#August2013

‘DIVERGENT’ TRAILER: A HUNGER GAME BY ANY OTHER NAME

Divergent and shit.

Here is a trailer for Divergent, a flick starring The Girl From Descendants and based off of a YA novel. It pretty much looks like The Hunger Games, but it doesn’t star J-Law. Which means that I am roughly 3,000% less interested. Will I see it? Probably.

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Cosplay: WONDER WOMAN strikes a victory pose.

Wonder Woman.

Here is a pretty gnarly picture of Wonder Woman striking a pose in the culling plains. I actually don’t know if anybody was culled in this plains, but I mean. C’mon. Huge sword buried in the ground. An Amazonian princess. Makes sense to me.

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Monday Morning Commute: The Robots Are Comin’!

The Robots are coming.

Hello, friends! Be you long-time wards of the Spaceship, or recent innocent bystanders gobbled up by last weekend’s Fan Expo in Toronto. This column right here is Monday Morning Commute, a weekly installment where we blather about the various things we’re indulging in during a given week. A list of the ointments we shall be applying to the burn of Existence. Too overwrought? Too grandiose? Post a fucking list of the shit you are getting down with over the course of the next seven days.

Ah, better.

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BEN AFFLECK signed on for MULTIPLE FILMS as BATMAN; will help ‘CREATE’ his rendition.

Ben fucking Affleck.

In the completely unsurprising department: Benny Affleck has signed his life away for multiple flicks, agreeing to play The Cowl’d One until roughly 2032. That’s just part and parcel when it comes to joining a superhero franchise these days. Last time I checked, Chris Evans’ had leased away his sperm’s rights to play Steve Rogers should he suffer a sudden end.

There is more, though. Affleck has agreed to help create his rendition of the Batman.

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Press Start: Life of Crime

cashframes

My neon-lit, arcade childhood was a world where winners didn’t do drugs and the baddest kind of dudes were the ones that ended up rescuing the president. A generation of regular Snake Plisskens. Now, one of the most anticipated games of the entire generation looms on the horizon, but GTA V isn’t offering us the chance to be a hero, rather, it’s giving us the chance to be the criminal badass of our dreams. There’s no denying it: being a criminal is a shit-load of fun.

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New ‘THOR: THE DARK WORLD’ EMPIRE MAGAZINE IMAGES: MY MJOLNIR IS READY.

Ride the Lightning.

The newest Empire Magazine has something like thirty-three trillion new images from Thor: The Dark World. Marvel in the beauty of the Hammer-Wielding Beauty. Scoff at those who get to bask in his presence, knowing full well that you are much more deserving.

Or at the very least, hit the jump to check them out.

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TONY JAA from ‘ONG BAK’ joins ‘FAST & FURIOUS 7.’ F**K YES.

Tony Jaa.

Eat my ass, Expendables. Or actually — don’t. Your old man jaws will be far too unforgiving on my palatable backside. But anyways. That franchise has nothing on this rival “everyone you can fucking think of” cinematic experience. The latest addition? Tony Jaa has joined the cast of Fast & Furious 7, making him yet another dope addition to the sequel to this summer’s empirically superior movie.

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‘HOMELAND’ SEASON 3 TRAILER: SAUL WILL HAUNT BRODY’S ASS

Brody Time.

Read that headline as homoerotically as you wish. I know I will be. Here is another trailer for the third season of Homeland. Taking itself way too seriously. Just a bunch of sad people looking sad. No matter. It features The Beard preparing its search for that ginger-headed terrorist fuck.

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JEFF LEMIRE is helming the ‘JUSTICE LEAGUE OF CANADA.’ So rad.

Justice League of Canada.

Jeff Lemire is one of the premiere talents in the game right now, son. Right now! And I am scientifically certain that 99% of his talents are derived from sucking in the clean, deliciously melodious bursts of Canadian air. The aforementioned Lemire will be bringing his Canadian-powered prowess to the Justice League game next year. And he’s doing it right, by bringing the team up north with him.

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Kevin Feige reveals ‘GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY’ VILLIAN, as well as when it takes place.

They be Guardians and shit.

Confused? Not sure how the honey-suckled teats of Guardians of the Galaxy are going to fit into the warm maw of Marvel’s mouth? Kevin Feige got you, friends. He got you.

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