Amazon’s ‘Lord of the Rings’ series is dropping September 2, 2022. Goddamn that’s a fucking wait!

amazon lord of the ring series september 2 2022

Amazon has dropped the release date for its Lord of the Rings series. That’s the good fucking news. However there is bad news, motherfuckers. The wait is more interminable than the series the show is based on. It ain’t arriving until September 2, 2022!

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Amazon is in talks to buy MGM for $9 billion. Bezos, Jeff Bezos!

amazon in talks to buy mgm

Amazon’s looking to stick its full shaft in the movies game, friends. The Titan has in negotiations to buy MGM for $9 billion and its acquisition would come with properties such as James Bond and The Hobbit. Not too fucking shabby, eh?

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Amazon is making a ‘Fallout’ TV series. Sick! It’s by the ‘Westworld’ creators. Fuck!

amazon fallout series westworld creators

Mixed bag of news here, friends. We’re getting a Fallout TV series on Amazon. Which is rad. But, it’s by the creators of Westworld. Which sucks.

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Amazon may launch cloud gaming service in 2020 with Twitch integration. Your move, shitty Stadia!

amazon cloud gaming service twitch

Google Stadia is a dumpster fire at the moment. Reports of devices overheating. People not getting their access codes. In other words, the perfect moment for Amazon to throw their hat in the ring. And, flexing by bringing Twitch to theirs.

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Amazon’s ‘Lord of the Rings’ series casts ‘Bandersnatch’ star Will Poulter as lead. Sure, okay, I have no opinion on this.

lord of the rings amazon will poulter

Amazon’s Lord of the Rings has cast Will Poulter as the lead. It is a series that I will absolutely not be watching. That said? The dude is a good actor.

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Amazon says its facial recognition systems can now detect fear. What a fantastic development for the police state!

amazon facial recognition fear

Amazon’s facial recognition systems can now detect fear! Hey! Wee! I can’t possibly imagine this shit being used for ill. I mean, right? *Infinitely sarcastic wink*

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Amazon announces their Prime Air drone could start 30-minute deliveries within months. Welcome to the ‘Black Mirror’ apocalypse!

If civilization is ending, which it seems it is these days, at least it’s going out as an episode of Black Mirror. Corporations not just ruining the seas, but also filling the air.

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The Russo Brothers sign with Amazon to develop some ambitious ‘global television franchise’ whatever the fuck that means

russo brothers amazon global television franchise

What we know: The Russo Brothers’ next project will be for Amazon, and it’s going to be a “global television franchise” apparently. What that means: who the fuck knows. But, it’s the Russo Brothers. They’ve been glossing my asshole (that’s a good thing, I promise) for more than a half-decade. So I’m fucking sold.

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‘The Expanse’ is going to be resurrected by Amazon. Bless the Sci-Fi Gods!

the expanse season 4 amazon

The Expanse, a show far too good for most viewers, and the fucking channel Syfy, was killed. Now, this glorious show is (probably) being given a new chance on Amazon. Here’s hoping it’s treated better its second time around.

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Amazon is adapting William Gibson’s novel ‘The Peripheral’ into a TV series so I should probably read it

amazon william gibson tv series the peripheral

Of course, of course Amazon is developing the only Willam Gibson novel I haven’t read into a TV series. But, maybe that’s a good thing for me. Maybe I should pass on reading this one, just this one, and take the adaptation as its own entity.

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