From now on, that is what I’m calling the region of every superhero’s outfit that gently holds their package. Their dong cradle. ‘Cause as you’ll see, Supes’ outfit is gingerly cradling his super-children. Just waiting to doff the outfit, and unfurl the silent terror. I’m not sure what I’m talking about anymore. I just like using the phrase “dong cradle.” Try it.
The world no longer makes sense. Yesterday, I rode my dog around the block. You wouldn’t believe what I saw. A grandmother, wearing a Barry Hussein Is The Jihad t-shirt, breaking her teeth on a piece of frozen pizza. The world no longer makes sense. It is only in this sort of world where I can be sweating Man of Steel so hard.
The William Hicks biopic is getting off the ground, apparently, and Crowe is aiming to direct it. I had no idea that Russell Crowe wanted to make a Bill Hicks movie, let alone that he was a fan of the mad genius.
I caught this Man of Steel trailer prior to my viewing of Dark Knight Rises, and now it is online for the rest of the world to see. My main problem with this teaser trailer is that I actually find it enjoyable. This can only be setting me up for the inevitable disappointment of experiencing yet another Zack Snyder flick. Right? Fuck, I hope I’m wrong.
Man of Steel footage dropped. Here’s some collated reactions, plus a new poster.
I just spent two weeks in grad school learning about the awesomeness that is Dracula. One of the things I took away from it was how the original work has been beaten into paste and abused by pop culture. Eli Roth intends on continuing this trend.
Russell Crowe seems like a sturdy son of a bitch who could both build something and drink too much. This makes him the perfect Noah, a factoid which didn’t escape Darren Aronofsky. The director has paused for long enough from directing J. Lo in nauseating Kohl’s commercials long enough to land a lead man for his bio-disaster-bibilical-journey Noah.
Russell Crowe may be the perfect casting for the alcoholic turned savior Noah in the upcoming Aronofsky eco-disaster-masterpiece-maybe. It was rumored last week, and Sir Telephone Pitcher has confirmed that hes in talks via his Twitter acount.
Russell Crowe is in talks to play Jor-El. If he lands the gig, this movie may fucking rock in spite of Zack Snyder directing it. A cast so filthy is has to be a great movie. Right? Right?