As Forrest Gump once said, “Rumors is as rumors does, boogers, cliche pop culture reference, tee-hee pee joke”. We should have recalled that line from that movie over the weekend, when it rumors about Harrison Ford appearing in the Blade Runner sequel came to boil. It ain’t happening folks! Probably.

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I just woke up from a nap. The time-stamp on my compu-deck is 9:45PM. The natural inference is that I’m going to stay up too late, not get enough sleep, and drag ass all day tomorrow.

This is going to be a problem.

So how will I combat the First World Problem of being overtired at work? Well, with huge scoops of entertainment that’ll either sharpen my mind or further dull it! And how will I tell the lovely OL patrons which mind-bullets I’ll be loading into my metaphor-pistol? Why, with this very post – the MONDAY MORNING COMMUTE!

C’mon, hop aboard and check out how I’ll be coping with the indentured servitude that is the forty-hour workweek. After you see which snake-oils I’m sipping on, hit up the comments section and show off your own curative elixirs.

1,2,3. 1,2,3. Keep it up.

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The Amazing Spider-Man is the movie I keep forgetting about this year. It could be great! It really could. It just keeps slipping my mind underneath an avalanche of Dark Knight Rises, Prometheus, Avengers, Django Unchained, Looper…and more. There’s some new images from the flick, as well as wordage from director Marc Webb regarding the flick.

Hit the jump to check it out.

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The comic market experienced its best January in four fucking years. I mean, we have to be happy about this, right?

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Jak and Daxter! Oh how I love you, though you continue to recede into the recesses of my brain-skull. Naughty Dog almost revived you, and then realized they could make way, way, way more  money making that Ellen Page Zombies Game they’re working on.

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Max Landis dropped a dope movie in Chronicle this past weekend (go see it!), and his drunken ranting recap of the Death of Superman is also tearing across the inter-teats like you wouldn’t fucking believe.

Hit the jump for the madness.

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There was some soccer game last night or some shit *cough* and I didn’t really watch it or something. However, apparently a really awesome Avengers trailer aired during it that may or may not be capable of cheering up people who rooted for the New Britain Red Coats or whatever.

Hit the jump for the awesome.

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I was pretty cool with another movie taking place in the Blade Runner universe so long as we didn’t have to see a haggard ass Harrison Ford in it. I may not be pretty cool with it for much longer.

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There is no greater trial of will than that of the reigning champion. Sure, on the one hand champions are bathed in the adulation of admirers, those lesser-thans who need this hero to represent them in all the ways they can’t represent themselves. On the other hand, great kings also inspire the dissident hordes who want nothing more than to see the crown filched from head, smelted down, and forged into shackles.

When you’re on top, some people love you. But others want to watch you fail. And as such, you have to constantly watch the throne.

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J.J. Abrams keeps getting the go at television shows, despite the fact that his name carries very little street cred these days with fools of my generation. At least when it comes to his TV shows, featuring Spies-Dimension-Sprawling-Monster-Mysteries. This latest one? He’s teaming up with the creator of Supernatural to bang out an apocalypse drama.

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