#April2021

‘Celeste’ Developer Teases Next Game ‘Earthblade’ With A “Vibe Reveal” and What The Fuck Are We Saying?

celeste developer teases next game earthblade vibe reveal

What the fuck is a vibe reveal? I only ask because apparently that’s what the developer of Celeste has done for their next game, Earthblade. I’m getting fucking old, nothing makes sense. My balls hang lower, and the young ones’ slang evades me. I don’t know! I don’t know about my place in this Universe. However, I do know that I’m fucking stoked for Earthblade, given that Celeste fucking owns. Even if a vibe reveal has me feeling ancient.

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Weekend Open Bar: Dusk, Of A Summer Evening

weekend open dusk of a summer evening

We’re getting deep into summer now, friends. With such a progression brings deeper, more rewarding dusk. However, it also brings with it shorter days, longer shadows, and hints at a Fall which promises to be seemingly chaotic at best. But as I said Monday, in the end we’re promised nothing. Nothing! Fucking nothing at all. Which means I might as well enjoy the beautiful dusks and the welcoming evenings while I can, no? Who knows what next week will bring for me. Really, for all of us. Why sweat it? And if we’re not sweating next week, let us definitely not begin to contemplate whatever the fuck is about to happen this winter.

Instead, let’s fucking hang out this weekend! Balls out in the air. Toes in the existential pool. Let’s fucking hang out, here at the Open Bar!

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Monday Morning Commute: Good News

monday morning commute good news

What’s up, my friends? I must confess I’ve been staring at an empty text box for the past ten minutes. Trying to come up with something more gripping than “what’s up friends?” – but here we are. Just a poorly caffeinated dude (way below my usual levels, but I’m working on it), wanting to hang out. With ya’ll! The fellow occupants of the sovereign state known as Space-ship Omega!

We’re into the second actual, full, meaty week of the year. The holidays receding into memory, though not without subtle reminders. For me? The tightness in my waistbands, the billing statements stacking up. And with that infinite recession comes the reality that, oh fuck, there ain’t any respite arriving any time soon.

However! That’s what we have the art & farts & sharts for! To serve as a balm for the existential soul, helping us to get through the grind. And, wouldn’t you fucking know it! This here Monday Morning Commute serves as a community to communicate the various things we’re enjoying, and looking forward to, in a given week.

I’ll go first! ‘Cause, you know, I’m writing the motherfucking thing.

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Weekend Open Bar: Hoth by any other name!

weekend open hoth by any other name

Mother. Fucking. Yes! It’s the Weekend, friends! Kick off your pants, pick up your preferred drink, and get your ass around the hearth! This is the latest edition of the Open Bar! And man, it feels good to be here. Why? Cause, it’s the last fucking Weekend of the semester, baby! As well, it’s been a long, dark, cold, snow-filled week!

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Long Weekend Open Bar: Eternal Thanks to JCVD for this Mini-Vacation!

weekend open bar eternal thanks

Eternal thanks to JCVD, I’ve fucking made it to this mini vacation. Thanksgiving to the Man Himself, you know? I woke up this morning on the start of my Long Weekend, and, fuck. I actually slept well. It’s amazing how glorious emerging from a deep slumber is, especially when there’s no alarm clock awakening you. I hope you’re as fortunate enough as me to be embarking on your own mini-vacation.

And if so, I hope you’ll spend some time during it here at the Open Bar.

Sharing what you’re going to be doing amid this temporary Oasis. Eating so much you gotta pop your top button? Catching-up on Watchmen, or sweating The Mandalorian? Rock fighting the elderly for a PS4 Pro bundle on Black Friday? I want to know!

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