#March2019

Jupiter could be cracking its moon Europa with its thunderous magnetic field. I say, g’damn!

jupiter cracking europa

Yo, Jupiter! Fucking chill, bro. Apparently you may be cracking your moon Europa with your tremendous magnetic field. Which, okay I’ll grant you, is pretty fucking bad ass.

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Jupiter’s moon Europa got five-story spikes of ice. Sounds dope, makes landing on the moon a pain in the ass

jupiter moon europa frozen spikes

Space is fucking metal, my dudes. Jupiter’s moon Europa has got five-story spikes of ice! This sounds fucking dope! However, it makes the prospect of landing on Europa decidedly more difficult.

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NASA Wants To Send Lander To Europa To Detect Life

nasa europa life detecting

NASA is fixing to send a life-detecting lander to Europa! Hey, detect that life, folks. Cause god knows how much longer we’re going to have it here, right? Too morbid? Too morbid!

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NASA finds more evidence of Water Plumes on Europa

Elon Musk is taking our asses to Mars. Maybe. So like, can someone get on settling Europa? NASA has found further evidence of water plumes on the moon, furthering the idea that it has subsurface oceans. Fucking astounding.

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NASA: We’re going to Europa, hunting for futzin’ alien life

Today was the first day of development for NASA’s mission to get us to Europa. Where we will find life. Giant, multi-tittied omnisexual telepathic beings, who will have no time for us monkeys and our cruelties.

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Space Swoon! Europa’s Jupiter-Facing Hemisphere is ready for its close-up

Europa? Euro-beautiful one

I say goddamn! This is a glorious mosaic of Europa’s Jupiter-facing dome piece.

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Space-Swoon: Highest-Res look at Europa’s Surface

eurpoa

Ooph! Ain’t this a fucking dazzling display of Europa’s surface. NASA space-wizards have done something-such beyond my means of comprehension to achieve this beauty. Assembling a variety of pictures and uh, processing and stuff. They can explain it better than I can.

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NASA: Testing laser-powered drill to explore Jupiter’s moon, Europa

Europa, wut wut

How the fuck we going to explore Jupiter’s moon, Europa? Eh! It’s iced out as fuck! NASA got itself an idea of how to go about doing it, and it’s begun testing this idea. A fucking laser-powered drill.

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New photo of (Jupiter’s Moon) Europa sports rivers of red ice

aw yis

I say goddamn!!! Here’s a new glorious look at Europa. Sporting some straight-up rivers of red ice. No doubt carrying the corpses of of humanity’s Progenitor Species, The Appalachian Dingus-Sapiens to their final resting place. Namely the Tombs of Oblivion, deep underneath Europa’s husk.

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NASA planning ROBOTIC MISSION to Europa to SEARCH FOR LIFE.

Europa.

We’re going to Europa! With a fucking robot in tow! Make no mistake about it, we’re hunting down life. The Europians shall soon know the glory that is McDonald’s, American football, and human excess! Flee while you can, fuckers!

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