Rip and tear your bank account, amirite? Still though, would be fun to own these fucking cultural artifacts. If you count simple floppies owned by a game’s creator as cultural artifacts. (I think I do?)

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The studio behind Kill la Kill and all-time-fave of mine, Gurren Lagann, has announced three new projects. Most excitingly? The one that’s being described as a cross between the former and the latter.

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Assassin’s Creed is getting an anime. Now, now! Before you bark and gnash, bark and gnash. Let me tell you. It’s being produced by the same man who had a hand in Netflix’s Castlevania series, as well as cult favorite Dredd.

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Matt Reeves has come out and said what’s obvious: he’s inspired by the Dark Knight Trilogy. But, really, who at DC isn’t? Even if it’s a reactionary, “no, we aren’t like Nolan” response, that very negative space is in of itself an inspiration. That said, Reeves clearly means he *is* inspired by the films. Is that a good thing, though? I don’t know. First blush is to respond “oh, cool”, second blush is “yeah but do something new” you know? All in all, it’s the middle of the summer and news is slow, I actually imagine this is just director-on-director masturbation. Frottage, if you will.

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Mondo. In case you ever feel down about the state of officially-produced posters for superhero movies, just know Mondo out here. Doing god’s work.

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Keeping with my new stance on unnecessary reboots, sequels, and adaptations, I’m just going to be positive about this grossly unnecessary sequel(s) to FLCL. If it sucks, it sucks. Can’t let it maim my love for the original.

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Nick Fury is co-starring in the Captain Marvel movie. The cynic in me is hollering with disdain that Marvel doesn’t trust Brie Larson to carry the first female-led superhero movie for their studio. The fanboy in me is whooping with glee that Fury is back in a Marvel flick. How do you feel about this shit?

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Holy shit. Mahershala Ali is in early talks to join True Detective‘s third season. Which, it should be noted, hasn’t officially been greenlit. That said, man. Having him on the cast really is a win-win scenario. If the third season sucks, well, the show has already flatlined. If it rules, we have more god-tier acting from Mahershala Ali, and another season of dope television.

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I’m a sucker for the Fourth of July. Or at the very least, the notion of it. As someone who is both a recluse *and* has to fucking work on the 3rd and the 5th, I imagine I won’t be doing much literal celebrating. But, the holiday gets to me.

Maybe it’s the programming from growing up a KidBot during the end of the Cold War and into the Myth of a New Golden age, but I have to admit — there’s a twinge of excitement at the idea of Seared Flesh and American Flags.

It’s the sort of deep-seated, inextricable programming that pops up from time to time, attempt to defy it as I may. The same programming that has me unconsciously doing the Sign of the Cross during a Catholic wedding or some shit. Which, has happened, and as it happened I looked appalled at my own gestures like I had a fucking Ghost Hand.

So here I sit, melancholic for the old days when I Believe In Things, and Celebrated Stuff. So here I sit, melancholic for the days when folks used to come around these parts, and spend the Weekend Open Bar with me.

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I’ve tried rallying my friends around the idea of Matt Reeves’ The Batman kicking ass. Cynical fuckers, and justified by the movie’s troubled development, they’re reticent. Well, fuckers! How about this? Warner Bros. themselves are excited by the director’s vision for the movie.

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