BioWare is going to be revealing their “next big game” at this year’s Spike VGA. However, it appears that teasing a teaser is the new black. You don’t just release a trailer anymore, no fucking sir. First, you have to release a teaser trailer for the teaser trailer. It happened with the Green Lantern trailer last week, and it’s happening now for this BioWare game.

Impressions? It isn’t Mass Effect 3, and that makes me sad. Sure, I lap up anything from BioWare like the pathetic lapdog I am. So whatever this new title is, if I’m correct in guessing it isn’t ME3, is going to be intergalactic stellar-time. Or maybe not intergalactic at all.

Hit the jump for the teaser trailer for the teaser trailer. Then hit the comments box with your thoughts on what it could be. Speculation? It’s fun.

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Today Bethesda announced the first round of Fallout: New Vegas DLC. The add-on, titled Dead Money is going to be hitting the 360 exclusively on December 21. Oh goody! Hopefully by then, the first comprehensive patch will be out for FNV that’ll actually turn the piece of software into a functioning game! Then this DLC will bring to us wasteland wanderers a whole new slew of glitches, game freezing bugs, and quirks.

I’m being bitter.

What’s actually in this DLC?

Kotaku:

The 800 Microsoft point pack has players working alongside three other captured wastelanders to recover the treasure of the Sierra Madre Casino. The download add-on includes new terrain, foes and choices, according to the Bethesda Softworks press release.

“We’re pleased to give fans a chance to expand their experience in Fallout: New Vegas this December with Dead Money,” said Pete Hines, VP of PR and Marketing for Bethesda Softworks. “The release of Dead Money illustrates our commitment to creating entertaining add-on content for players to enjoy in already massive games like Fallout: New Vegas.”

I’m going to buy it. Of course I’m going to buy it. If you’ve learned anything about me while browsing this website for an extended period of time, it should be two things. First, my love for Fallout transcends bugs and glitches and even mediocre side installments. Here’s looking at you, New Vegas! And secondly, I have no principles when compared to curiosity and more specifically to new installments of things I love. So while I feel I maybe should like, pretend to boycott this DLC because Obsidian released FNV with more glitches than can be counted, I can’t.

So I’m not even going to pretend.

A pantheon of Marvel Vs Capcom 3 news continues to come out. It’s sort of a fucking pain in the ass. All I want to do is walk around from my computer, and leave the blogging behind for a few moments. Naw son! More shit of interest to spit about. So yeah, Capcom today announced that Marvel Vs Capcom 3 shall be dropping ashore on February 15, 2011. A day after Valentine’s Day. Innit that perfect? Gives you just enough of a buffer to neglect your loved one!

But I spent all of yesterday with you! Oh wait, that shit was last week? Well then. Still, stop complaining!

Capcom also announced today the deals of the swanky fucking collector’s edition that’ll be dropping the same day as the title.

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I can no longer worry about whether or not Kinect is going to succeed. I can no longer worry about whether or not yet another console is going to be indoctrinated into gimmicky, motion control bullshit. I can no longer worry about whether or not the Xbox 360 can stuff all those grandparents and happy family advertisements down the fucking Sarlacc Pit they belong in, incinerating their insipid banality into a forgotten realm of bullshit.

Who gives a shit if it’s gimmicky bullshit? Who gives a shit if it’s clearly spying on you for Big Brother Microsoft Cola? No ones.

I should have known better. Kinect isn’t just selling, it’s selling like fucking hot cakes.

Reuters:

Microsoft Corp said on Monday it has sold more than 1 million of its new hands-free Kinect gaming systems in the first 10 days since launch, putting it on track to beat its target of 5 million sales by the end of the year.

Son of a fucking bitch. Oh well. What does it really mean in the long run? A lot more units solid for the Micro-softs, right? They’ve totally out Wii’d the Wii. No longer must you sling phallic device! Now you dance your way into stupidity with Grandma! Watch as she dances her dying tribal dance! Watch as Papa’s hearing aid falls out in the middle of a lovely game of The Biggest Loser: Ultimate Workout! and the family cat dies from choking on it.

As long as it doesn’t affect the actual like, games being produced, I’m fine. There can be mountains of bullshit titles out there featuring Kinect-based controls, as long as I get my legitimate installments. But with news that there’s a Gears of War-related Kinect announcement soon, I fear! I fear the infection is spreading.

The bunkers, we must climb into them. The hatches, we must latch.

You fucking assholes.

Marvel Vs Capcom 3 is going to be the perfect bonerstorm of fan service. Between the Capcom characters, and the Marvel characters, and the idea of staring at She-Hulk’s seemingly endless taut green buns, how are we going to fucking function? Insane!

Today brought us the reveals of She-Hulk and Zero. Goddamn, I need this game. So I can get schooled by a pack of douchebags who will assuredly make me hit myself.

Hit the Jump!, for the reveal videos.

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Someone call the fucking Thought Police, cause Kinect is staring at you, reporting you to Big Brother. Seriously, how fucking creepy is this?

Kotaku:

Speaking at an investor’s conference on Thursday, a Microsoft executive offered that Kinect not only knows how many are in the room when an ad’s shown, but what kind of team colors they might be wearing. Uh-oh.

How Orwellian is this shit? This sounds amazingly like the point in 1984 when everyone has to go through their morning exercise routines while the television prompter watched. Except now, they’ve merely tricked you into playing Dance Central Titty And Dong Shake Time. Yessir. It’s the same deal. They’re spying on you. But they wised up, and they’re not as obvious about it as they were in Orwell’s novel. They wised up, and drizzled their eerie spying in glitter and pom-poms!

Creepy shit! I mean, instead of being forced into this creepy Big Brother environment, we’re instead giving the keys to our souls willingly to giant corporations and marketing entities. But watch the fuck out next time you’re boning your hand in front of your Kinect! Kinect sees all. Kinect knows all. Kinect is selling your attributes to the highest bidder, so they can stream advertisements subliminally into your skull while you sleep at night. Laugh all you want, it’s fucking happening!

[Source: Renée Chio via Gamefreaks]

[For Sale At: theSKIDshop via Gamefreaks]

What a ridiculously gorgeous print for one of the prettiest, goosebumps-tingly-time games I’ve ever paid.

Looking for more reasons to hate Kinect? Well, how about that piece of shit that costs $150 only costs $56 to put together? Would that chap your ass? Ignite your asshole in rage?

Destructoid:

We all know Microsoft is selling Kinect at a tidy profit, but according to a recent report on the cost of parts, it borders on the obscene. The parts to put Kinect together cost roughly $56, meaning the $150 gadget is raking in quite a few pennies per sale.

“Basically, the strength of the design is the huge design win for the Israeli fabless company PrimeSense,” says  UBM TechInsights marketing manager  Allan Yogasingam. “They’ve provided the most innovative portion of the Kinect with their image processor, audio and video interface.”

I think the obvious caveat is that this son of a bitch cost a fucking shit ton in research and development. So although they may be able to slap this thing together relatively cheaply, there’s some serious money that went into creating it. I mean, fuck, the original prototype cost $30,000. Still though, you have to sit there and irrationally swear that they’re marking the piece of crap up a hundred dollars. Just ignore the other side of the argument and get pissed fanboys and fangirls. Pissed!

Theo Watson is a man with some impressive skills. Well, to me at least. I don’t know if he’s like, totally wizard or whatever to other geniuses. But to me? Dude is awesome. The good chap has hacked a Microsoft Kinect, and gotten it to run on a Mac OS. Barely a week after launch! Guffaw! I don’t know the practical applications of it up to this point, but I’m not sure there’s a practical application I can think of for Kinect, in any regard.

None the less, it’s pretty cool. And with this talented man opening up the Kinect to the Mac OS, I can only assume it’ll thusly open up possibility for other people to fuck around with.

Hit the jump for a video of it in motion.

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