#Caffeine Powered
‘Sin City’ TV series coming with Robert Rodriguez in talks to join project. Could be great! Could be ass!
I fucking loved Sin City back in the day. Then, I tried to rewatch it. Don’t, don’t do it. It just ain’t the same. But, I’m still down for a TV series. Let’s see how it goes!
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Engineer finds way to possibly pull diseases from blood using magnets. Just look at this fucking sentence!
An engineer has found a potential way to pull diseases from blood using magnets. Listen, get out of my ass. I know this may never come to fruition. But, just the fact that it’s a possibility gets me horny for science.
Japan’s Hayabusa2 spacecraft is returning to Earth with asteroid samples! This is either wonderful, or terrifying.
Japan’s spacecraft is coming home, baby! And Hayabusa2 returning alone, nope! It’s bringing samples from a nearby asteroid with it. This is really fucking rad, or the start of countless science-fiction movies where shit goes really, really wrong.
Curiosity Rover finds weird oxygen fluctuations on Mars. We’re on to you, Illuminati!
Ha! I knew the fucking Illuminati was hiding out on Mars. Now, it’s pretty much all but confirmed. Okay, okay, maybe not. But still. NASA’s Curiosity Rover has detected mysterious oxygen fluctuations on the Red Planet. Either way, it’s fucking awesome.
‘Black Adam’ is dropping December, 2021. Look at this hilariously shit-ass poster The Rock shared to announce it!
Black Adam! You know the DC movie featuring Dwayne Johnson that’s been in development forever? It’s got a release date! December 22, 2021. The Rock announced it with an official poster that sucks, just like all his movies. Well, outside the Furious franchise, but whatever.
‘Beverly Hills Cop 4’ coming to Netflix with option for a fifth. I’m fucking in, dudes!
I just recently saw Beverly Hills Cop for the first time! But, man I fucking loved it. So completely ignorant to the quality of the sequels, the news of Beverly Hills Cop 4 on Netflix excites me.
Monday Morning Commute: Booty Hunting Is A Complicated Profession
It ’tis I, the booty hunter! You know me! The man who can stare at gifs of butts on Tumblr for hours, but is always late with Monday Morning Commute. Listen! Listen. Booty hunting is a complicated profession. But more than that, it is gloriously passive. Way easier to watch ’em giggle than to pen something. Even slop! Even slop such as this, I know.
But! The booty hunter has arrived, and I’ve got with me my weekly satchel of sacred distractions that are getting me through the week. And oh, fuck, do I hate the weeks lately. Dark as fuck. Cold as fuck. I want to bury myself in blankets and caloric excess and wait for Spring. But, I can’t yield just yet. I mean, we got a significant amount of fucking months to go, and I can’t throw in the towel.
So this here is Monday Morning Commute! And the forthcoming are what I’m enjoying or looking forward to this week! I hope you’ll share your own satchel of sacred distractions in the comments section!
I must admit, I’m going to be quick! Dinner is on the way, and The Mandalorian awaits me. If I can punch this out prior to Mr. Door Dash arriving, I’ll be ecstatic.
Xbox One is getting a shuffle button to randomly choose a game from your backlog. One less decision to make in a life of meaningless decisions, wee!
The Xbox One is getting a “surprise me” button, which is a shuffle button by any other name. The function? As it sounds. Instead of staring blankly at your backlog trying to figure out what to play, the console will choose a title for you. Then invariably you’ll hit it again, searching for some sort of fulfillment in an increasingly concerning existence.
Have fun!
Paul Thomas Anderson dropping new movie in 2020. Takes place in high school in the 1970s. Okay, okay, okay!
I didn’t really fuck with PTA’s The Phantom Thread. Felt like wanky, woe-be-the-white-genius type of shit. That said? I’m stoked for his next movie in 2020, where he’s returning to the 1970s, baby!
An Alien-Themed brothel has bought a sex robot. The future’s here, and of course, it’s about sex.
An alien-themed brothel has bought a sex robot, friends. Not only that, but it’s pairing it with teledildonics (that’s a real word), so that one may have a remote-experience with the sex robot. Hey, man. The Earth is on fire and Democracy is dead, but we can fart on robots now in order to get off. From across the globe. Progress?
