Here’s the Alien: Covenant trailer. A movie that seems to tenuously be connected to the movie Prometheus through the Magneto-Android, and is in every other right just an Alien flick. Which is a good thing for most people. Cause me? After seeing the trailer? I’m excited.
The truth is that I’m going to see Ridley Scott’s Alien: Covenant regardless of what is said about it prior to (or at its) release. It’s Ridley Scott, its an Alien movie. But if I was straight-up *pretending* that I wasn’t interested initially because Prometheus was raw-ass served up with a side order of marbled diarrhea chunks, I would say the addition of Kenny fucking Powers intrigues me enough to consider it.
There is someone out there who is excited for the second Prometheus movie. There is somewhere in me that’s excited for the second Prometheus movie, hoping that no Damon Lindelof will fix the problems with the first movie. Especially since Scott has proven himself still a competent filmmaker, on the back of The Martian. This news is for us!
Damon Lindelof has spoken out against movie disaster porn, which is hilarious. Such a act of dumb assery underscores the fact that Lindelof is not just a fledgling, self-congratulatory, horrific plotter. Instead he is also the recipient of at best, an embryonic sense of self. Dude tries to cop to being guilty of movie disaster porn whilst denouncing it, but let’s be honest. The hack has spent the last two summers getting rich as fuck off of the cheap trick, penning two movies (Prometheus and Star Trek Into Ennui) that feature iconography that harkens back to 9/11.
If the shit show that was Prometheus didn’t talk you out of believing that the sequel to Blade Runner would be good, take a fat hit of this to your dome. The fucking writer for the bloody diarrhea monster that was Green Lantern has been brought aboard the project.
Abandon hope, all ye.
Why are all the scientists so fucking dumb in Prometheus? ‘Cause Lindelof is a hack? Yeah, that’s probably correct. However, for those wanting to absolve Damon “I’m So Clever” Lindelof of blame, this video should be your smoking gun. It was their training. Doi.
It’s that time again. Time to shove our meaty paws into the depths of the internet grab bag and see what fun prizes we can scoop out. And this week is a treat: Pro-me-the-us! The film’s stunning visuals were like whipped cream on a pile of shit. But we already knew that from our more scholarly interpretations found elsewhere on Spaceship OL. Now we get to check out what other sardonic assholes thought, in the medium of meme.
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This isn’t really a Prometheus review. By now you’ve most likely seen the movie, read reviews, or heard about it from your boys. This article is a rant with plenty of spoilers.
Does anyone honestly expect greatness from Sir Ridley Scott anymore? There’s no doubt he’s still a master craftsman who can create some truly stunning visuals. But for a while now he’s been more concerned with those visuals than with minor annoyances like story and characters. That’s why for his prequel to Alien Scott was cool working off of a script originally written by the guy who wrote The Darkest Hour (remember that one?), that was later touched up by Damon Lindelof. We all know Lindelof from Lost, which we still argue about, but that’s only because we still love it so much.