#Welcome To the Future
Burger King launches cryptocurrency in Russia because the future is weird and grease covered
Why the fuck not, right? Burger King has launched a cryptocurrency in Russia, the WhopperCoin. Can’t make this shit up. Some straight-up Snow Crash shit. The future is wild.
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Shanghai Launches The Tallest Evangelion Statue In The World
Shanghai! Launches! Get it? Cause, they’re always screaming “LAUNCH EVA” in Evangelion? Yeah, yeah. If I don’t respect myself of course I don’t expect you to respect me. Dicks.
Watch: ‘Blade Runner’ Fan Recreates Deckard’s Apartment In VR
Cheers, Quentin Lengele. You’ve recreated Deckard’s apartment in VR, thereby confirming you’re a way bigger fan of the movie than me. And, fuck, I’ve always prided myself on my love for the movie.
KFC’s Latest Tech Suggests Orders Based On Your Face
KFC has some new technology that is ready to suggests orders to you. Based on your face. Hey, makes sense. I’m always hungry for some Deep Fried Sadness and Flatulence-Caked Mashed Potatoes.
Watch: ‘Wolfenstein 3D’ Running On A Gameboy Color
Anders Granlund ain’t fucking around. Dude has gotten Wolfenstein 3D running on a Gameboy Color. Had to custom make the cartridge and everything.
Dinosaur Tail Found Preserved in Amber And Covered In Feathers
A dinosaur tail has been found! Preserved in amber. Covered in feathers. 99 million years old. Friggin’ rad.
Weekend Open Bar: Welcome Fellow Travellers!
Welcome, fellow travellers! Welcome here to the Open Bar, upon the Space-Ship Omega! I #cantstop and I #wontstop the cheesy, but ultimately enjoyable (for me) conceit! You know, the one about this website being a Space-Ship. You know, the one about us being denizens of a shuddering, weathered, but comforting hunk of self-propelling space-junk amid the abyss of the internet cosmos.
As I said, it’s comforting.
Netflix Offline Viewing Is Now Available For Our Consumption Needs
You can now finally download Netflix movies for offline viewing. Finally! So download all them movies and get media-corpulent while disconnected from bandwidth-pipes.
MIT Builds Synthetic Muscles Out Of Nylon Cord
This is good. Good. If our Robot Overlords are (hopefully) coming soon (to save us from Trump), then I would prefer they at least *look* human.
Maybe: This Is A Fossilized Dinosaur Brain
In 2004, a fossil collector may have found a fossilized dinosaur brain some fifty miles outside of London. That’s some fucking luck. All I find wandering the streets are sexy boys with cheshire grins, and half-chewed quarters.
