#Video Games
‘Soulcalibur VI’ Trailer: The franchise returns next year on PC and Consoles
Man, fucking Soulcalibur. This announcement takes me the fuck back. However, if I’m being honest, I remember it most for how the cleavage got my adolescent groin sloppy. But, I also vaguely recall a fun fighting game.
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‘In the Valley of the Gods’ Trailer: ‘Firewatch’ devs go to Egypt for their next adventure
Firewatch is an objectively awesome game. Campo Santo is an objectively awesome developer. So, I’m pretty excited for the follow up to the former by the latter. How is that for a fucking convoluted sequence of sentences? Eh!?
Sony has sold more than 70.6 Million PlayStation 4s worldwide. Its console base is legion
The PlayStation is a fucking titan at this point, folks. Sony has sold more than 70.6 million of this motherfuckers, and for good reason. The son of a bitch has an incredible library of exclusives, with a fuckton more on the way.
‘Mega Man 11’ Trailer: Rock Man Returns in 2018
In 2018, motherfuckin’ Capcom is giving us plebs some more Mega Man. Finally! I say, goddamn! This is of course coming now that they’re done laughing at the dumpster fire that was Mighty No. 9, the franchise’s spiritual successor whatever.
Nintendo planning to heavily increase Switch hardware production in 2018. Apparently they like money more than scarcity
Nintendo got themselves some fucking plans in 2018 to ramp up Switch production. Not exactly a fucking controversial move, here. You know, given that the console dropped two of the best reviewed games since I sprouted pubes in the same fucking year.
‘Assassin’s Creed Origins’ has already doubled the initial sales of the previous installment. Dare I say, killing the sales charts
The latest AssCreed has doubled the sales of the previous title across the same launch period. Drink that the fuck in. I’m not surprised though, because everything I’ve read about Assassin’s Creed Origins suggests that at the very least, it’s fun. A reinvention of a viscous formula? Not quite. However, the impression seems that the franchise benefitted from actually, oh I don’t know, taking a fucking year off. So, here’s hoping that Ubisoft makes the connection between the uptick in sales, and the deannualization of AssCreed.
EA is acquiring ‘Titanfall’ developer. Let’s see how long until they ruin yet another studio
Electronic Arts is acquiring Respawn Entertainment, the studio behind Titanfall. Now the clock is ticking, folks. Let’s see how long it takes the Behemoth to suck all the marrow out of this recently purchased studio. Let’s see how long before its carcass can be thrown onto the heap alongside the shit-soaked ruins of BioWare and the desiccated husk of Visceral Games.
Microtransactions account for nearly half of ‘GTA’ publisher Take-Two’s goddamn revenue
Games as services, bay-bee! Games as fucking transaction machines, bay-bee! Even if you hate both of these models, you better get used to them. ‘Cause they’re the goddamn profit engines for countless gaming companies, such as Take-Two.
‘Grand Theft Auto V’ is now the best-selling game ever in the United States. Passing, uh, ‘Wii Sports’
Folks, Grand Theft Auto V is now the best-selling game ever in the United States. I suppose it’s not really that surprising. You know, given the game’s popularity, and its tethering to the perpetual moneymaker that is GTA Online. However, do you know what is surprising to me? Fucking Wii Sports was the previous best seller.
Blizzard bringing their own official “Vanilla” servers to ‘World of Warcraft’
Blizzard is finally giving fans something they’ve wanted, and created for themselves for a while now. That’s right fuckaroos, World of Warcraft is getting its own “Vanilla” servers.
