Michael Shannon has been cast as General Zod in Zack Snyder’s Superman flick, which has been given the official title, “Man of Steel.”

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This is  PRESS START!, and it’s a glorious afternoon here on the Eastern seaboard. It’s sunny out, go squeeze your love! Drink some suds. Disconnect. We’re going to do this quickly, I got myself a  barbecue  to attend! So with alacrity, we’re going to blow through some of the bullshit in the gaming world which caught my eyes this weekend. Per usual, hit me with your own observations.

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#1: Yakuza Is The Official Franchise Of Japanese Porno Babes.
Sega’s Yakuza franchise is a booming source for saucy Japanese babes to either parlay their porn careers into video game success, or now, use a video game as a launching ground for porn. Makes sense?  Erena Aihara was totally in Yakuza 4. Then recently she decided that she would use that particular opportunity to get her porn on.

That would be neat enough, but as you may know, another lady in Japanese porn, has been in the Yakuza series as well. Rio! Oh Rio. Star of such films as “Squirting Young Wife and Let’s Have Sex at School.”

You’re in  quality company, Aihara.

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#2: The Commodore 64 Fucking Lives!
Hit the fucking wayback machine! Classic gaming system the Commodore 64 lives again! It has been repurposed. Modified. Upgraded. Changed, though slightly the same. I hope to have something similar happen to me after the sparkling lights go out within my meat husk. Turn me into a robot, or a crash test dummy, or a remote controlled bomb diffuser or some shit. I must live, though my consciousness has been left to trip the light fantastic.

Though not as dope as my scenarios, the Commodore 64 has been given new life as a computer. Inside the swank keyboard is something with a little bit of thrust.

PCWorld:

The new system, which also starts at $595, is a little more modern: it’s got a Dual Core 525 Atom processor, an Nvidia Ion2 graphics chipset, 2GB of RAM (upgradeable to 4GB), a 160GB hard drive, and built-in Wi-Fi. On the left side of the keyboard there’s a slot or tray-load DVD (upgradeable to Blu-ray), and on the right side there’s a multi-format card reader, along with a USB 2.0 port. The rear features four additional USB 2.0 ports; mouse and keyboard PS/2 ports; DVI, VGA, and HDMI ports; Ethernet; and support for 6-channel HD audio. It runs Linux, but you can install Windows if you like.

It lives again. Not too shabby, though again, it’s not a human body turned into a remote controlled bomb diffusing device. What can you do.

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#3: Anonymous Throws Down With Sony.
Say what you will about their antics, Anonymous taking it to Sony this week is worth mentioning. The nameless legion decided that it was time to inter-fuck Sony’s servers for their persecution of Geohot and other hackers. The result was a deep beating of the PlayStation Network servers, leading to a number of errors and other bullshittery. Later on in the week they suspended their attacks because of it affecting dudes who just wanted to throw hadoukens and rock killstreaks.

Peoples within Sony talked some junk about the cyber-attack, describing it as nothing more that “annoyed…[their] network engineers”, and were planning to wait out the attack until Anonymous got bored. That tactic makes sense to me, though you’re probably going to draw their ire again by belittling the assault.

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[WEEKEND OPEN BAR: The one-stop ramble-about-anything weekend post at OL. Comment on the topic at hand. Tell us how drunk you are. Describe a comic you bought. This is your chance to bring the party.]

Words were launched, attacks salvo’d over the week when Anonymous decided they want to throw down with Sony. By now, you must have your dome piece fiercely ensconced in the sand-pipes to not know the swagger of these dudes. And dudettes? I assume there has to be some females.

Anyways, I’ve always dug on Anonymous. As I’ve written in prior posts, maybe it’s the teenage petulant FUCK THE MAN in me. Read an article and you’ll see the juvenility bleeding through my fingers into poorly edited (like this one is assured to be) ramblings of an over-caffeinated douchebag.

Mea culpa.

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I am by no means a PlayStation admirer. So if you think I’m wanking on this article because of fanboy preference, ain’t true son. Ain’t true at all. What am I a fan of is Corporation Cock Measuring, Console Clashes, and Dudes Talking Shit. I own every system, I go where my favorite titles migrate, and truthfully? I’m a bit of an Xbox fanboy.

Still though. Sony PlayStation CEO Jack Tretton came out recently in Fortune spitting diamond Word Bullets at Nintendo and Microsoft, and I dug roughly 30% of what he was saying.

Let’s take a look!

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Enlarge. | Via.

That vague picture above is a poor rendition of something that is probably beyond the comprehension of our fat simian grey matter. It’s a black hole literally tearing apart a star.

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Motherfucker  Freedan the Eternal over at Gamefaqs has been so kind as to drop some details from the Mass Effect 3 in the newest issue of Game Informer. Where the fuck is my copy of this shit? Today was the first time I checked my mailbox eagerly in goddamn years.

Hit the jump for the details shared!

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Oh shit! Here’s some fucking Batnews up on your Friday tits.  Josh Pence has been cast in ‘The Dark Knight Rises’ to star in flashback sequences. The most significant part? He’s playing a younger version of someone we’ve already met in the movies.

Spoilers ahead, boyos.

Hit the jump!

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[face of a franchise presents two individuals that’ve fulfilled the same role. your task — choose the better of the two and defend your choice in the rancor pit that is the comments section]

In my humble opinion, Saturday Night Live has had two periods that can both accurately described as classic – the late `70s and the early `90s. Both of these eras stand out because their respective casts were absolutely stacked, filled to the brim with a wealth of members whose individuals talents rocked but whose combined efforts fucking murdered. I mean that in a good way. And yet, even with such commendable collaboration, both casts had a fan-favorite.

From 1975 to 1979, John Belushi explored comedic territories on SNL that have barely been ventured into since. Belushi was the epitome of what it meant to push sketch comedy to the limit. Sure, he could do impressions and characters, but he’d also go on emphatic tirades and put his body on the line in the name of his art. Before his time on Spaceship Earth was up, he’d immortalize himself not only as an original SNL cast member, but also as the star of Animal House and one half of the Blues Brothers.

However, Generation X had their very own SNL fat-guy. Perhaps even more winsome as his predecessor, Chris Farley was beamed into the homes of millions every week. Not only did he make us gut-bust, but he also inspired us to feel good. Yelling into the camera, falling through tables, warming our hearts with a smile, Farley possessed that intangible comedy attribute. While he undoubtedly stole the show with features such as Tommy Boy and Black Sheep, the man proved his worth as a supporting player with Billy Madison and Dirty Work.

I know this week’s dilemma is a little different. And truthfully, I don’t think I can decide. So it’s up to you.

Who’s better – John Belushi or Chris Farley?

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Here’s the uncomfortable truth: time travel is real. It has to be. It is the only reason I can think of that China would pull off what they did recently. Motherfuckers banned time-travel movies and television.

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Oh hell yeah! The Mass Effect-related Dope Train continues chugging along today. Hot on the heels of the news that there’s going to be a Mass Effect anime, Game Informer drops the cover to their next issue. Mass Effect 3, motherfuckers! Which means of course, there’s going to be a goddamn blowout in the issue. It promises to have “12 pages of exclusive info, screens, and art that no Mass Effect fan should miss.”

You bet your fucking ass I won’t.

Hit the jump for the full cover.

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