New ‘THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG’ TRAILER: Hobbits, Prophecies, Inept Wizards
Hey! Here’s a new trailer for The Hobbit: Peter Jackson Commits the Same Exact Sins as the Prequels. I oscillate between being very excited, and remembering how disappointing I found the first installment. (Which should have been the only installment, because it’s the fucking Hobbit, not Fan Service: Elves, Frodo, and Thirteen Hours of Filler.)
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Cosplay: CAMMY from ‘STREET FIGHTER’ goes green
Goes green? Eh, I don’t know. Yo. I’m trying to come up with headlines for cosplay. It’s arduous. And you ain’t even here to hear me blather. You’re here for the costumes and lovelies.
So just hit the jump.
‘METAL GEAR SOLID 5: GROUND ZEROES’ dropping in SPRING 2014.
When Kojima and his Espionage Cabal announced that Ground Zeroes was a prologue to MGS5: Phantom Pain, I didn’t realize they meant it literally. Ground Zeroes is dropping next year, by itself, for half the price of a new game.
HANS ZIMMER forms SUPERGROUP to SCORE ‘AMAZING SPIDER-MAN 2’
Hans Zimmer seems hesitant about scoring Batman vs. Superman vs. WB’s Anxious About Marketing Kal-El By Himself, but that doesn’t mean he’s out of the capes game. Dude is rolling up to Amazing Spider-Man 2 with a posse.
FIRST LOOK: Valve’s PROTOTYPE STEAM BOX
Here is a glimpse of Valve’s Steam Box. Often heard about in whispers, its name repeated somewhat erotically during a steamy shower, now we can see clear its corpus.
Monday Morning Commute: Ravioli Sauce & Used Diapers
…I can relate, man. Or how about fifteen slices of pizza on a Friday night? Or two pounds of Laffy Taffy while refreshing Tumblr for nine hours on a Saturday evening? None happened this previous weekend, all of happened at one point in my life. This isn’t about shaming, though. It’s about coming together as a bunch of flesh-sacks trying to make it on this Blue Marble. This isn’t about wallowing. It’s about embracing the absurdity, the rot, the excess, the loneliness, the glee, the victory, the defeat.
This is Monday Morning Commute.
‘EPISODE VII’ RUMOR: Chiwetel Ejiofor up for a role! Nice++
The uber talented star of 12 Years A Slave Chiwetel Ejiofor may turn out to be Force Sensitive. Or Han Solo’s dad. Who the fuck knows. What we do know is (we don’t know for certain) that the good sir may up for a role in Episode VII.
I’ll take it.
Cosplay: SILK SPECTRE brings that smooth Saturday
Here’s some Sally Jupiter up on your Sexy Saturday. Sometimes, amid my disdain for Snyder’s efforts, I forget how much I love Watchmen. Hell yeah.
‘STAR TREK 3’ may be directed by ‘ATTACK THE BLOCK’s JOE CORNISH
Joe Cornish! I thought you were going to provide me with the Snow Crash adaptation I’ve fantasized about in my bed. Late at night. But hey, what can you do. If you end up directing Star Trek 3, my chubby will be nearly the same. Cornish’s Attack the Block is fucking fantastic, and I think the good sir could inject some heart into the Trek after the shiny but deadened Into Darkness.
‘AGENTS OF SHIELD’ to have ‘THOR: THE DARK WORLD’ crossover episode. ‘CAUSE SYNERGY.
For me, this news is 66% fanboy fluids flinging and 33% oh God owned by Disney industry synergy nonsense. Ignore my protestations and know that the fanboy is winning.
