#April2018

‘Grand Theft Auto V’ is the most profitable piece of media ever, and oh also a dope game

grand theft auto v most profitable media ever

Jesus Christ! I knew Grand Theft Auto V was a perpetual money machine, raking in tremendous amounts of money. However, I had no idea it was approaching (and has now claimed the title of) being the most profitable piece of media ever.

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‘Grand Theft Auto V’ is now the best-selling game ever in the United States. Passing, uh, ‘Wii Sports’

grand theft auto v best selling game ever united states

Folks, Grand Theft Auto V is now the best-selling game ever in the United States. I suppose it’s not really that surprising. You know, given the game’s popularity, and its tethering to the perpetual moneymaker that is GTA Online. However, do you know what is surprising to me? Fucking Wii Sports was the previous best seller.

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‘Grand Theft Auto 5’ has sold more than 80 million copies, that’s a lot of fellow degenerates

grand theft auto v 80 million sales

Jesus fucking Christ, Grant Theft Auto V has sold more than 80 million copies. The title ain’t ever stopping. Nope. Not until GTA VI, and I’m fine with that. I loved the game, and these days I love watching people roleplay in GTA Online on Twitch. Yeah, yeah…I don’t know what that says about me-us-humanity, but whatever.

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‘Grand Theft Auto V’ players solved mystery involving Bigfoot and Teen Wolf. Seriously.

Rockstar and Grand Theft Auto V‘s community are tight, man. Fucking around with one another. The former hiding shit in code (seriously), the latter working diligently to figure out just what is fucking hidden. The latest case of this back and forth, cat and mouse, involves Bigfoot. Peyote. And Teen Wolf.

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Watch: Invincible Deer wandering ‘Grand Theft Auto V’, causing shootouts and traffic jams

Wandering Deer!

I wrote a whole thing up about this, then WordPress shit the bed. So, uh. This is a pretty amazing piece of The Future. Grand Theft Auto V has been modified to feature an Invincible Deer. You can watch of said Invincible Deer. Wandering San Andreas, causing shootouts and traffic jams.

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Watch: Carl Sagan’s “Pale Blue Dot” Speech recreated in ‘Grand Theft Auto V’

Watch: NWA’s “Straight Outta Compton” recreated in ‘Grand Theft Auto V’

Watch: The Opening of ‘The Fresh Prince’ done in ‘Grand Theft Auto V’

Genius-Level Grand Theft Auto V modders are Genius-Level.

‘Grand Theft Auto 5’ has sold 45 Million Copies. HELL OF A HEIST LOL.

LOVE

I played through Grand Theft Auto V during Winter Break, and it threatened to steal my soul. What started off as oh okay this is a game turned into I never want to leave Michael, Franklin, and Trevor. Ever! Fuck you, Mom! These pants aren’t dirty, they’re loved-in. And then they had to “force me to take my meds” and “make me well.” Whatever.

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Monday Morning Commute: Watch Your Step

watch your step

Watch your fucking step. It’s a goddamn cold one out there. At least if you’re like yours truly, living in the Northeast Quadrant of the Empire Proper. But should not grouse too loudly, for I am lucky enough to be able to ignite the heating-systems on my room in the Space-Ship. Huddle up underneath blankets of Local Sporting Team, plug into the OMNI-NETS, and converse with you folk. The specific topic of our conversation? Well seeing that this is Monday Morning Commute, let us discus what we are stoked for this week. What are the TV shows, sporting events, philosophical treatises, and tumblr accounts getting you through this latest installment of grind?

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