#July2016

Monday Morning Commute: The sky above the port was the color of television

Monday Morning Commute! On a Monday Evening! Truthfully, this tardiness is, relativistically speaking, pretty good compared to my usual antics. In fact, this column would have slithered out of my mind-hole earlier had the words come to me. Sometimes the Muses toss lightning bolts up your ass, and you feel Empowered. Emboldened. Surfing The Edge. Sometimes the Muses retreat to a 7-Eleven bathroom to trib with faeries and knaves and satyrs. Coating themselves in the slickening sugary confections we pass off as food, writhing in wrappers and detritus, orgasming in supplication to the Eternal Engine which neither Cares nor Notices us.

Today? For me? The Muses are fucking around with the fucking faeries in the fucking bathroom.  But still, I persist. But still, I exist. Put that on a Hallmark card and staple it onto my forehead, I know it’s fucking lame.

Today? For me? I’m going to write this column anyways. Even though the Muses ain’t here. I’m going to tell you everything I’m excited about this week. Even though the Muses ain’t here. I’m going to ask you to join me, vapid, broken, banal me, in the comments section, letting me know what you are excited for this week. Even though the Muses ain’t here.

Well? Shall we?

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‘Suicide Squad’ Official Comic-Con Soundtrack Remix Trailer: This Is The Deal

Suicide Squad TV Spots: Worst. Heroes. Ever.

I really just want to watch two hours of Harley Quinn. I know this makes me a fedora-wearing dick lord, but I can’t help it. If these teasers are telling me anything, though, it’s that at the very least I’m going to enjoy her in this movie.

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‘Harley Quinn’ movie coming; Margot Robbie To Produce and Star

HARLEY QUINNZ

Harley Quinn is obviously my favorite part of the Suicide Squad movie. ‘Cause she’s a total bananas babe, and I’m a fourteen year-old boy (not) deep down at all. So bring on a solo movie, bring on a solo movie with the star producing and starring.

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‘Suicide Squad’ Trailer: Baddies Have All The Fun (In The DCU)

This movie, if the trailers are any indication, is shaping up to be very entertaining.

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‘Suicide Squad’ undergoing reshoots to make it “more fun”

‘Suicide Squad’ Trailer: Worst of the Worst!  (And Fun As Hell)

Remember when the Suicide Squad trailer looked fucking fun? An antidote to the misery of BvS? Well, apparently the trailer contained all (I’m not making this up) the fun. WB, attempting to do something right, has ordered reshoots to add more humor to the movie. Cause yeah. That trailer looked fun. It’s okay to have fun, WB.

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‘Suicide Squad 2’ planned for 2017 with Ayer and Smith returning

Suicide Squad Poster

I’m pretty excited for Suicide Squad. The latest trailer hooked me, with an irreverence and playfulness that I wasn’t expecting, and didn’t realize I was silently wanting. That said, I enjoyed the Man of Steel trailer. So what the fuck do I know/what the fuck can you really gleam from a trailer? None the less, the film is getting a sequel. With the director and Fresh Prince returning.

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Jim Lee will be artist on ‘Suicide Square’ during DC’s “Rebirth” Relaunch, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Suicide Squad

I don’t fuck with Jim Lee. I’ve caught flack for that around these parts in the past, so let me say: I respect him, and his influence on the comic book landscape. But as far as his art? Eh. But as far as his presence on a title drawing me towards a purchase. Nah.

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‘Suicide Squad’ Trailer: Worst of the Worst (And Fun As Hell)!

Man. I’m not going to lie to you. This trailer has me pretty excited for this film. Like. Man. I don’t know. Seems out of its futzing mind, in all the right ways. At the very least it seems decidedly different fare.

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Jared Leto’s The Joker revealed on ‘Empire Magazine’ cover as sweatpants-boner Hot Topic nerd

Empire Magazine lol

That’s all I really have to say about this picture. Feel free to add your own thoughts, though.

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