#April2021

Weekend Open Bar: Prepare for Kombat Tonight

It’s the Night of Night, my friends! Sitting here at 4pm, it’s a mere three hours until I finally get to see a new movie in the theaters. Thirteen months! Lost twenty-pounds (not good), gained twenty-pounds (about 5 pounds too many), grew a mustache, grew a beard, grew a mustache, and now I’m back to a beard. Since I’ve been in the theater last there’s been insurrections, elections, and a couple of Marvel television shows. It’s been a hell of a fucking ride, some bad, some good, the majority banal.

Anyways! That’s what is on the tip of my synaptic iceberg tonight! But there’s other shit popping off this weekend, and I want to share in all the revelry with you folks! Right here, at the Goddamn Open Bar!

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Monday Morning Commute: Finish Him! (Quarantine)

What a fucking year it’s been, friends. And I know for many, it sure as shit ain’t over yet. But this week marks two weeks since I’ve received my J&J vaccine. Or in other words, this dude is ready to tentatively, and carefully begin to renter society. I mean, to the extent that I ever existed in it, you know? As a hermit and all. How am I celebrating this emergence? Why, I’m celebrating by partaking in two of my favorite things in the world. Hitting the movies on Friday evening and going out to dinner on Saturday afternoon.

What a fucking year it’s been, friends. Yet we’re slowly emerging from the morass, and with it brings a surreal feeling. However, I must underscore how fucking instrumental my digital kinship with ya’ll has been in sustaining some sort of sanity for the past thirteen months. Without these weekly columns, twice-weekly Twitch streams, and now Discord, I would have broken long ago.

If I kick the bucket anytime soon, I’ll lay content in knowing I helped facilitate the creation of some sort of small but meaningful refuge for a few people during this darkest of years. That said, it wouldn’t have been shit without the participation of all of you. So thank you so much for helping a brother out, and if I made you laugh a couple times talking about sniffing panties, boobs, or swearing at¬†Dead Cells, I’m glad.

Anyways, this is Monday Morning Commute! I’ll share my own hopes, dreams, hypes, and vices for the week! Then you’ll hit the comments section and tag-in, it’s your goddamn imperative.

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Weekend Open Bar: Nobody’s Home. Let’s Party!

Can I open the bar in five minutes? Can I go from absolutely no image, to an image, a post title, body text, and hit publish? Let’s see! It’s 6:34. How are you fuckers doing? Are you ready to celebrate the weekend? With me? I fucking hope you are! So come one, and come all, to the Weekend Open Bar!

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Monday Morning Commute: Coming Alive

What’s up, friends? I must admit I created the column’s title and image above yesterday, when I was feeling decidedly¬†much better. Today? On Tuesday? I don’t know man, I’m fucking tired. Slept like shit. Sam’s been waiting for a call regarding her potential job, so the entire house is feeling them stressed vibes. Teaching? A fucking grind!

But it ain’t all shitty, you know? The Super Covid Serum continues to work in my meat-bag, and I’m looking forward to passing the the two-week mark next week. Then I will be invincible! Capable of downloading 5G directly into my brain, scaling the tallest buildings, and communing with my God-Emperor, Bill Gates!

Anyways, I’m sorry I’m complaining! Let’s hang the fuck out, fellas! Fellas of any gender! Species! This is Monday Morning Commute! Per the column’s ontological imperative, I’m about to give a rundown of what I’m digging this week! Then you’re gonna join me in the comments section.

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