All hands on deck!

It appears that Spaceship Omega has inadvertently veered off course. Somehow, perhaps because Navigator Burton fell asleep after drinking too many Pepsi-and-gasoline cocktails, we have slipped into a pocket of spacetime usually avoided at all costs. That’s right, folks, batten down the hatches and brace yourselves! We’re headed right for it!

The beginning of the workweek!

As wave after wave of ennui, minutiae, and stress wash over us, we can rest assured. For every passenger of Spaceship Omega has a spot in the refuge known as the MONDAY MORNING COMMUTE! What is this sanctuary, you ask? Well, this is where I take the time to show you the various bits of entertainment and mind-drivel I’ll be using to survive the onslaught of real-world responsibilities. Then, you hit up the comments section and tell us which floatation device you’ll be clinging to when your ass is tossed into the Ocean of Obligation.

Yes, beneath the half-baked metaphors and bleeding-heart-on-my-sleeve hyperbole, it’s folks tryin’ to point one another in the direction of cool shit.

Oh no! Another wave! Let’s do this!

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Oh boy. (Oh boy x infinity.) Get it while the video is up, Imma be in bed. Dreaming of this flick, coated in love and violence.

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Nintendo has revealed the controller for the Wii U. You know, the actual  controller. Much like their tablet-monstrosity smacks of an iPad, their “pro” controller looks like a repainted Xbox 360 controller. I can’t complain too much however, since the source they’re ninjaing is the best controller on the market.

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Yup.

Budrickton, Slacker in the North, First of His Name.

(some more specific thoughts from this otherwise straightforward-but-incredible spectacle to be rolled into a season-end post this week!  Finalé’s tonight at 9pm on HBO, and it’s clockin’ in at 64 minutes!  Adjust thy PVRs, and enjoy!)

Stuxnet was a worm that ran pillaging through the computer mainframe things of Iran’s nuclear enrichment facilities. Surprising no one!, it turns out that the son of a bitch as issued by none other than Dr. Swag Nasty Obama (my own nickname for him) and in conjunction with Israel.

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Earlier this week it was reported that Sony was trying to snuggle into the loins of a couple of cloud-based gaming services. If this report is to believed, the lucky dude whose dong Sony is going to tug is none other than Gaikai. What could this mean?!

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I’ve read before about the gnarly collision that is destined between our own home galaxy and that sliding son of a bitch Andromeda. Unfit to let our eventual collision be left as a burden on other homo-martian-neptunians, NASA astronomers have decided to let the world know.

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Yo! Fuck Monday. That’s so far away. The lid has been blown off Gears of War: Bro Hugs Through Cuffs today, and in a world with no patience that is exactly how we’ll have it.

Hit the jump for the Game Informer  covers.

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Christina Applegate is back! She will be reprising her role as Veronica Corningstone in Anchorman 2: The Quest for More Money.

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I put hot sauce on everything. To those unaccustomed to eating with me, the sight must be unseemly. There I am, happy as can be. I sit, content in the slathering of  Sriracha onto everything. As the meal progresses, the hot sauce begins to dominate my porky fleshy husk. My eyes being to water, my nose is running.  Intermittently  as I sweat profusely, I will sniffle up snot goblets sliding on their  mucousy  bellies out of my nose and down my face before sallying forth. Dinner is a battle. I’m fine with this. At least no longer will it be a battle to weaponize my food.

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