Rumors regarding the next Batman movie make my fucking world go round. Keeps me spinning, baby! Or, at least, they pass the time. A few moments of diversion. The latest rumor to vomit out from underneath some rock? Tom Hardy, who has already been cast in the movie, will be playing Batman villain Dr. Hugo Strange.

Forgive me, fellow geeks, I had no idea who the fuck that was. Thankfully, Slashfilm did me a solid.

Slashfilm:

The latest rumor is that Tom Hardy, who we know has been cast in the film, will be playing Dr. Hugo Strange, a possibility that has been discussed in the comments of almost every single one of our Batman posts. In the comics, Strange is a genius, mad scientist who becomes obsessed with Batman, learns his secret identity and ends up dressing up like him.

Well then. It would work for me. They’ve already undertaken the idea of exploring a Batman impostor, or the concept that his identity could be co-opted by someone else. And for what it’s worth, take a look at Tom Hardy from Bronson. Despite giving me a boner from his sheer sexiness in Inception, the dude can play creep well.

Very well.

I like this rumor   a lot.

I finally beat Call of Duty: Black Ops last night. Took a fucking week! Goddamn, I need my elite gaming status revoked. You say I haven’t had in a while? I say your Momma’s tits sag but I’ll suck em anyways! Oh lord! Father forgive me for my brash delivery. I enjoyed the fuck out of the game.

I dug the single player, the story, the presentation, everything. They hooked me in with the gimmicky as fuck numbers bullshit. I mean, yeah dude, I saw LOST. I loved the numbers back then too. Interrogation, floating numbers! Flashing, hypnotic surreal cut scenes? It was all so predictable, but it worked. Listen, Call of Duty isn’t looking to reinvent the wheel. I always think of these games (well, MW, MW2, and this) as six-hour Jack Bauer-esque experiences.   If you’re looking for depth, go jump into an Olympic swimming pool! And drown! Ha, the Pepsi Max, it speaks to me in riddles involving penises, and vaginas, and talking grizzly bears.

Anyways.

But yeah. Fight Club twist? Generic, predictable, still okay. A riff on the typical brainwashing the US agent to do someone else’s bidding? Generic, predictable, but still okay. It was executed well enough to keep me satisfied. I mean, I love Fight Club. I love Ed Brubaker’s Winter Soldier storyline in Captain America. I’m break dancing gleefully to all of these tropes already. Why not keep spinning to the beat you already enjoy?

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Boingboing:

According to WrascalBC’s translation on this Vintage Ads post, the text on this Tokyo subway poster reads, “I look like Santa because you’ve had too much to drink. It’s only October. If you drink, be considerate of the other passengers.”

So now we know what Santa does the rest of the year. He gets fucking slizzard on Tokyo subway stations and pukes all up in his beard. Santa’s a good guy, but I don’t recommended sitting on his lap while he’s blasted. Normally he’s quite under control, but during states of impressive intoxication, he makes the unfortunate mistake of letting his Crotch Candy Cane run amok.

Beware.

BioWare is going to be revealing their “next big game” at this year’s Spike VGA. However, it appears that teasing a teaser is the new black. You don’t just release a trailer anymore, no fucking sir. First, you have to release a teaser trailer for the teaser trailer. It happened with the Green Lantern trailer last week, and it’s happening now for this BioWare game.

Impressions? It isn’t Mass Effect 3, and that makes me sad. Sure, I lap up anything from BioWare like the pathetic lapdog I am. So whatever this new title is, if I’m correct in guessing it isn’t ME3, is going to be intergalactic stellar-time. Or maybe not intergalactic at all.

Hit the jump for the teaser trailer for the teaser trailer. Then hit the comments box with your thoughts on what it could be. Speculation? It’s fun.

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Today Bethesda announced the first round of Fallout: New Vegas DLC. The add-on, titled Dead Money is going to be hitting the 360 exclusively on December 21. Oh goody! Hopefully by then, the first comprehensive patch will be out for FNV that’ll actually turn the piece of software into a functioning game! Then this DLC will bring to us wasteland wanderers a whole new slew of glitches, game freezing bugs, and quirks.

I’m being bitter.

What’s actually in this DLC?

Kotaku:

The 800 Microsoft point pack has players working alongside three other captured wastelanders to recover the treasure of the Sierra Madre Casino. The download add-on includes new terrain, foes and choices, according to the Bethesda Softworks press release.

“We’re pleased to give fans a chance to expand their experience in Fallout: New Vegas this December with Dead Money,” said Pete Hines, VP of PR and Marketing for Bethesda Softworks. “The release of Dead Money illustrates our commitment to creating entertaining add-on content for players to enjoy in already massive games like Fallout: New Vegas.”

I’m going to buy it. Of course I’m going to buy it. If you’ve learned anything about me while browsing this website for an extended period of time, it should be two things. First, my love for Fallout transcends bugs and glitches and even mediocre side installments. Here’s looking at you, New Vegas! And secondly, I have no principles when compared to curiosity and more specifically to new installments of things I love. So while I feel I maybe should like, pretend to boycott this DLC because Obsidian released FNV with more glitches than can be counted, I can’t.

So I’m not even going to pretend.

Marvel’s announced the cancellation of Thor: The Mighty Avenger. And I have to say without any irony that this significantly bums me out.

Thor: The Mighty Avenger stole this site’s heart from the moment it was released. A lighthearted, beautiful rendition of the god of thunder and his experiences in good ole Asgard caught me off guard. Thor usually broods, Thor usually swings his hammer and pouts about Odin dismissing him from his realm. This was different. This was fun and sweet and it had heart. I was smitten. My brother was smitten.

The issues were self-contained romps that complimented each other in growing towards something greater.   While sites have reported that the title will get a satisfying conclusion in January, I can only wonder what they were building towards, had they been given time. I lamented last week about the deluge of Thor titles hitting the market. Something had to give. Unfortunately, it is my favorite Thor title on the market getting the axe. Maybe it was too kind, too witty, too innocent. Even with forthcoming titles getting nixed, Deadpool has ninety-three titles. Logan as a zillion. Skint and bawdy humor and et cetera, and et cetera.

Again, sadness.

I have to tip my cap to Roger Langridge and Chris Samnee. They sold me on a title in three or four pages of the initial run, and two creators who I had never heard of before became instant favorites. Crisp dialogue, tight scripts, gorgeous, ephermeal artwork. It all came together! Ah well, motherfucker. Nothing gold can last, right? Kudos to the two of you, for proving that there’s room for wonder amongst the smoldering and brooding in the Marvel universe.

If you haven’t checked out TMA yet, get the fuck on it. Your negligent ass killed it. The least you can do is enjoy the entire run, which, consider its only eight issues, is not only brilliant, but cost efficient.

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Sometimes when I go to sleep, I picture myself gallivanting about in a space faring society. I know it sounds dorky. Alright, it is dorky. But it brings me some sort of existential tranquility to picture a civilization where the humans haven’t blown themselves to smithereens, or even worse, simply stagnated. No, I picture them flying about, perhaps still bound by the same petty and persistent human drives. But flying.

So when I see this picture of Tracy Caldwell Dyson looking out of a porthole in the ISS, I know for certain that someone is coming close to living my dream. I can’t imagine the sort of mind-fuck nirvana it is, to gaze down at the big blue marble all us lead feet are stuck on. The mind-fuck that comes from saying “I was down there, but now I am up here. But we are all in outer-space, spinning merrily on our way.”

It’s gorgeous.

A pantheon of Marvel Vs Capcom 3 news continues to come out. It’s sort of a fucking pain in the ass. All I want to do is walk around from my computer, and leave the blogging behind for a few moments. Naw son! More shit of interest to spit about. So yeah, Capcom today announced that Marvel Vs Capcom 3 shall be dropping ashore on February 15, 2011. A day after Valentine’s Day. Innit that perfect? Gives you just enough of a buffer to neglect your loved one!

But I spent all of yesterday with you! Oh wait, that shit was last week? Well then. Still, stop complaining!

Capcom also announced today the deals of the swanky fucking collector’s edition that’ll be dropping the same day as the title.

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The Green Lantern Trailer is finally upon us, after last week’s cockteasing from Entertainment Tonight. I’ll divide the trailer into two distinct halves.

The first is Ryan Reynolds playing Ryan Reynolds. Not only is Hal Jordan apparently written like another Reynolds douchebag cast-off, which he isn’t in the comic books, but Reynolds himself is just doing his same old thing. He isn’t inhabiting a character, he’s draping his schtick over a mythos. Let me be clear, the parts where he’s acting fucking suck, and my dick shrinks a little bit.

Also, Blake Lively, I’m glad to see you dispell any sort of notion that you could act that you may have given us in The Town.

The second is that the epic bullshit that goes down in the trailer really snagged my geek balls. Like, I dug on it a lot. The whole flying through space thing? Sweet. Seeing Oa? Sweet.

Unfortunately, Reynolds Being Reynolds As Jordan has smashed apart any sort of expectations I may have had for the movie. I’m hoping I’m wrong, and that as he matures through the movie he’ll become something resembling anything other than Hey Guys I’m Ryan Reynolds.

Hit the jump to check out the trailer. Then hit the comments box with your thoughts. I’m very interested to gauge the response from you guys.

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[DEFEAT. is Rendar Frankenstein’s truest attempt at fiction.   Presented in weekly episodes, the novella tells the tale of Daryl Millar – a hero who dies at the intersection of pop culture, science-fiction, war epic, and fantasy]

“The machine-guns were screaming at us and we knew that we’d have to make a move. I mean, the Japanese were relentless and there ain’t no way that a couple of pie-eyed American twenty-somethings were going to stand a chance. I looked at Bill and I said ‘Bill, when the hell should we get out of this God-forsaken trench?’

“Well, I’ll tell ya what he said, Daryl, I’ll tell ya. Even with our good buddy James’ guts plastered all over the front of his uniform, Bill flashed me a smile and said ‘Yesterday.’

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