Documentaries! A powerful format of thinly veiled fiction constructed to invigiorate the mind! To alert people to beauties and problems across the world! To…to…to capture a behind the scenes look at  Masanobu Sato, the world’s masturbation champion. Pretty safe for work video after the jump.

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A match made in Heaven. Capcom and a drinking establishment. Wait, what?

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DC is doing itself something of a swag-heavy dance these days, trumping their magnificent sales. I’ll admit, I was sampling the cheddar popcorn they were selling. Not smackin’ lips on their claims? Marvel senior VP  Tom Brevoort. A man who launched an impressive volley of words.

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Oh, hello there friends. How is the Internet treating you today? Reblog that animated gif of the cat skulking quick on Tumblr and come back to me. I’ll wait. You here? Aiight, ballin’. This here is Press Start! It’s a gaming column turned Nonsense Collective where we chat about the week in gaming. Pour yourself a glass of your favorite drink – but Jesus Christ if you’re a friend of Bill W. don’t break your fucking sobriety this close to Christmas on my accord – and let’s chat the Light Polygonal. I list five things that caught my eye in gaming this week, and you retort with clearly superior choices. I’ll nod, praise you, and we’ll all leave happy.

Why Miles Davis? ‘Cause with swag that hard he goes where he wants.

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[Is there a better way to celebrate the manger-birth of a superpowered messiah-baby than watching television? Hell no! Join Rendar Frankenstein as he navigates Spaceship OL through the Televised Days of Christmas!]

If pop culture’s taught us anything about Christmas, it’s that it’s the season of redemption. This is the one time of the year during which even the most miserably misanthropic and criminally corrupt are susceptible to the suggestion that underneath their callused exteriors beat hearts of joy and peace and altruism. Even the most seemingly formidable of Yuletide foes have been felled by the most wonderful time of the year.

Ebeneezer Scrooge. The Grinch. Frank Cross.

If the very avatars of greed and contempt are knocked out by Kris Kringle’s right hook, what chance does a run-of-the-mill reprobate stand? Is Christmas magic only reserved for the worst examples of the human condition, or can it be sprinkled on those individuals residing in the darker grey shades of morality? What happens when a lifetime of misdirection is intercepted by holiday responsibility?

Well, when we take a look at the exchange between Santa Claus and the Tenth Avenue Kid it becomes clear that Christmas offers hope not just for sinners and saints, but antiheroes and unlikely champions as well.

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There are times when the blue-veined monster whispers nothing-sense to me. It coos at me, driving down my already dessiccated and marooned on the side of my consciousness sense of Rationality. It tells me to do things. From with the dank Dagobah that is my swampy set of boxer briefs, it commands me. Put in your credit card information. Click those buttons. Sign up for that porn site. Dance, monkey! Dance, dinky! Soon all shall be right with the world. Let the buxom shake, let the artificial moans wash over you. Spend your money, do it, do it!

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In what was a pretty obvious move, today Disney announced that they were wunder-converting The Avengers into stupendous 3D.  Whedon says don’t panic though, it isn’t going to be total balls.

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Go outside? Pah! I have Tetris and Wario Land to play! And god fucking knows, you can’t see shit in the sunlight.

Via. | By Andy Hunter

Fumito Ueda left Sony and everyone was all “OMFG, fuck what about The Last Guardian?!” Sony was all “Don’t worry, don’t worry, fools!” I believed them! I trusted them!  Now GameStop is saying the game is cancelled. Jesus Lord what’s going on?

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