 and 2035.

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Jupiter had something seriously huge smash into it on Wednesday. The Cosmos don’t give a shit about us!

jupiter big slammed

I’ve long known that Jupiter serves as a bulwark for the rest of the solar system. Eating some tremendously large objects to protect the rest of it. Whelp, Wednesday night? Something seriously huge smashed into the planet. This all, you know, underscores the importance of getting humans spread across the solar system. Diversify our asses for when Earth inevitably takes one right off the chin.

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NASA shares gorgeous image of Jupiter’s Great Red Spot that Hubble snapped this past June

hubble jupiter great red spot

Question: Can there be too many pictures of Jupiter’s Great Red Spot? Answer: fuckingĀ of course not.

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Space Swoon: Jupiter’s gorgeous clouds captured by Juno for our benefit

jupiter clouds juno

Goddamn glorious picture right here of Jupiter’s clouds. Props to you, Juno!

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Jupiter’s Moon Europa got the right kinda of water to support life. So. Well. You got that shit or not, Europa?

jupiter europa water life

Jupiter’s Moon Europa got that salty water underneath its surface. Which, apparently, is the right kind of water to support life. Like, nice! Now, let’s see if it actually has it.

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