Lizzy Caplan is joining the ‘Gambit’ movie which is apparently really happening now?
Lizzy Caplan is joining the Gambit movie? For real? Man, I used to really dig her back in the day. Full-on crush during Party Down‘s run. Then, she sort if disappeared from my radar. But if she’s starring in the movie, I’m even more excited about this movie. Which, I guess I should specify isn’t saying much, because I keep forgetting it even exists. Whatfuckingever, dude.
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Weekend Open Bar: Live Fat! Die Full! It’s The Only Way!
Hello, friends! It’s Weekend Open Bar! Pull a chair up to the hearth. Summon your favorite chemicals from the servo-droid behind the counter. Pop off your pants, oh, I know, they’re a bit tight from this week’s corpulence. And relax! Just straight-up fucking relax with me. Your co-host, your champion, your spirit-guide. Let us move together through a miasma of revelry, consumption, contemplation, and companionship.
What are you up to this weekend, comrades? Shoving any old ladies out of the way for a discounted blender at TarMart? Catching up on any stories on the TeleVisor? Trying to rationalize the utter depravity that is your diet these past few days?
‘Chappelle’s Show’ co-creator Neal Brennan is developing a late-night show, not a moment too soon
Lost in the brilliance of Dave Chappelle and Chappelle’s Show is the fact that the classic was co-created by Neal Brennan. Dude fucking rules, and now he’s bringing a late-night show into the world.
‘Captain Marvel’ casts Jude Law as its male lead. Well, dude finally gets a comic book movie
Jude Law was sweating being in a Watchmen movie back in the day, but that didn’t happen. Zack Snyder had other designs, like shitting on the property before turning his destructive eyes towards the DCU proper. However, now Law is finally getting into the capes-and-lasers game.
‘The Incredibles 2’ Teaser Trailer: Jack-Jack Has Powers. Lots Of Them.
Perhaps heretical to state this, but I do not give one single, solitary, morsel-esque fuck about The Incredibles 2. That said, maybe you do! And should you, here’s a trailer for it!
Monday Morning Commute: A Holiday Special On Ennui!
How’s it going, folks? Are you segueing into Corpulence Season well? You must prepare to fulfill your duty as a member of the Empire!
Consumption! Things! Stuff! Food! Consumption! Consumption! Consumption!
Hail, Hail, Hail!
Toe the line! Nay, stand in line! You must be checking out mentally while checking out virtually, physically! The form doesn’t matter, only the consumption! The filling and emptying of stomachs, shopping carts, bank accounts, guts, shelves, savings.
Consumption! Things! Stuff! Food! Consumption! Consumption! Consumption!
That’s a negative spin on the whole ordeal, isn’t it?
SNES Saturdays #4 – Bateman Used To Bang Pillows
So like yeah, Bateman confesses to banging pillows when he was an adolescent. We also, you know, suck. And if that isn’t enough, we contemplate the disgusting nature of Donkey Kong’s Candy Kong, and other such garbage.
‘Star Wars: The Last Jedi’ TV Spot: Rey Makes Big Promises To Luke
New TV spot for The Last Jedi! I haven’t watched it, ain’t gonna watch it, but if you’re inclined…watch it!
Jake Gyllenhaal rumored to replace Affleck as Batman. Don’t tease me, bro
Rumor has Jake Gyllenhaal as the dude eyed to replace Ben Affleck, should the actor drop the mantle. Like, this is fantastic, and I want it. Gyllenhaal is similar Ben Affleck, except talented, better looking, and ostensibly wouldn’t hate the role with every fiber of his being. Still not convinced? Go watch Nightcrawler and Prisoners and then get the fuck out of my faceee.
Views From The Space-Ship: make trash edible again
Woah! Oh! Shit! Woah oh shit shit oh woah! It’s Desktop Thursdays! I’m currently: burning the fuck out of my mouth, trying to house some chili. I’m currently: supposed to be on my way to the gym. I’m currently: typing this up in a hurry, so I can finish the aforementioned two other activities! It’s Desktop Thursdays! Check out my world(s), and then share your own!
