#Caffeine Powered
Sony’s PlayStation 5 reveal now scheduled for June 11! Hell fucking yes.
Sony has officially rescheduled their delayed PlayStation 5 reveal, friends! It’s coming this Thursday, June 11. I’m absolutely fucking stoked.
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Weekend Open Bar: Ride The Dusk!
Hey-o, hey-o, hey! Yeah, can you tell I got nothing, friends? Nothing much crackling right now, this Friday afternoon. However, the weekend? I’m not really sure! As I mentioned earlier this week, my anniversary is on Saturday. But, Sam has a busy weekend of yoga training, and I’ve got an inclination to celebrate it during more placid times. So, where does that leave me? Probably gaming, reading, and stroking!
In other words, business as usual. Which is okay. Which is okay! I mean, right? It’s gotta be okay, because it’s gotta be this way.
‘Midsommar’ director Ari Aster’s next movie is a “nightmare comedy” that’s four-hours long. Sign me the fuck up, anyways!
Midsommar director Ari Aster’s next flick is a “nightmare comedy” running four-hours long. I’ve been on record multiple, multiple times saying that no movie should be more than ninety minutes. So, you can go ahead and call me a fraud here. My deflection? This is one of those times where the exception proves the rule. Suck it.
Longest known comet tail stretched for over a billion kilometers! A fucking billion!
Man, space is fucking huge. Incomprehensibly so. The latest example? This comet tail, which stretched for over a billion kilometers. Insane.
Mars may have once had rings, according to new research. The Red Planet fucking rocks, dudes
Oh fucking hell! Mars has a goddamn monopoly on awesomeness in our solar system (though, granted, Jupiter is amazing, so is Saturn, okay, they’re all rad). Apparently, the son of a bitch may have once had rings.
Sega has revealed the Game Gear Micro, an insanely small-ass retro handheld!
Sega! The fuck you up to, dudes? The Game Gear Micro? A handheld that’s screen is only 1.15-inches? Uh, okay!
Lost, never-released ‘Days of Thunder’ NES game reconstructed from 40 different floppy discs. Oh fuck yeah!
How is this for rad-as-fuck nostalgia porn? Video game conservationists have reconstructed a never-released Days of Thunder NES game. From over 40 floppy discs. My word, this fucking rocks.
Monday Morning Commute: Five Years In A Lifetime
The Universe, as expressed through time, don’t give two tugs of Fate’s tits about us, my friend. And in some ways, that’s pretty fucking freeing. Lord knows, we’re fucking it up down here with an alacrity and casualness that would definitely piss off most religion’s Gods. But, they don’t exist and we’re alone, and the Universe is just humming along. Indifferent, but wonderful. Detached, but in a sort of measured, comforting manner.
Anyways, the whole reason I started babbling about existence, the Cosmos not even mustering a shrug at humanity, and all this happy horseshit is thus: I’m celebrating my five-year anniversary on Saturday. What the absolute fuck, how the absolute fuck have five years passed already?
In many ways, 2015 was a severe mid-series reboot of my existence. To the extent that, while I don’t regret any of the choices, I would never stack such changes on top of one another so quickly. In the span of three months I got married, bought a house, and got a dog.
There was a moment that autumn where I asked myself, “Who the fuck am I? And what the fuck am I doing?” in a sort of feverish worry.
But, now it’s difficult to picture myself not living with my wife, walking my dog, or fondly returning to my small house. Which is an overly opaque way of saying I enjoy my life, and I find myself smiling now at the chaos. Perhaps that’s the goal, to be able to come out the other side of the Tumult, and be able to smile at it.
Who knows. I’m bloviating, per usual.
Only tangentially related to that saccharine blast of textual diarrhea is this here column, Monday Morning Commute! Or, maybe I’m just being disingenuous. ‘Cause when I think of what I enjoy most in my life, spending time here and on Twitch with the rest of the OL community is high on the list.
So my dudes, let’s hang out. Shoot the shit about what we’re getting into this week.
I’ll go first!
Shazam!
SpaceX Crew Dragon capsule has successfully docked with the International Space Station. Three cheers for privatizing space!
I’m pretty fucking stoked that SpaceX successfully launched its rocket, and docked with the ISS. At the same time, I’m bummed that it’s going to be Musk and a bunch of billionaire dickheads that colonize the Microsoft Galaxy and Planet Starbucks.
Space Swoon: Hubble captures a gorgeous tapestry of thousands of stars. Fucking universe, man!
Here’s a little batch of cosmic glory for you motherfuckers, on this Friday. It’s a gorgeous tapestry taken by the Hubble Space Telescope, and captures thousands of stars. I said, thousands!
Hit the jump for the full glory and details!
