#February2019

‘Episode IX’ wraps shooting and J.J. Abrams announces it with cast photo. I got all the damn feels, dudes

episode ix wraps shooting photo

Hey! It’s me! The last man on the planet (okay, aside from Rendar, Neo, Jerkface, and Bateman, I guess) stoked for Episode IX. And as the last man stoked, this picture hits me right in the groinal-feels.

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‘Episode IX’ leaked image drops new looks at returning characters, plus some newbies too

episode ix leaked image

Want a look at some Episode IX mofuckahs? Well, you’ve come to the right place. Honestly, nothing too spoilery, unless you consider anything Episode IX-related to be so.

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Maybe: The ‘Star Wars: Episode IX’ title has leaked. Let the speculation begin!

star wars balance of the force episode ix

Yeah, I don’t know. This is a nothing post, based off of rumor! But, I think the leak is probably real. And, I like speculating about one of my favorite things in the known Cosmos: Star Wars. I’m posting this shit after the jump, in case you don’t want it spoiled.

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‘Episode IX’ takes place one-year after ‘The Last Jedi’, as confirmed by John Boyega

episode ix one year after last jedi

Episode IX will take place one year after The Last Jedi. It’ll be released two years after The Last Jedi. And, I’m imagining, it’ll be years too early for those still smarting over the divisive flick. Me? I can’t fucking wait.

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‘Star Wars: Episode IX’ casts Matt Smith in mystery role. Just make him Grand Admiral Thrawn or some shit

episode ix matt smith doctor who

One of those Doctor Who fucks has joined Episode IX. Yeah! It’s the one with the bow-tie or some shit! Seriously though, he looks Grand Admiral Thrawn as fuck. Dare to dream.

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‘Star Wars: Episode IX’ casts ‘Lost’ alum Dominic Monaghan in mystery role, obviously.

episode ix dominic monaghan

Dominic Monaghan is joining the Mystery Box In A Galaxy Far, Far Away, my friends! The actor will be reunited with Abrams, with whom he worked on Lost.

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Billy Dee Williams officially returning as Lando Calrissian in ‘Episode IX’ and the new trilogy just got so damn smooth

billy dee williams star wars episode ix lando

It was rumored, and now it’s official. Billy Dee Williams is back as Lando in Episode IX, motherfuckers!

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‘Star Wars: Episode IX’ casts Keri Russell in “action-heavy” role. Mara Jade or GTFO, my dudes

star wars episode ix keri russell

Keri Russell is going to to be in Episode IX, my dudes. And, I’m going to riot if she ain’t Mara Jade.

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John Williams is pretty much done with ‘Star Wars’ after ‘Episode IX’

john williams done with star wars episode ix

John Williams sounds like a dude who is up and fucking done with Star Wars, after Episode IX. Hard to blame the dude, who has been involved with the franchise for forty-plus years.

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J.J. Abrams says ‘Episode IX’ has a script and will begin filming in July

jj abrams episode ix script shooting july

J.J. Abrams got himself a fucking Herculean task with Episode IX. He needs to appease those Star Wars fans who hated Episode VIII. He needs to acknowledge the criticisms of his own Episode VII. One of the major stars of the movie passed away, sending the entire original script(s) into Hell. And not only that, but he has to wrap-up a saga in just one film following a movie that pretty much kicked over the entire fucking sandbox.

But! At least he has a script.

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