NASA Rover has confirmed giant ass Martian crater used to be a lake!

nasa rover martian crater lake

Motherfucking Mars used to have a lake, dudes. Let’s get there, terraform that shit, and then start this whole shit show all over again. Maybe? Word? I’m kidding, I’m kidding! Unless I ain’t? Anyways, fucking hell, let’s just be stoked about this find.

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NASA’s Mars Rover may on site of Ancient Pond, not huge lake as previously thought. Water is water is water, bro.

mars rover ancient pond not lake

Okay, I know that water is not water is not water. Like, there’s a strong difference between a fucking ancient pond and a huge lake. But, either way, I’m fucking stoked for what the NASA Mars Rover is studying. And besides, this is just one new theory about what the fuck happened in the Gale crater. We still don’t fucking know! The cosmos, man.

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NASA’s Curiosity Rover may be chilling right next to microbe burps on Mars.

When I burp, my wife vomits and the cats leave the room. When microbes on Mars burp, everyone jizzes in their pants. Like, I get it. But also show me some charity. My digestive track is just a collection of cheese and caffeine.

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NASA finds more subsurface lakes on Mars. Probably frozen, but still rad as fuck

nasa scientists mars subsurface lakes

NASA scientists have identified more subsurface lakes on the Red Planet, folks. While they are likely frozen, I still find this to be a bad ass development.

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Rocket Lab wins contract to build spacecraft for NASA’s Mars mission. Let’s fucking go!

rocket lab nasa mars mission

Honestly, I ain’t never heard of Rocket Lab. That is until today, when it was announced they will be designing spacecraft for NASA’s Mars mission. Hey, whatever the fuck it takes! Hey, whomever the fuck it takes! Let’s get our asses to Mars.

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NASA’s Curiosity Rover gives sexy look at cloudy days on Mars

nasa mars curiosity rover clouds

Cloudy days here on the Blue Marble? Fucking suck. Cloudy days on Mars? A novelty, especially when Curiosity sends back images of them.

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NASA Rover detects organic salts on Mars. Could provide further proof of life on the Red Planet!

nasa rover mars organic compounds

The NASA Rover has detected organic salts on the surface of Mars. While I’m too dumb to understand the true implications of this discovery, I do know that it portends well for the potential for life on the planet. Both in the past, and potentially the present. Fucking rad, man!

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China’s Rover has sent back its first images of Mars. It’s a fucking party there now!

China’s got its own Rover on Mars and it’s sending back its own goddamn images of the planet. Between this and the obvious existence of UFOS it’s a fucking intergalactic party these days.

Hit the jump to check them out.

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SpaceX Finally Landed Its Starship Rocket Without Exploding. Hell Yeah.

spacex starship landed without exploding

What a fucking headline, no? But like, you know how it goes. The price of progress is failure, and it appears SpaceX has failed enough for the moment. ‘Cause they finally landed their Starship rocket without it fucking exploding everywhere.

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NASA’s Perseverance Mars Rover Has Created Oxygen on the Planet. Wait what?

nasa mars rover creates oxygen on planet

Wait, just what the fuck is going on? The Rover has successfully created oxygen on Mars? By converting some of the planet’s carbon dioxide-filled atmosphere? Fucking wild, dudes.

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