#Video Games
CONFIRMED: ‘BLACK OPS 2’, Plus Release Date Leak.
Not the way I’m sure they wanted the information to come out, but here is confirmation of Black Ops 2.
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‘SKYRIM’ Files Reveal ‘SNOW ELF PRINCE’, And Crossbows. Give Us The F**King DLC.
Listen, Skyrim. I need your fucking DLC yesterday. Here’s hoping these files that were dredged up are confirmation that you’re coming soon. Otherwise I’m going to stab you with ice-hardened tits.
Black Cat from ‘AMAZING SPIDER-MAN’ game tickles my latex spot.
Black Cat is going to be all up in the Amazing Spider-Man video game and it appears the creators have learned from Arkham City. Slap a babe in some latex and watch as dorks like me suffer the dribbly-tip. Also, this dame is way hotter than either MJ or Gwen Stacy. Hit it Parker, hit it furiously.
‘PLAYSTATION ALL-STARS: BATTLE ROYALE’ TRAILER: Super Smash Rip-Off Time.
Sony has finally dropped footage of its Super Smash Bros. equivalent, and it is all the derivation you could ever ask for. The only problem I’m having is that I give much, much, much less fuckz about the Sony brand than I do my Nintendo-powered childhood.
Hit the jump for the trailer.
The ‘WII U’ And ‘3DS’ Getting Downloadable Games. OH SHIT, Welcome to 2007.
Nintendo and Apple have to be hanging out, stroking each other’s hog. They’re both masters of announcing shit like it’s something innovative and ass-tingling despite having already been done. In this case, Nintendo is all, “Hey, you can download New Super Mario Bros. 2 this summer!” and mentioning the Wii U will support it as well. Yeah, whatever. Passe!
LISTEN: Melodies Of ‘MASS EFFECT 3’ In One Gorgeous Rendition
Whatever you want to say about Mass Effect 3, I think its safe to say it featured some gorgeous music. Especially Clint Mansell’s haunting piano score, which for some reason was horribly underused. Singer Malukah has taken that jam along with other melodies and turned it into a goosey-bumpy song. Fitting tribute to 99% of an awesome game.
WATCH: MIT Wizards Hack Electrical Grid, Play TETRIS On A Building.
Oh, those wizards at MIT. You have to love them, for they can do things that simply make my ass ache. I spend my days jacking it and posting articles for you, my friends. They hack electrical grids and play Tetris on buildings.
Hit the jump to behold.
Rumor: Leaked ‘BLACK OPS 2’ SCREENSHOTS Featuring The Quadrotor
These may or may not be leaked Black Ops 2 screenshots, featuring in-game looks at the title’s quadrotor machine of death.
‘RESIDENT EVIL’ Creator Bringing SURVIVAL HORROR To Bethesda. Cyeah!
Shinji Mikami created Resident Evil and a shitload of other shit, but don’t let that give you the impression he is sitting on his ass. No fucking way! Creators create. After dominating pretty much everything ever in the world the dude is rolling up more survival horror goodness on Bethesda’s dime.
The Dude’s High 5s: Top 5 Misunderstood Videogame Henchmen
So last week I shat in the pool and started pointing fingers. I get it, some of you were unhappy with my High 5. I’m gonna let you in on a little secret, that’s how I like it. This is a melting pot of ideas and opinions.
This week we’re moving into the realm of video games; a realm that I have disgracefully ignored until now. Today it’s about henchmen, specifically the waves and waves of baddies that you as the protagonist dispatch without hesitation. These aren’t the run of the mill bad guys. Perhaps these guys don’t quite deserve the hurting that you put on them. Maybe next time you encounter them, you’ll think a little more and just let them pass.
