#June2014
E3 2014 MASTERPOST: CLOSE-OUT, ASS-OUT, VIDEOS & NEWS COMPENDIUM
OKAY FOLKS. Listen up. Between the alimony hearings, the drug use, the fact that Feedly went down for two fucking days, and my favorite butt plug melting in my dishwasher (which required an immediate journey to the upper mountains of the Appalachians to replace), there’s some E3 STUFF I DIDN’T GET TO. However, I also posted a fucking fuckload. Here in one batch is everything I’ve caught from E3. Posted, and previously unposted. Sorted by console. Don’t see your fave announcement/game? Hit the comments. I’ll add it. I know I’m missing a lot. Also! Use this space just to shoot the E3 shit. Read the rest of this entry »
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John Carmack left ID SOFTWARE because they were like “NOPE” to Oculus Rift development
John Carmack, the coding genius/nightmare behind Quake and Doom left id Software last year. While most thought it was because he wanted to roll much deeper with the Oculus Rift, there’s a bit more to the story. Specifically, he was all “let’s like partner the fuck up! with Oculus” and the parent company ZeniMax was like “naw, bruh.”
John Carmack developing OCULUS RIFT games. Meh?
John Carmack was a visionary back in the day. Doom. Quake. The engines for both. And for those wondrous developments he holds my eternal appreciation. However, I can’t really get up for anything he’s done in…fourteen years? So him developing the Oculus Rift is like announcing John Carpenter is making a new movie. Classic dude. Time has passed. Am I alone?
‘DOOM’ turns TWENTY YEARS OLD
Oh golly, these fucking bones. No wonder my asshole is leaking more than usual. The gray hairs are taking up serious residence on my dome-piece. I’m getting old. Not only am I aging like a motherfucker, but I’m getting reminders of my forthcoming senility too.
iD Software -cofounder JOHN CARMACK has RESIGNED. So it goes.
John Carmack is a beast. Created the engines that powered Doom, Quake, and countless other games. Dude is also sort of a douchebag. (Read Masters of Doom. Awesome book.) But whatever. The man who Really Hasn’t Made A Good Game In Eons has left the company he helped found. To work on the Oculus Rift.
And shit.
‘GAME OF THRONES’ SEASON 3 EXTENDED TRAILER: Death, Speeches, Gloom, Et Cetera.
Steel yourself for the third season of Game of Thrones, as George R.R. R. R. R. R. Martin continues to kill characters. He slays them from his computer chair, giggling to himself. He pauses only to feast upon the glut of tears he harvests from the crotches of his fans, and then returns to his act. Killing, slaying, forever. Forever.
The Dude’s High 5s: Top 5 Fictional Handheld Weapons I Want To Own [Video Game Edition]
Not only am I the Dude, but I’m also A dude. Like most males that are stuffed with testosterone and swagger like pirate god kings I love violence. Let me be a bit more specific, I like the idea of violence. I’d rather see it done in a movie or on a TV show in real life. Better yet, I’d rather be the one doing the violence in a video game. Today’s High 5 will look at the tools of the trade. These are the weapons I’d want to wield if I was about to run through the streets on an anger fueled GTA killing spree (Probably in Salem, MA … driving in that city is aggravating).
Video: History And Evolution of The BFG 9000
There are few things are gratifying as ripping off a blast from a BFG 9000 and watching demon douchebags scream in horror at their own vaporization. Here’s a video chronicling the evolution of this most glorious video game death machine.
DOOM and DOOM 2 No Longer Considered Porn In Germany!
I don’t understand the regulatory rules for many foreign countries. Well, most of them. I’m an American! My life stops at our shores! I do know that I find it odd that a country that cranks out scat porn like its going out of vogue (never!) somehow also groups a video game like DOOM in the same restrictive category as it.
Well, until now.
