‘CAPTAIN AMERICA’ Sequel Announced For April 2014.
Provided that the world doesn’t end in December (it’s going to, fuck science and fuck you too), Marvel is going to continue churning out installments of the comic-book-movie-industrial-complex. Hope you’re not sick of the flicks, cause they’re lined up for years, and years, and years. The latest joint to get an official sequel release date is Captain America: Fucking Silly Poses.
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‘THE DARK KNIGHT RISES’ Audio Outtakes Have Morgan Freeman Confused As F**k
Okay, these aren’t legitimate outtakes from The Dark Knight Rises, but they’re amusing the balls out of me. Particularly awesome: Morgan Freeman not understanding that Batman and Bruce Wayne are the same people.
Hit the jump for them.
‘TO ROME WITH LOVE’ TRAILER: A Woody for Italy. Get It?
The trailer for the next Woody Allen joint (he’s calling them that now) has dropped, and I’m embracing it with arms wide open. If I’m being more specific, I’m trying to embrace Penelope Cruz’ character from the trailer, but I’m not sure I can wrap myself around her…glory. Oh yeah, the rest of the movie looks pretty jazzy, too.
Hit the jump to check it out.
First Look: CORTANA From ‘HALO 4’, Or: BLUE JUBJUBS.
Game Informer is going to be rolling out a Halo 4 rub-and-tug this month, and they’ve dropped the cover ahead of time. It features franchise fixture Cortana looking all sorts of blue and seductive.
Hit the jump to check her out.
‘AVATAR’ Producer Says Sequel Isn’t Likely To Make 2014 Release Date. 4D NOT YET MASTERED.
The sequels for Avatar was supposed to start dropping on our futile simian brains starting in 2014. They would herald the unfurling of the fourth dimension in cinema, and allow James Cameron to ride a pile of baby corpses all the way to his secret base on Mars. The problem with mastering the 4D is that it takes some time, and it appears that Avatar 2: I See You Ethnographic Stare is going to be a smidge late.
‘MASS EFFECT 3: EXTENDED CUT’ Is FREE DLC Due This Summer
Right after I comment on the fact that Jennifer Hale hasn’t dropped any lines as Commander Shepard for future Mass Effect 3 content comes this BioWare statement about the “new” ending that has been promised.
THIS WEEK ON Eastbound & Down – Chapter 19
Mother of Satan! EB&D takes the family circus to levels never before unseen, in what ends up more of an anthropologic character experience than an actual plot-progressing episode. I get it though. Not bitchin. I still believe. This week each vice is tidily accounted for, one by one, as we examine the true inner-workings of a southern dysfunctional family the likes of which produced such greatness that is, K fucking P.
‘BORDERLANDS 2’ PREVIEW SCREENS Blow Out!
Well fuck! Maybe I don’t get invited to go play Borderlands 2 like all the fancy websites did. Forget “maybe”, I fucking didn’t. What I did get to do was collate all the glorious pictures from the various sources into one post for our amusement. Let us hold one another, being neither privileged nor deprieved. The eroding middle class of gaming. Yes, I don’t know what the fuck I am saying.
Hit the jump for the goods.
Views From The Space-Ship: Spring Has Sprung, So Watch Your Eyes
Let’s hit campus together, you fucks! Make some gifs! Here in the latest edition of Views From The Space-Ship!
Commander Shepard Hasn’t Recorded Any New ‘MASS EFFECT 3’ Dialogue. For Now.
BioWare has promised the groaning, miserable legions of Mass Effect 3 detractors a new ending. What they haven’t promised is a release date for this new ending, or told them what the ending would contain. As well, if there’s going to anything with Shepard in this new ending, one of the voice actors isn’t any wiser than we are about it.
