#Video Games
‘FAR CRY 4’ plot synopsis leaked. But…who cares?
Don’t get me wrong. I’m fucking stoked and pumped and jacked like a proper bro for Far Cry 4. But the primary quality that had me swooning over its predecessor was the beauty of roaming the Island by myself. Encountering unscripted mayhem. The vomitcore story was ancillary, and thankfully easily ignored. But yeah, here’s the plot synopsis for Far Cry 4. ‘Cause it needs one, I guess.
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Report: YOUTUBE buyin’ TWITCH for $1 Billion Smackers
Good god damn! YouTube is acquiring Twitch, the popular-as-fuck streaming gaming video watching service. Thing. Like, yeah. Where you watch the ass-lords try to be entertaining while playing World of Warcraft or inFamous: Second Son or whatever.
Rumor: REMASTERED ‘HALO’ COLLECTION dropping on XB1 THIS YEAR
HEY KIDS! Bummed out that Halo 5: Guardians of the Galaxy ain’t dropping until 2015? Me too! Are you also a consumerist whore like me, who will buy visually improved editions of games you already own? THEN I MAY HAVE A FUCKING SALVE FOR YOU.
‘HALO 5: GUARDIANS’ dropping on XB1 IN Fall 2015.
Looks like we’re all going to have wait until 2015 for that killer game for the XB1. (Unless you’re not down with Halo, in which case you probably don’t own an XB1 anyways.) Yup-yupyup-yupyupyup, the next installment in the franchise is dropping then.
‘FAR CRY 4’ dropping THIS NOVEMBER.
Fuck yeah! Far Cry 4 is coming this November. And while it’ll certainly lead to weight gain, neglect of my students, and dementia, I cannot wait for this fucking game.
Rockstar promising “NEXT-GEN RELEASE” this fiscal year. GTA V HD, INCOMING.
JUST LAST NIGHT, I was shooting the shit with my friend. Shirtless, covered in suds, panting and momentarily recuperating in my kiddie pool. “Man”, he said. Chest heaving. “I want a next-gen version of Grand Theft Auto V, I’d play that shit again in a heart beat.” I nodded. “I bet you we’re going to get it announced at E3” I said, as I rolled over burying my face in the Jell-O at the bottom of the pool. He smiled and clambered forth.
KINECT-FREE Xbox One coming in June. THE ROLLBACK CONTINUES.
YEAH, MICROSOFT! Roll that shit back! Is there anything left for Microsoft to double-back on at this point? Policy-wise? I don’t think so, and I think that’s fucking fantastic. I also don’t give a damn about the reasons (I imagine it’s monetary duh or something) behind their policies shift. Giving us what we want? Cool.
New ‘UNREAL TOURNAMENT’ is coming! Will be free! Developed with fans!
The gaming world is a weird one these days. Huge creators leaving their Triple A nests by the dozen. Virtual Reality headsets offering promises of glorious tentacle-gape (to me) and billion-person MMOs. A famous franchise like Unreal Tournament being revived. For free! As a fan collaboration.
‘DESTINY’ cost Activision $500 MILLI. HALF A F**KIN BILLION
Yeah, so. Like. Activision is-spending-will-spend-has-spent fucking $500 million on Destiny? Good luck with that, guys. Like, I’m buying the game. I know a lot of people who are buying the game. But recouping that sort of cheddar? Uhhh. Here’s looking at the long game, it seems.
Rad ZANGIEF ART drops the hammer. And sickle! puns!
Just about the best fucking Zangief art you’re ever going to see. Behold! It’s “The People’s Champion” by Marcellus Barnes.
