‘Die Hard 6’ is happening, and it’s a prequel. Oh Dear.

New found ASTEROID *MAY* f**king HIT EARTH IN 2032

Doom is coming.

Sensational headlines! Will we be lucky enough to watch as humanity is blighted out by the rocky hand of the Cosmos? Maybe. Maybe not. But who fucking cares how possible it is, when writing about it gets the blood pumping! A fear boner! Carpe Diem! Let’s all the pizza we want, and dance in the streets with our genitals greeting the open winds! ‘

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‘A GOOD DAY TO DIE HARD’ Trailer #2: John McClane is old.

Something odd about seeing an obviously weary Bruce Willis with moobs running around in ridiculous action sequences. It’s like the older the dude has gotten, the more preposterous the circumstances have become. Obviously an indication of the arc of Hollywood since the franchise premiere, but I definitely prefer the quieter, less WOWIE moments in the Die Hard flicks. What do you folks think? Peep the trailer, drop your impressions.

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‘A GOOD DAY TO DIE HARD’ TEASER TRAILER: Oh Bruce Willis, you still got it.

The best way to describe Bruce Willis is that when he wants to do it, B-Willy can bring the charisma. Dude did it in Looper, and maybe I’m jumping the gun but I’m feeling his perma-schtick in this trailer as well. Now uh, do we know what this shit is rated?

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Video: Rian Johnson’s ‘LOOPER’ redone as 8 Bit video game. Time travel, amirite.

Looper hasn’t even come out yet (unfortunately), and it has already received a retrofitting. Ain’t nothing that says love from the geek community like taking an appreciated commodity and dipping it into an 8 bit well.

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NEW ‘LOOPER’ TRAILER: Bullets and Paradoxes For The Win

How good is this new trailer for Looper? It uses dubstep, and I don’t hate it. I’m serious.

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Longer Cut Of Rian Johnson’s ‘LOOPER’ To Be Released In China. Son Of A Gun.

One of the reasons that Rian Johnson’s Looper finally getting off the ground was that it got some additional Chinese financing. Now a perk of that financing its manifesting itself for Chinese audiences, and I’m like, mad jelly.

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Here’s the trailer for  G.I. Joe Retaliation.  Nothing gets me totally amped up for global spending on war and defense like a pack of gorgeous hard bodies making bloodshed and warfare seem so fucking sexy.

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Face of a Franchise: Gruber!

[face of a franchise presents two individuals that’ve fulfilled the same role. your task — choose the better of the two and defend your choice in the rancor pit that is the comments section]

John McClane is a goddamn bad-ass. From the late 1980s to the mid-1990s, McClane made a point to periodically run through a Die Hard flick in the hopes of averting disaster and making clever quips. Towers? Airports? An entire city? No matter the intended terror-target, McClane never shirked from responsibility, even if it meant working through a bombastic hangover.

However, part of what makes the Die Hard trilogy so fun is the fact that John McClane never has an easy go of his adventures. By the end of each movie, Bruce Willis looks more like a broken-spirited vagrant than any sort of wealthy restauranteur. The truth of the matter is that McClane is always outmatched by his enemies, and as such he has to get the piss beaten out of him before he can save the day.

So who of McClane’s foes are the most formidable? Which motherfuckers stick in the craw most? Well, the honor has to go to the Gruber Brothers.

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‘LOOPER’ TRAILER: This Movie Looks F**king Insane.

Here we go! Here we go, here we go, here we go! Official trailer for Looper, and god dammit it actually looks better  than my already anticipant ass was expecting.

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