#September2017

‘Red Sparrow’ Trailer: Jennifer Lawrence goes full Black Widow movie before Marvel goes Black Widow movie

Jennifer Lawrence in a female spy flick, looking like it’s doing the Black Widow movie before Marvel did like a Black Widow movie. I’m fucking in, dude.

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‘Mother!’ Trailer: Seeing Is Believing In Aronofsky’s Next Film

NGL, not gonna lie, as the kids say (they don’t say this any longer, if they ever did, it’s me, old white guy, ruining phrases). I didn’t watch this mother! trailer. I’m already sold as fuck on Aronofsky’s next film. But, if you need some persuasion, check this motherfucker out. That may or may not be a pun, as I said, I didn’t watch this trailer.

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Jennifer Lawrence starring in Adam McKay’s movie based on dumpster fire start-up Theranos

cool

I know a lot about Elizabeth Holmes and her bullshit start-up, Theranos. This is because my wife puts on biolifemedicalsomething conferences, and Theranos was simultaneously a rising star and a source of concern for members of that community, and her. Basically Holmes was a scam artist who flouted FDA something suches, and most importantly: refused to speak at a keynote for my wife. Then Holmes’ career fell apart. Is this a coincidence? Is my wife at best, a realitymancer, and at worse, the Devil? I’m not sure. Maybe the new Lawrence/McKay movie will suss this out.

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Darren Aronofsky’s next movie stars Jennifer Lawrence and Javier Bardem

Darren Aronofsky

I was pretty goddamn high on Darren Aronofsky for a hot minute. Then he did Noah, after toiling away on it forever. And I was like “eh” and I was like “no thanks” and my brain was like “I guess I’m going to forget you for a bit” before it did just that. But now the director is gearing up for a new project, and I’m beginning to recall how much I fuck with his pre-Noah filmography.

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First Look: Apocalypse, Psylocke, Magneto and futzing Mohawk Storm from ‘X-Men: Apocalypse’

yes

Everyone’s bagging on Apocalypse in these X-Men: Apocalypse stills from Entertainment Weekly. Whatever — remember how fucking lame all the Days of Future Past promos looked? Rather, let’s keep it positive *and* talk about how fucking gnarly Storm looks.

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‘The Hunger Games: Mockingjay’ Trailer: The Girl On Fire Starts A Revolution

‘The Hunger Games: Mockingjay’ Trailer: Katniss rages against the machine

Catnip

Catnip Evergreen and Gail Force Wind are all up in this trailer for The Hungry Games: Mockingbird. Shooting down planes and shit. I’m down. I’m diggin’ it. Vibin’. Bein’ a choad.

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‘The Hunger Games: Mockingjay’ Trailer Teaser: Love Kills

Mockingjay

Here’s a teaser for the trailer which is in itself will be a teaser for Mockingjay. I find myself oddly excited for the next Hunger Games movie. Like, I won’t defend the books or the movies to the hilt by any means. But they’re a nice yearly distraction, and they fulfill my blunt-object social commentary/Dystopian fix for a minute or two.

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‘The Hunger Games: Mockingjay – Part 1’ Trailer: Katniss Furrows Bro, Fights.

Katniss!

Here’s the first trailer for The Hunger Games: Katniss Lawrence Leads A Rebellion – Mockingbird; Part I.

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Opinions Vary: Monsters of the Week Episodes F**king Rule

X-Files.

A couple of weeks ago I was yanking purple-tip to Almost Human’s premiere. It was jazzy, I was jazzed, my underoos were sticky but stern. (What does that even mean?) In the middle of my fluids-flinging, our own incalculably talented J-Hawtsauce pointed out that he had a hard time swallowing the episode orders that network television demanded. The good sir lamented the puffed-up nature that having to bring twenty-four (or so) episodes to bare every season can produce on a show.

At the time I claimed that I didn’t have a problem with what were essentially procedural television shows with a science-fiction tinge. After all, I love the X-FilesFringe titillates me, and since I’m lazy and don’t feel like thinking I’ll nominate Battlestar Galactica as (a stretch of) an example.

Monsters of the week episodes rule! (Sort of.)

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