#April2011
Creator of the Video Game Cartridge Has Died. Salute.
Jerry Lawson passed away. This is the man who helped create the video game cartridge, and if this isn’t enough to make him awesome in your eyes, I shame you! With thumbs bitten and farts in your direction!
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Nic Cage’s Copy of ‘Action Comics’ #1 Recovered, In Cage Fashion.
After a decade of being separated, Nic Cage has been reunited with his copy of Action Comics #1. Like every other story in the world surrounding this Living Deity, the story is full of madness, and a glorious quote by Cage himself.
Sony and Geohot Settle Out of Court. Sell-Out!
Listen man! When you’re riding high, you’re willing to run the fucking gaunlet! Geohot stunted back when he first released the PS3 rootkey and Sony was pissed off. He wasn’t going to accept anything aside from some apology from Sony. However, Sony has subsequently released the robo-ninjas, Geohot fled to South America, and now he’s singing a different tune.
Check Out Green Lantern’s Suit In Three High-Res Pics.
Warner has released three new pictures of Ryan Reynolds or uh, the CGI equivalent of him rocking the Green Lantern suit. It looks as considerably chintzy as the Wondercon footage looked dope. As in the footage was cool, and these look lame.
The Wachowskis And Tom Hanks Team-Up For ‘Cloud Atlas.’
I’m probably alone on this, but I fucking miss The Wachowskis. Sure, the Matrix sequels were heartbreaking, but they essentially made V for Vendetta, and I thought Speed Racer was fucked-up, absurd madness. A sugary mindfuck that seems like a progenitor to Scott Pilgrim.
So I’m pretty stoked at the news that they’ll be teaming up with Tom Hanks for ‘Cloud Atlas.’
Monday Morning Commute: One Life at a Time
Dark days have descended upon the workweek. Just as the work continues to pile up, I come home feeling fatigued. Although a nap provides momentary refuge, when I return to fight the beast I find it just as formidable but ten times as pissed off. I forge ahead, knowing that that at the end of this five-day torture rack, I will fumble, exhausted and smiling, into a week-long vacation.
Don’t think I’m complainin’ – I know that most jobs don’t include occasional weeks off. But rest assured, my weeks off and relatively low wages are now considered by many the real problem with the nation’s budget. Yeah, it’s totally not the million-dollar missiles we’re hurling at countries whose conflicts we have no reason to get involved in.
Shit. I’m grandstanding. Back to the point. Welcome to the Monday Morning Commute, the spot where I show you what I’m doing this week. If all goes to plan, you then get so excited that you hit up the comments and share YOUR plans. Give’n’take, get it?
Lezrokk.
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Rockin’/The Parallax: Hypersleep Dialogues
BTBAM’s new EP drops tomorrow and I couldn’t be more excited. Okay, to be fair, I downloaded the leak last week, but there’s something about actually purchasing a CD that gets me fuggin’ amped. Artwork?! JEWEL CASE?! Wait, A DIGI-PACK!?!? OH SHIT!
Anyways, this three-song, thirty-minute release is goddamn dense. I’ve listened to it the full way through more than a few times, and I hear new bits every damn time. I think bassist Dan Briggs deserves mad respect – his parts fit cohesively into the audio canvas, but are kooky and insane when you listen for them.
This shit is like Bitches Brew for a new generation.
Images & Words – Orc Stain #6
[images & words is the comic book pick-of-the-week at OL. equal parts review and diatribe, the post highlights the most memorable/infuriating/entertaining book released that wednesday]
The fact that Orc Stain is written, drawn, and colored solely by James Stokoe is fucking ridiculous, a wonder that should be put on the same level as the creation of penicillin. What’s that, you’re wondering why I’m spouting such hyperbole? Well, the simple fact is that in addition to having the most imaginative plot I’ve come across in eons, this book’s visuals are absolutely jaw-dropping.
Orc Stain is comic book dynamite.
Michael Shannon Cast As Zod In Snyder’s Superman Movie, ‘Man of Steel.’
Michael Shannon has been cast as General Zod in Zack Snyder’s Superman flick, which has been given the official title, “Man of Steel.”
Press Start!: Porn Stars and Gold Farmers!
This is PRESS START!, and it’s a glorious afternoon here on the Eastern seaboard. It’s sunny out, go squeeze your love! Drink some suds. Disconnect. We’re going to do this quickly, I got myself a barbecue to attend! So with alacrity, we’re going to blow through some of the bullshit in the gaming world which caught my eyes this weekend. Per usual, hit me with your own observations.
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#1: Yakuza Is The Official Franchise Of Japanese Porno Babes.
Sega’s Yakuza franchise is a booming source for saucy Japanese babes to either parlay their porn careers into video game success, or now, use a video game as a launching ground for porn. Makes sense? Erena Aihara was totally in Yakuza 4. Then recently she decided that she would use that particular opportunity to get her porn on.
That would be neat enough, but as you may know, another lady in Japanese porn, has been in the Yakuza series as well. Rio! Oh Rio. Star of such films as “Squirting Young Wife and Let’s Have Sex at School.”
You’re in quality company, Aihara.
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#2: The Commodore 64 Fucking Lives!
Hit the fucking wayback machine! Classic gaming system the Commodore 64 lives again! It has been repurposed. Modified. Upgraded. Changed, though slightly the same. I hope to have something similar happen to me after the sparkling lights go out within my meat husk. Turn me into a robot, or a crash test dummy, or a remote controlled bomb diffuser or some shit. I must live, though my consciousness has been left to trip the light fantastic.
Though not as dope as my scenarios, the Commodore 64 has been given new life as a computer. Inside the swank keyboard is something with a little bit of thrust.
PCWorld:
The new system, which also starts at $595, is a little more modern: it’s got a Dual Core 525 Atom processor, an Nvidia Ion2 graphics chipset, 2GB of RAM (upgradeable to 4GB), a 160GB hard drive, and built-in Wi-Fi. On the left side of the keyboard there’s a slot or tray-load DVD (upgradeable to Blu-ray), and on the right side there’s a multi-format card reader, along with a USB 2.0 port. The rear features four additional USB 2.0 ports; mouse and keyboard PS/2 ports; DVI, VGA, and HDMI ports; Ethernet; and support for 6-channel HD audio. It runs Linux, but you can install Windows if you like.
It lives again. Not too shabby, though again, it’s not a human body turned into a remote controlled bomb diffusing device. What can you do.
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#3: Anonymous Throws Down With Sony.
Say what you will about their antics, Anonymous taking it to Sony this week is worth mentioning. The nameless legion decided that it was time to inter-fuck Sony’s servers for their persecution of Geohot and other hackers. The result was a deep beating of the PlayStation Network servers, leading to a number of errors and other bullshittery. Later on in the week they suspended their attacks because of it affecting dudes who just wanted to throw hadoukens and rock killstreaks.
Peoples within Sony talked some junk about the cyber-attack, describing it as nothing more that “annoyed…[their] network engineers”, and were planning to wait out the attack until Anonymous got bored. That tactic makes sense to me, though you’re probably going to draw their ire again by belittling the assault.
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PlayStation CEO Spits Hate On Nintendo and Microsoft. Icy Hot!
I am by no means a PlayStation admirer. So if you think I’m wanking on this article because of fanboy preference, ain’t true son. Ain’t true at all. What am I a fan of is Corporation Cock Measuring, Console Clashes, and Dudes Talking Shit. I own every system, I go where my favorite titles migrate, and truthfully? I’m a bit of an Xbox fanboy.
Still though. Sony PlayStation CEO Jack Tretton came out recently in Fortune spitting diamond Word Bullets at Nintendo and Microsoft, and I dug roughly 30% of what he was saying.
Let’s take a look!
