Remember last week when Previews teased the OMFG DEATH OF SPIDER-MAN last week? Well, new details have begun to trickle out about it. For starters, the son of a bitch takes place in the Ultimate universe. Which is a good thing, since while I snag a few titles from over in their alternate reality, it doesn’t excite me like it used to. Also, the entire endeavor is being overseen by Brian Marvel Bendis and Mark Swear Words Are Awesome! Millar. The storyline kicks off in February in Ultimate Spidey #153, then follows through into Ultimate Avengers vs. New Ultimates #1 (groan), while continuing through both titles during the month.

Five years ago, this would have excited me to pieces. Now I’m just weary. Good thing for me, both Brian Michael Bendis and Mark Millar are annoyingly hyperbolic as ever.

Comics Alliance:

“This is the biggest, boldest thing we’ve attempted in the ten years since we kicked this line off,” said Millar. “This is the one thing that could be bigger than the CREATION of the Ultimate line and it’s great to be a part of it. Being part of something like this is a once in a lifetime opportunity and soon you’ll all get to read the story we’ve written for you, This should be up there with the very small number of events that really mattered. This is going to be big.”

I don’t expect him to not be completely excited. Especially since it’s Mark Millar, and he super-hypes everything. So why wouldn’t he hype the hell out of this? But it’s hard to get super jazzed about anything predicated around THE DEATH OF CHARACTER X. At least for me. Right?

Are you like me? Still not jazzed? Brian Michael Bendis up in your house!

Comics Alliance:

“As a group and as individuals we have made a conscious effort to create stories this year that no one has ever seen before… I am very, very proud to be a part of this storyline and very proud of Marvel for even attempting such a bold endeavor. Sit back and watch as we unveil a storyline unlike any other!!”

A storyline like any other? Oh, you mean a status-quo destroying storyline that features the death of a character? Jesus Christ, that’s new and exciting. I’m being a bitter dick. I know I am. Underneath it all, with two big names behind it, I am going to check it out of of nothing other than curiosity.

Also, although I only really enjoy Bendis’ for his work on Scarlet at the moment, and I checked out of Mark Millar’s retarded adolescent fantasies when he decided to have one gay character of his involuntarily rape his own sister (no, I’m serious, that’s from the piece of refuse that is Nemesis), at one point in my life they were two of my favorite writers. So when Bendis isn’t stretched completely thin, and Mark Millar isn’t devolving into a shock jock bullshit satire of himself, I love the two of them.

So I guess I’m excited?

Thoughts?

What a fucking confluence of awesome is coming together in Hollywood. As we speak. Or maybe, it happened a couple of hours ago. But somehow, something out of a nerd wet dream has occurred. Motherfucking Guillermo Del Toro of Hellboy and Pan’s Labryninth and of course fucking Blade 2 fame is teaming up with David Eick, the executive producer of my eternal television orgasm Battlestar Galactica to create a new live-action television show based on the Hulk.

Fuck yes to the fuck yes! It was rumored a couple of months ago, and now this son of a bitch is confirmed.

Deadline:

Details of the premise are sketchy but I hear that the series will follow an origin story. In it, physicist Bruce Banner, whose alter ego is the green and raging Hulk, will be in his mid-twenties, less reactive and more energized as the world is still his oyster. Unlike the two Hulk movies, in which the monster was a pure CGI creation, the series will employ a mixture of prosthetics, puppetry and CGI. Del Toro and Eick will break the story for the pilot script together, sharing story and created by credit. Eick will write the script, with del Toro attached to direct subject to his availability. Del Toro will also oversee the designing of the Hulk character, which is expected to draw on previous comic book incarnations, as well as the original 1978-82 Incredible Hulk TV series, with a few wild tweaks on the old look.

I find this wildly arousing. Del Toro is a straight-up panic attack excitement guru in my world, and Eick has guided one of my favorite franchises ever. It’s particularly exciting, given the fact that they’re going to take a prosthetic approach to some of the Hulk, and if there’s one thing Del Toro can imagine, it’s fucking monsters. I’ve always secretly jerked off to the notion that his eye for creatures could be directed towards some sort of Star Wars flick, but fuck it, I’ll settle for this.

Thoughts? Impressions? Hit the comments box with your take.

Oh god dammit. February solicitations in Previews have the teaser: Death of Spider-Man. I can’t wait for a big character in the DC and Marvel Universe living to become the New Black. Everyone will be shitting themselves, “Dude, I can’t believe they fucking let Steve Rogers live!, it was insane!” I’m tired of motherfuckers dying. Steve Rogers, Bruce Wayne, it looks like Matt Murdock and on and on. ‘Cause guess what! Them fucks come back! Every time. Now it’s Peter Parker’s turn to die. Yawn. Snore. Wake me up.

Prediction: I’m hoping that Marvel isn’t annoying enough to kill off Parker. They’re just going to have to resurrect him prior to his movie coming out. So instead, they’ll probably and maybe, and sort of go with the equally annoying metaphorical death. Parker may give up the costume again. For the zillionth time. Of course. He’ll get all emo and decide he wants to tour Haiti or something and help with the cholera outbreak. Or maybe, it’s just a bullshit teaser and nothing will come of it.

Conclusion: I’m pretty sure whatever they decide, it’ll be stupid. Overblown. Hype.

Thoughts? Impressions? Equally resigned laments as myself? Hit the comments box.

Slashfilm has posted a shit load of pictures from the upcoming Captain America movie. These latest puppies showcase Hydra tanks from the battle of Something Something Top Secret during the second World War. Get ready comic book geeks! I instruct you to do your job and inspect these pictures. Comb the tanks for inaccuracies, and then post about them at Ain’t It Cool! It’s your duty. But you already knew that, you assholes.

Hit the jump for the pictures.

Read the rest of this entry »

Oh good! I’ve been eagerly anticipating who is going to play the preachy annoying ass old Uncle and the fucking useless save for emo-kid pep talks Aunt in the Spider-Man reboot being directed by Marc Webb. Well, now I have to wait no longer! Apparently both roles have been cast.

io9:

Martin Sheen, who I would certainly consider one of Hollywood’s most avuncular actors, has reportedly been cast as the new Uncle Ben in Marc Webb’s reboot. It’s unclear whether he will appear in the main narrative, which would suggest the story is retelling Spider-Man’s origins from the beginning, or whether he will (probably more likely) just appear in flashbacks. Either way, this fits well with earlier reports that the filmmakers were casting a child Peter Parker, which definitely would involve scenes when Uncle Ben was alive. Also, another report says Sally Field is in talks to play Aunt May.

Thoughts? I don’t really care either way. Casting that neither offends, nor amazes.

And on a final note, may I just say fuck Uncle Ben. Dude is always preaching about responsibility and shit, but he didn’t even take out a life insurance policy on himself. Then his dumb ass gets shot because he won’t give up his rickety piece of shit car, and leaves his disgustingly old wife behind to tend to his socially retarded but brilliant nephew. He needs to get off his soap box, but that’s just my opinion.

[Source Loïc Zimmermann via Gamefreaks]

These Captain America scans from the latest Entertainment Weekly came out today as I was literally walking out the door to school. A quick check of my Twitter feed saw their appearance, but I was forced to be all responsible and go to school and such. Fucking shit. Now that they’ve been around for eight hours, they’re roughly nine-zillion years old in internet time, and you’ve seen them a million times.

Sry, sry, yo! But if you haven’t seen them, hit the jump.

Read the rest of this entry »

When Disney bought Marvel, we knew there could be some dope repercussions. Last week, it was seeing the NBA get Marvel-inspired artwork to promote the upcoming season. This week? This week we’re seeing Marvel comic books get Tron-based variant covers to promote the big Disney movie in December. Shit is hot! Nothing like taking your favorite Marvel characters, and fetishsizing them with latex and 8-Bit retroglory. Hit the jump for the covers.

Read the rest of this entry »

How about a look at the SHIELD Helicarrier from the upcoming Avengers’ flick? Sold? Of course you are. If you’re reading this website you’re either horribly lost, or a nerd. Or, depending on what you were typing into a search box that let you to this den of depraved and debauched acts, both. These designs are by George Hull, and are being directed into your gray matter courtesy of io9.

What do you think of the look? I like the turbines that that use in the comic books, but I can learn to love this take on the classic flying bastard.

Well, I wasn’t expecting this. Despite covering the announcement of Marvel television with Jeph Loeb helming it, I had sort of forgotten entirely about its existence. I was reminded today like fucking woah when it came out that not only is the Hulk being prepped for a television series, but Del Toro himself is making a pitch for it.

slashfilm:

Deadline and The Live Feed have the news, announcing that Marvel and ABC are currently in very early stages of development of a live-action (most likely hour-long) series adaptation of the comic book character. The project is part of a push from Marvel to enter the TV realm, kicked off last summer with the launch of Marvel Television. Heroes exec producer Jeph Loeb is the head of the operation, and The Hulk was among two high priority projects they settled on.

Slash points out an obvious but good question: isn’t this just inviting confusion? Dude’s gone through a fucking ludicrous amount of iterations within the last ten years alone. First Eric Bana, then Edward Norton, and currently Mark Ruffalo in the movies. But now they’re tacking on a separate television universe? Aren’t the mouthbreathers going to get confused? Dur! Where is that there guy from the TV tube! Why aren’t he one of them Avengers!

Two different Hulks existing in two different mediums? I don’t know, it seems to be muddying the waters a bit. But there’s good news at least! Fucking David Eick of Battlestar Galactica and Guillermo Del Toro are pitching a take? That’s fucking fantastic. Almost too good to be true.