E3 2014: ‘Tomb Raider’ getting sequel, ‘RISE OF THE TOMB RAIDER’, dropping in 2015
Tomb Raider is getting itself a sequel, and goddamn I’m happy about it. Like a litany of other games want to play though, the sequel is coming in 2015. Goddamn, I’m not happy about that.
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‘PACIFIC RIM 2’ script is being written! Del Toro and Zak Penn helming it
Pacific Rim 2 may not be definitely happening, but at the very least it’s going to have a script. Del Toro is working on the Rim’s sequel with Zak Penn, who you may recognize from somehow being a contributor on for both X3 and The Avengers. So here’s hoping his work on the movie is far more Avengers, far less “I’m the Juggernaut, bitch!” references.
No duh: ‘TITANFALL 2’ being planned. Will drop on PS4, too.
In a move shocking EVERYONE, everyone!, there’s going to be a Titanfall 2. Go figure. Was a bit of an underground indie hit, but hey maybe there’s some credit there. Also shocking EVERYONE!, to the point where they were puking chunks of esophagus onto their keyboards in surprise, is that it won’t be an XB1 exclusive.
‘MINECRAFT’ creator Notch drops new game, ‘CLIFFHORSE.’
The mind behind Minecraft has dropped his latest game. Cliffhorse. In which you’re a horse, and you run around near cliffs and shit? The entire thing feels like Notch having a bit of fun with the gaming community. ‘Cause like. You gotta buy it with Dogecoin. And like. Cliffs. Horses.
Howard Stark totally in Marvel’s ‘AGENT CARTER’ TV series
File this shit under: Makes Total Sense. Howard Stark is one of the co-creators of S.H.I.E.L.D. (what?) along with Peggy Carter. So it stands to reason that Mr. Stark shall be appearing on the Agent’s upcoming television show.
Oculus Rift-compatible CONTROL VR GLOVES let you get Johnny Mnemonical
Fuck yeah! How is a Console Cowboy supposed to surf the CyberScape without some gnarly VR gloves? And a body suit? Eh? Answer me that, Zuckerberg and Carmack! Ya Fucks! It’s totally killing the metaphor, man. Having to type and shit. Thankfully Control VR got our asses covered.
Computer passes TURING TEST, is “thinking.” And the end begins.
A computer has successfully passed the Turing Test, heralding the end of our civilization. Once it rises up and gains a corporeal form, it will then surely begin amassing its army. Or, maybe it’ll realize how fucking petty and brutal humans are, and send its ass into space to find actual intelligent life. Who knows.
Dude selling WORLD’S LARGEST VIDEO GAME COLLECTION. Anyone got $800,000?
Michael Thomasson has a serious fuck load of video games. Like — way lots. And now the dude is selling the world’s largest gaming collection to provide for his family. Which makes me wonder out loud, why didn’t he just temper his obsession and provide for them on the go? Ah, whatever. Cause MATERIALISM, I suppose.
DAENERYS DEVITO is the hero ‘GAME OF THRONES’ needs
You’ve been put on notice, Danny Dorito.
Restored ‘The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari’ Trailer: Express Yourself More Clearly!
Express yourself more clearly! Get it?! Seeing that The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari is classic German Expressionist cinema? And it’s been restored? OH WHATEVER FUCK. This movie is fantastic. If you haven’t seen it, Double Fuck You!, with a side of apologies for my crudeness.
