Busy day, haven’t been able to get around to these parts. I apologize a million times, and leave you with this as I rush off.
Yeah, total rip-off of the Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon premise for the article title. I can’t help it. That game has my tits a-twitter in ways that are normally relegated to the seedier portions of my tumblr dashboard. How are you doing this Monday? I am well, thank you for asking. Here on April the 8, it is going to climb to nearly sixty degrees in my neck of the Empire. That warmed clime is itself enough to make me smile. This is Monday Morning Commute, and herein are the things on my mind this week. Arts, farts, et cetera.
For your sake, I hope you never have to live life as I do – in the mindset of a crotchety old man.
Sometimes, when I’m especially tired or caffeine-deprived, I can’t help but see change as anything but a pain in the ass. I mean, if you’ve been frequenting Omega-Level regularly, you’ll have noticed a number of recent additions. I should be excited. Really. Instead, I find myself grumbling under my breath, waxing nostalgic for the glory days of OL that never existed.
I mean, why shouldn’t I be excited about all the advertisements on the site? Not only do I get to share my thoughts with the world, but I get to help hawk products such as Norwich University, Dragons of Atlantis, and eFax!
Get `em while they’re hot, suckahs!
Moreover, this site is now rife with all sorts of strange characters! There’re sneaks amongst us, vaginas sliding into the fold, and probably a couple of freaks fiendin’ for another teleportation rape-dream! It’s a veritable gathering!
Okay – time to take an Alka Seltzer and plow through this post.
Thissere’s the MONDAY MORNING COMMUTE! You don’t even have to be a cantankerous bastard like me to know that the workweek sucks. As such, I’m going to show you some of the bits of entertainment I’ll be using to survive until the weekend. Your task is to hit up the comments and show off the various ways you’ll be ignoring the overwhelming responsibilities of real life.
Pull your damn pants up and let’s do this!
Don Draper is constantly trying to turn that frown upside down these days. Shit has gotten real for the Totem of the American Dream on the show, and usually we just get to watch our heartthrob brood and make bad decisions. Our helplessness is about to be mitigated to an extent with this free video game, which allows us to help him get his shit together.
Hit the jump to check it out.
Are you like me, ready to gobble up anything Mad Men related? Then I got a poster for you! Not interested? No harm! No foul! Keep moseying.
Hit the jump to check it out.
[Is there a better way to celebrate the manger-birth of a superpowered messiah-baby than watching television? Hell no! Join Rendar Frankenstein as he navigates Spaceship OL through the Televised Days of Christmas!]
There is something to be said of the idea that human beings need excuses to party.
Think about it – holidays have been celebrated since the advent of the human species. While the pretenses and customs vary from tribe to tribe, most cultures have set aside days specifically for the purpose of cutting loose. Work is momentarily forfeited, and individuals are encouraged to engage in social events so that they can relax, enjoy the kinship of their peers, and contemplate concepts that transcend the corporeal.
It’s basically psychic catharsis.
Again, such is the necessity for relaxation that it has been prescribed by multitudes of societies. Anyone doubting this need only consider the confluence of December-holidays: pagans honor the winter solstice, Christians eagerly anticipate Christmas, Jewish folk rock Hanukkah, and of course the saturnalian Romans go bananas for Saturnalia. These holidays are different, for sure, but the common thread is that all celebrants look forward to shirking responsibilities and spending time with loved ones.
For many, the holiday season serves as the canvas upon which some of life’s most cherished memories are painted.
But what about those individuals who, for one reason or another, are without their families during the holidays? How would you feel if in the time between one Christmas and the next, you divorced your spouse and could no longer see your kids on a daily basis? What if you didn’t want to burden friends with your grievances? In what ways would this alter your attitude about the most wonderful time of the year?
If you’re Don Draper it means that you take a swig of booze, bang your secretary, and woefully declare, “I don’t hate Christmas, I just hate this Christmas.”
It feels like Mad Men has been off the air for fucking ever, thanks to arguments and slap-fights and contractual wrangling between series creator Matthew Weiner and AMC. The good news is that when the son of a bitch returns, it’ll be at a slightly extended running time.
I fucking hate the fact that contract disputes have robbed me from watching Mad Men this calendar year. However, at least we know progress on the motherfucker has resumed. And how! From out of I Wasn’t Expecting It field comes news that the most gorgeous person in the world, Jon Hamm, will be directing the premiere.