The E3 2010 hype continues, this time in the form of a Fallout: New Vegas trailer with old-ass music, wastelands, and ridiculously gorgeous gameplay. I’m ready, ready like woah for this game. I’ve already begun building a replica bunker from which I shall play the game. I will only leave it every thirty-six hours to scowl at the sky, and feel sun accentuating the sores and gunk-filth coating my unwashed, withering body. Are you in on this commitment to the game with me? Hit the jump for the gorgeous trailer.

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With E3 around the corner, we got some new Dead Space 2 goodness up in here. How about some debut gameplay footage? Say wooooord! Fucking Issac Clarke is back, and he is ready to rock out in the best mash-up of Event Horizon, Alien, and Your Worst Nightmares. Again. The original Dead Space is one of my favorite games of the generation, and I have to cop and admit that this sequel has me flapping my hands up and down excitedly like that girl that used to wear the helmet on the bus.

Hit the jump for the fuggin’ gameplay trailer!

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Fuck to the yeah, Fallout: New Vegas footage. This game is the number one source of my polygonal dicklust, and everytime something new leaks out about it, all my juicy parts begin to leak as well. Pad your seat in absorbent materials, put on your radioactive war face, and hit the jump to check out the video.

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Insomniac Games, the dudes behind the Ratchet and Clank, Resistance, and Spyro are taking their dope-ass shit multiplatform.

via kotaku:

Insomniac Games, the studio behind Spyro the Dragon, Ratchet & Clank and Resistance, unveiled a deal this morning with Electronic Arts that will put their still unannounced, undated next franchise on the Playstation 3 and Xbox 360. Under the agreement Insomniac will retain ownership of the intellectual property.”There have been a lot of great reasons to make games for the Playstation,” said Ted Price, founder and CEO of Insomniac Games. “We have a wonderful relationship with Sony and will continue to work with them on Playstation titles.

“While Insomniac Games’ growth as a developer has been steady, it hasn’t seen any big spikes, Price told Kotaku. Making a game for multiple systems means that the developer and its games will be able to reach a broader audience.”We never wanted to limit ourselves,” Price said. “People are inspired here by having the opportunity to try new things. (Playstation 3 shooter) Resistance was a chance to branch out and we will continue to look for those opportunities.

“The latest chance is bringing Insomniac Games’ upcoming, all-new franchise set in a new universe to the PS3 and Xbox 360. The title is currently in production at the company’s Burbank studio, but Price remained tight-lipped about what it was.

Interesting shit right there. Pretty much the only reason I own my PS3 is for the console-exclusive titles from these boys and Naughty Dog. So the fact that they’re taking their ball and uh, letting other people rub it, is big news. Last month Bungie told Microsoft they were going to dabble in some polygamy, and this month Sony is tots no longer going steady with Insomniac. THE WORLD OF EXCLUSIVES IS FALLING APART.

For years, Xbox fanboys have clung to Bungie. The studio has severed as a legit binkie for all sorts of choads and dickwads to use in their PS3 vs 360 argument. Now all that shit is going to change. With Bungie leaving Microsoft and signing a deal with Activision, the motherfuckers who made fat dudes and dorks ejaculate onto their Halo 3 Ridiculous Edition Spartan Helmet are going multiplatform. You can almost hear the screams of the legions of unwashed masses.

So how about Sony, who is obviously going to let Bungie slither into their disc tray with a grand smile. How are those fuckers feeling? Fucking fantastic:

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Activision, who already owns the fucking gaming universe, just got more powerful. They’ve struck a deal with Bungie to publish their post-Halo games for the next ten years. G’damn!

via kotaku:

According to the official press release, “Under the terms of the agreement, Activision will have exclusive, worldwide rights to publish and distribute all future Bungie games based on the new intellectual property on multiple platforms and devices. Bungie remains an independent company and will continue to own their intellectual property.” From the sound of it, Activision gets to publishing rights to one IP on multiple platforms. This agreement certainly does not mean that Bungie is part of Activision.

It’s pretty fucking impressive. The company that has Guitar Hero, World of Warcraft, and Call of Duty just got fanboy faves into the their stable. You can lead anything with a fucking fuckload of fucking cash to uh, developmental water. Or something. It’s a pretty dope deal for Activision too, since Infinity Ward is all but eviscerated, and who the fuck knows what’s going to happen with the Modern Warfare splinter of the Call of Duty franchise.

Yo! EA Games and Visceral, I’m a big fan of Dead Space. Huge fan. One of my favorite games of the generation. So feel free to send me shit like this:

via destructoid:

Reader Brian Hackney gets some weird stuff in his mail. He just shot over to us some strange Dead Space 2 material that showed up in his real-life inbox the other day. The documents include notes from a doctor who seems to be taking care of someone who is undergoing transformation into a Necromorph, a Rorschach test and an envelope with a stain on it that resembles the silhouette of a man.

Sounds pretty fucking rad and creepy. The day I begin receiving mysterious viral packages from gaming companies is the day I’ll consider myself a success. Until then, feel free to mail me your video game accessories and pictures of Christina Hendricks.

Microsoft announced that they’re going to add support for USB flashdrives! Hey, that’s fucking fantastic! No, not really. My PS3 allowed me to do that like nineteen years ago. How about you let us use fucking external drives.

Via Kotaku

Starting April 6 Xbox 360 owners will be able to use USB flash drives to store profiles, game saves, demos and “more”, Microsoft confirmed this morning.Posting on his blog, Xbox Live’s Larry Hryb said that the company has been testing the feature for a few weeks and that he thinks it’s is “great.” A system updating hitting April 6 will allow us all to see just how great it is. The update will support flash drives that are 1 GB to to 16 GB in size. While USB hard drives “may work”, he adds, you will still only be able to use 16 GB of the drives spaces.

Wait, so you can only use flash drives, or your external hard drives can only be utilized for 16gb of their space? I wonder why.

Hard drives for the 360 are the biggest fucking rip-off going. For $120, you can get a 250gb hard drive. They’re fucking our wallets with thorny cocks. I got a 350gb hard drive for my PS3 for seventy-five dollars. And I’m sure they’re way cheaper now.

How about you douchebags at Microsoft stop raping our wallets and allow us to use the full scope of any external hard drives we may have? ‘Cause I have a 1 TB external hard drive that I paid a hundred bucks for, and that makes a lot more sense to me than getting raped by your proprietary bullshit, okay? I love your system, I already bought the 120gb hard drive like a fucking asshole, I pay for XBOX Live!, c’mon, do me a solid.

God damn, they weren’t kidding. The first thirty minutes of God of War III are fucking insane. I can’t describe the scope of what’s going on. You’re running around on motherfucking Gaia, throwing down with Poseidon. Blood and thunder! Whipping around climbing Gaia, fighting the Lord of the Seas. It’s not so much the graphics, though they’re pretty spectacular. It’s the amount of shit going down on the screen. Epic clash? Hells to the yeah, fools.

The climax of the opening sequence is fucking absurd, yo. Kratos rips Posey out of the guts of some water manifestation of his might, and really just lays down an ass-whupping fit for the God of War. Props to whoever came up with the idea to convey the ass-kicking from the perspective of Poseidon. There’s a point at the end where you’re viewing Kratos through the eyes of Poseidon gouging his eyes out. As Kratos’ thumbs close-in on the dude, you can’t help but feel it some extent. It’s such a visceral idea, that I have to tip my cap to the boys at Santa Monica.

It seems as though this shit is legit. I have a suspicion that this game like all the other God of War titles prior, as well as the Uncharted games, is going to rip its hugest load far before the end of the game. How do you open a game up with such pomp and circumstance, without having a let down by the finale? I’m not sure it is possible.

So far though? Kratos is fucking deities’ eye-sockets with his fingers, to their doom.

Kratos is coming, and he’s fucking pissed. Still. He tried therapy once, but ended up just gouging the dude’s eye out and stamping it into mush. Wait, I think that was actually the thirteen-thousand cyclops he has run through in his travels. Either way.

I rocked out to the God of War III demo back in November and threw it aside with a resounding MEH! The graphics weren’t the second coming I was promised, and the gameplay was the same button-mashing, air-juggling bullshit that I had romped through in the first two games. Mind you, these were games I had enjoyed, but had already gotten my fill of.

Now though?

Now I’m fucking amplified, bro! How can I have a change of heart? Well, there’s a few reasons.

On a superficial level, apparently I wasn’t alone in thinking the graphics were less than mind-fucking in the demo. And better yet these emo complaints were addressed. For the actual game looks far more pimpin’ than the demo. There’s all sorts of complicated terms like Light Density Shadowing and Renderistic Manipulation of Polygonal Testicles and shit going on to explain why they look nicer. I don’t really care why, I’m just happy they do. I’m a superficial douchebag, okay? I got my HDTV, I got my 5.1 system, and I want a bass line so fiercely cranked through my subwoofer I void my bowls into my underpants willingly.

And secondly, let’s be honest. The God of War franchise has never been fantastic because of its base gameplay. The running around and smashing useless enemies thing never blew your pants off. Instead, what got your juices flowing all over your inner thighs were the action sequences. Whether it was fucking up the Hydra in the original game, or uh, doing something in the sequel, the games’ awesomeness were derived from the set pieces. The gameplay inbetween these sequences really don’t serve any purpose for me other than to guide me from one epic confrontation to the next.

Ain’t none of that found in the demo. Ain’t none. So while I was initially disappointed, I did some soul searching. And I came to the conclusion that while I found the regular gameplay highly repetitious, I always had. Realizing this in my heart of hearts, I came to the conclusion that there would certainly be the sort of sequences in the game that had blown me away in the previous two. I had to chill out, man. I had to relax.

This has all been confirmed by people who have gotten to play the game already. What a bag of dicks, those lucky ones. The general consensus is that the game is insane, and the first level will force-fuck your awesome gland until it’s flinging fluids everywhere. All the reviews gleam, I already informed FFXIII we were going to take a quick break, and I’m ready to rock at midnight.