Yo, Jupiter! Fucking chill, bro. Apparently you may be cracking your moon Europa with your tremendous magnetic field. Which, okay I’ll grant you, is pretty fucking bad ass.
Jupiter’s moon Europa got five-story spikes of ice. Sounds dope, makes landing on the moon a pain in the ass
Space is fucking metal, my dudes. Jupiter’s moon Europa has got five-story spikes of ice! This sounds fucking dope! However, it makes the prospect of landing on Europa decidedly more difficult.
NASA is fixing to send a life-detecting lander to Europa! Hey, detect that life, folks. Cause god knows how much longer we’re going to have it here, right? Too morbid? Too morbid!
Elon Musk is taking our asses to Mars. Maybe. So like, can someone get on settling Europa? NASA has found further evidence of water plumes on the moon, furthering the idea that it has subsurface oceans. Fucking astounding.
Today was the first day of development for NASA’s mission to get us to Europa. Where we will find life. Giant, multi-tittied omnisexual telepathic beings, who will have no time for us monkeys and our cruelties.
I say goddamn! This is a glorious mosaic of Europa’s Jupiter-facing dome piece.
Ooph! Ain’t this a fucking dazzling display of Europa’s surface. NASA space-wizards have done something-such beyond my means of comprehension to achieve this beauty. Assembling a variety of pictures and uh, processing and stuff. They can explain it better than I can.
How the fuck we going to explore Jupiter’s moon, Europa? Eh! It’s iced out as fuck! NASA got itself an idea of how to go about doing it, and it’s begun testing this idea. A fucking laser-powered drill.
I say goddamn!!! Here’s a new glorious look at Europa. Sporting some straight-up rivers of red ice. No doubt carrying the corpses of of humanity’s Progenitor Species, The Appalachian Dingus-Sapiens to their final resting place. Namely the Tombs of Oblivion, deep underneath Europa’s husk.
We’re going to Europa! With a fucking robot in tow! Make no mistake about it, we’re hunting down life. The Europians shall soon know the glory that is McDonald’s, American football, and human excess! Flee while you can, fuckers!