#Comic Books
The Old Spice Guy Campaigns To Play Luke Cage. I’m Not Sold, Are You?
It seems that Isaiah Mustafa has gone full Sean Young on us and is campaigning to be Luke Cage. There’s a short teaser he, and some other mysterious and undefined powers that be, have cut. Hit the jump for the trailer and my take on the entire thing.
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Monday Morning Commute: memory-ill day
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Broadcasting from Omega Station Monstar on this most glorious of three-day weekends, I present MONDAY MORNING COMMUTE! This weekly post is my excuse to show off the various ways I’ll be entertaining myself through the workweek. After you read about how I’m going tranquilize my desires to scream “BURN IT DOWN!” while crashing an ice cream truck into the post office, you should then hit up the comments section and tell me what you’re up to.
If I don’t have new things to do, there’s a strong chance the mail’s going to be late this week.
Rumor: ‘The Avengers’ To Feature ANOTHER Villain?
There’s a rumor going around of another villain in the Avengers movie. One we haven’t spat about yet, and who frankly, would be a fucking righteous threat for a sequel or so. Spoilers ahead, fuckos.
Variant Covers: Xombis Ate My Neighbors!
Ride me with! We have ourselves a rootin’ tootin’ motherfucking pull list to spit about. This is Variant Covers, the weekly column where us of the nerd predilection spout off the comic books we’re snagging tomorrow.
After a hiatus last week in which I graded final exams, wrote my own bullshit papers, and generally wept at the Sky Gods for forging such an unfavorable existence, I’m stoked to be back. There is a good goddamn backlog of comics I haven’t gotten to, and I’m using the semester break to tear gleefully into the ass of my Stack’o’Funnies. I’m coming for you, Detective Comics, Cowboy Ninja Viking Vol. 2, Black Hole, and hopefully others.
But this week, let’s gab about this week.
Face of a Franchise: Betty Ross
[face of a franchise presents two individuals that’ve fulfilled the same role. your task — choose the better of the two and defend your choice in the rancor pit that is the comments section]
The Incredible Hulk is one of the most venerated comics characters of all-time, and rightfully so. In one way or another, can’t we all sympathize with the plight of Bruce Banner? A repressed weakling, Banner occasionally allows his frustrations to get the best of him. And when they do, the dude turns into a giant green rage-monster and starts beating the shit out of everything in sight.
Maybe the guy just needs to get laid.
So who’s Banner’s lady of choice? Well it’s Betty Ross, daughter of arch-nemesis General Thaddeus Ross (oh, how naughty!). While countless artists have penciled Betty over the years, she’s most recently been portrayed by two smokin’ Hollywood babes.
In 2003’s Hulk, Betty Ross was played by Jennifer Connelly. The movie was a damn disaster (a movie based on the Hulk should never try to be a psychological thriller) but Connelly was damn gorgeous. Truthfully, I can’t really recall how her acting was in the flick, but she won an Academy Award for her role in Crazy Math-Guy so I’ll assume she rocked.
About five years later, Liv Tyler took the reins for The Incredible Hulk. Tyler, having proven her worth as a half-elf, was more than ready to play Banner’s beauty. This movie was definitely a step in the right direction, and I think it’s fair to give Steven Tyler’s daughter some of the credit.
So, who’s the real Betty Ross? Jennifer Connelly or Liv Tyler?
Official Photo Of Tom Hardy As Bane From ‘The Dark Knight Rises.’ Fap. Fap Hard.
Warner Bros. has released their first official image from ‘The Dark Knight Rises’ and it’s of Tom Hardy as Bane. My erection is so hard that my vision is swimming. The actual image is pretty cool, but what it all suggests though quite obvious – that this movie is fucking real and actually happening – has me losing my shit.
Hit the jump for the official image.
Boat Load of ‘X-Men: First Class’ Promo Pictures; Bras and Mutants.
The world of ‘X-Men: First Class’, where January Jones lounges in a gorgeous bra and panties, and every dude dresses the way you wish you did. I can’t wait.
Hit the jump for a shit load of pictures.
Monday Morning Commute: Future Ghostings
To all space-babies and planet-dwellers tuning in – welcome. Thanks for making OL your choice in the galaxy’s foodcourt of edible debris. Tonight’s special is the charbroiled mindrot, served with a side of over-enthused nerdgasm. Make sure you wash it down with an ice-cold beer.
This here is the MONDAY MORNING COMMUTE, the weekly joint in which I lay out all of the puddles of escapism I’ll be soaking up. Inspired, you then hit up the comments section and do the same. In the ideal universe, the MMC is the chillout tent we use to avoid the burden of the workweek. So c’mon, let’s dance.
‘Wonder Woman’ TV Show Is Dead, Go Figure!
Go fucking figure! The abortion known as the ‘Wonder Woman’ pilot has been officially axed. It makes sense considering there wasn’t a day of filming that wasn’t ridiculed and smash-fucked by the fanboys all over the internet. Like me!
Batman Gets His Ass Laid Out On The Vegas Strip. Oh, Culture.
Oh, Batman. Every once in a while you take the death of your parents all too hard. You drink the night away, set the Bat-Plane to Las Vegas, and wake up in a puddle of your own vomit and coke-nose-snot-blood. That clearly has to be what is behind this video. Or, you’re some creepy dude dressed up in a Batman suit who fucked with the wrong dude in the sunbaked desert clime of Vegas, and suffered a debilitating fucking suplex of power and horror.
Hit the jump to watch Batman get fucking owned.
