Do you understand the spatial confusion that comes with the Thaw? Here I am, freshly out of my Cryo-Pod and pressed into service. That’s right, those aghast. Rendar isn’t here this week. It’s your boy, Caff-Pow. I was orbiting a particularly interesting noodle along the orbit of Charlatan-IV where the distress beacon run. It spoke to me in words and phrases I couldn’t understand; I wasn’t familiar with.

Beep – too busy. real world responsibilities. grown-up stuff.

Beep – do you comply, brother?

Being a good space-bound brother, I obliged. I may not understand responsibilities or the real world, but I do understand the humble request from a man who descended out of the same Momma gut as me. Entering my finger-prints-semen-saliva-testicle-taint into the recognition software, I jettisoned my temporary virtuality. Good bye, Charlatan-IV. Hello MONDAY MORNING COMMUTE. The column where we share those distractions that keep us cutting while peering into the oblivion of the wash-work-wank-rinse cycle that will transport us from one edge of oblivion into the next.

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Hell of a picture right hurr, taken by Cassini. Check out a close-up of Saturn’s moon Dione, with all sorts of interesting things happening in the back ground.

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There’s a new US law being proposed that would make domestic propaganda legal. My question is — why? Any sort of propaganda the Media/Government Hype Machine wanted to ricochet off the Echo Chamber can be done just through the bedding of these two entities without a law. Why wake up the hoi polloi  (temporarily) by even suggesting this?

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Now that Diablo 3  has dropped and BioShock Infinite  has gotten shoved into a date past the Year of Mayan Oblivion, I’m hard pressed to figure out a jam I want more this year than Borderlands 2. I’m also not really thinking that hard, between the caffeine haze and my ADD.

Here’s some info on my must-have.

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From the ’60s-style promotional video for the Arboria Institute that opens the film to the final jarring minutes of the film, Beyond the Black Rainbow brings you under its control and lulls you into a visual and audio trance. During your immersive state of hypnosis, it might be easy to overlook the heady themes of writer-director Panos Cosmatos’ debut feature. Against a throbbing, psychadelic backdrop, Cosmatos tells a story of repression and contrition set in an alternate 1983 that will not be easily shaken from your memory. It’s a beautiful nightmare I didn’t want to end.

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Here’s the teaser trailer for Anchorman: The Legend Continues. It wants you to cream your pants; I suggest you  acquiesce. It feels good, you know?

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DC is reversing the claim they made last year where they stated that they would not reintroduce an established prominent character as gay, instead wanting to focus on organically introducing homosexual characters into their universe. What a difference a year makes, no?

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This teaser trailer for Skyfall  is pretty much in line with everything I’ve come to associate with the Daniel Craig Bond  films. It’s gorgeous, with a smattering of explosions and sexuality, and not really clear in terms of plot. I can’t wait.

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Marvel, and Disney aren’t taking their Avengers  success sitting down. Even though the flick is still demolishing box office records, deets regarding the eventual DVD and Blu-Ray disc have come out, giving its finger to all our fanboy and fangirl wallets.

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If I was going to hire a head of cybersecurity, it would totally be Zero Cool. You know, Hackers  reference? Am I getting too old? Too lame? My back hurts. The lights are dimming.

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