Sony Working On Their Own ‘Kinect’ According To Patent Filing.

An uncovered patent has revealed something that shouldn’t surprise you: Sony is working on their own iteration of Microsoft’s console-pushing Kinect.

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Kinect Hack Turns You Into Rampaging Hulk; Sensor Smash Or Something.

Some good lads have gone and built a Kinect ‘Hulk’ mod. They did so by hooking up “Flash running w/ Molehill (hardware acceleration) up to the Kinect and Box2d.” That means absolutely nothing to me though. I just know it tints then green and lets them smash generated buildings and shit.

As dope as it is, I think Owen Good has it right when he describes it as more of a call back to old school Rampage than Mr. Banner. Still though, dope.

Hit the jump for the video.

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Prof. Uses Kinect To Aid In $4 Mil. Research Into Mental Disorders.

Goddamn, Kinect is fucking everywhere. I love how it’s been co-opted by countless people with unique ideas that have nothing to do with kicking an invisible volleyball. I change my mind, Kinect doesn’t suck. It’s actually fucking awesome. Latest example? It’s been used to cut down the cost of research into childhood mental disorders.

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Microsoft Hiring People To Work On Next Console; 720 Get!

Say what you will about all the motion bullshit gadgetry that has been birthed out of the bleeding anus where gaming ingenuity used to be. It’s prolonged the generation. That kids, is a fucking good thing. However, everything comes to an end. This generation’s cycle is no exception, and Microsoft has begun hiring engineers to work on their next Box.

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Kinect Hacked To Create Superman VR Simulator. A Man Can Fly!

Throw a fucking rock! If you don’t hit your nana, a small child, an animal, or a building, you’ll probably hit a fucking Kinect hack. They’re like, totally blasé  at this point. Not this one though. Three dudes at the University of Amsterdam got together and hacked the Kinect to make a fucking Superman VR simulator. Hell yeah. That’s right. The dudes with fucking stunning names – Daniel Karavolos, Sicco van Sas, and Maarten van der Velden – just upped the game.

You throw on some fucking goggles, and control Superman with your body gestures. Tapping the VR goggles in according spots will trigger Heat Vision and Frost Breath. It’s dope as fuck.

Hit the jump to check it out in motion.

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Kinect Hack Helps Perform Surgery. Awesome.

Welcome to the fucking future. When the Kinect came out, I blathered on and on about how its most amazing features would be found outside of traditional use. Once the drivers for the Kinect were out in the open, talented people began finding genius ways to implement the device. Beyond, you know, air kicking a virtual soccer ball. However, call me short-sighted cause I didn’t forsee this: the Kinect could be used to aid in the performing of surgery.

Fucking awesome.

Surgical robots are super-precise, but Mike Fahey at Kotaku points out that the “problem with surgical robots is that while they allow for extreme precision, there is no tactile sensation for the doctor operating the tiny robotic arms. If a scalpel brushes against an exposed vein, for instance, the robot operator does not feel the subtle bump.”

That’s not the best thing in the world. Knick an artery, have no clue, and Steve McHaplessvictim slowly bleeds out.

What’s the answer to this? Force feedback. This is where the Kinect comes in:

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Kinect Causes The Red Ring of Death! It Is The Devil!

Goddamn that fucking Kinect! I knew it was the Devil. El Diablo! It wants to corrupt us! Sure it has us petting animals and playing volleyball, now. But in the future? Once the indoctrination is complete, it’ll have us stabbing our grandparents and bathing in the blood of purified newborns!

Don’t believe me? Here’s some more proof. It causes the dreaded Red Ring of Death. Maybe! Sensationalism? Sure.

According to the BBC, a nice, untainted British family bought a Kinect. And then their console died. Could this be coincidence? Absolutely not! Wink. According to 10 year-old Adam Winnifrith,  “We plugged it in the day we got it but only played it a few times before we got the red lights. The next day when we tried it again we still had the red rings of death and haven’t been able to use it since.”

See! What more proof do you need? Fuck Kinect! It’s encouraging Big Brother. It’s going to result in robotic spy planes of death, and if that isn’t bad enough: it’ll kill your fucking Xbox 360.


Kinect Hack Allows You To Rub Virtual Boobs, Butts & Achieve Full Perv Status. [Video.]

Well, it was only a matter of time. Sex game company ThriXXX has finally done the perv world a solid and hacked Kinect. They didn’t just hack it for fun, no sir. They hacked it to create a virtual interface for rubbing boobs, butts, and down the road: a lot more.

They want to add full-body support and voice commands.

I gotta level with you guys. I’m a goddamn pervert, and even I find this shit uncomfortable. There’s something about menacingly rubbing some virtual chick’s bits as she stares emptily at you that creeps me the fuck out. Though, I’m sure, this will only turn (a lot of ) people on moreso.

Hit the jump for this beauty (?) in motion.

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Use Kinect To Control A Robot! Proxy Robot Geek Wars Are Imminent.

So, despite my distaste for Kinect, I continue to chronicle the odd shit that the device is being co-opted to do. We’ve got lightsabers, and now we’ve got it being used to remotely control a robot. Oh good lord! Haven’t we all learned from Terminator? Next thing we know, this son of a bitch is going to go sentient, and then begin using the Kinect webcam to cyber robosex other mechanical non-organic beings.

It’s happening!

But no, seriously. Hit the jump to see Kinect as a means to remotely control a robot.

The apocalypse marches forward.

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Dude Hacks Kinect To Create Realtime Lightsaber On A PC. 100x Cooler Than Kinect On Xbox

This is the sort of dorky, bonerfying bullshit that makes me want a Kinect. The ability to act like an asshole, and total techno-wankery. I stipulated in the past that geeks hacking the Kinect are going to pull off some impractical, useless, but cool things. Case in point baby! Case. In. Point. As many have said, now we can all act like Lightsaber Kid in the glory of our own home. A real time tracking and rendering lightsaber on your computer monitor.

Dorky. Cool. Useless. Wankery. Well done.

Hit the jump for video.

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