#Video Games
Possible ‘MASS EFFECT 3’ concept art, featuring the Normandy and aliens.
This artwork by Robert Simons is either official Mass Effect 3 concept art, or absolutely fucking gorgeous fan art. What do you think, is this shit legit? It seems consistent with the concept art we’ve seen in the past, and it’s rather lovely.
Hit the jump for the gallery.
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‘Street Fighter 2’ Turns 20 Years Old. Good Lord.
It’s been brought to my attention that Street Fighter 2 turns fucking 20 years old this month. All of a sudden my receding hairline, graying follicles, and achy back make sense. I’m getting old as fuck. It feels like just yesterday I was begging enabling parents for quarters to play a few rounds of this son of a bitch at the movie theater. Or begging them to take me to the local arcade so dudes ten years older than me can take me to the woodshed in the game.
But I didn’t give a fuck, it was Street Fighter 2.
Zelda: Skyward Sword Gets A New Trailer; Wave That Phallus!
I keep forgetting that Skyward Sword exists. Amidst all the gritty, HGH-fueled bullshittery that I’m currently anticipating, it lurks in the background. A new trailer from GDC 11 has dropped, and I’ve consequently remembered how excited I am for this installment. Nothing like a magical romp through a familiar but modified universe to keep it nostalgic stylee. Despite all the Zelda games feeling somewhat derivative of one another, the gameplay is so finely honed, and the formula so delicious, I’ll happily slurp this shit up.
Hit the jump for the video.
Insane Amount of New Batman: Arkham City Images. Get Some.
This week, Warner Bros. Games launched a new website dedicated to covering all images, news, and other bullshit published. Within the hallowed halls of their corporate machinery is a fucking fuckload of new Arkham City images. Oh yeah. Concept art, propaganda posters, and gameplay screen shots like wowzers.
Hit the jump for the fucking motherload.
Ninja Gaiden 3 Teaser Is A Bloody Mess; Get It?
Team Ninja dropped a teaser for Ninja Gaiden 3 today, and it is as ridiculously violent as the series itself. Taken from a first person point of view, our boy Ryu hacks the viewer to death, replete with blood and guts ahoy. Color me excited.
Hit the jump for the video.
Domain Registrations Point Towards Grand Theft Auto V.
Hold the fuck on! There’s going to be another Grand Theft Auto? Why, I figured after the four games, the side-games, the episodic releases, and the portable titles or whatever, the series would have been wrapped up in a neat bow. Now you’re telling me that an obvious cash cow is going to get another installment? This, this startles me. So much for artistic integrity. What sort of proof are we looking at?
How about a bunch of domain registrations that are slathered in Rockstar’s typical satirical bite.
This Mass Effect 3 Fan Art Is Pro Mode.
Artist Patryk Olejniczak has rocked my tits with some ludicrously pretty Mass Effect art. The works, framed as promotional pieces for Mass Effect 3 are some of the best “fan” art I’ve seen for a game. Ever. Over at Kotaku, he’s quoted as saying his goal for these digital paintings was to “to make one of the best [pieces of] fan art (which would also work as promo or poster art) to be had”.
Well done.
Hit the jump for the gallery.
REVIEW: Bulletstorm
[Alright, so check it. This review is by The Faux Bot and originally written for Mad Gear Solid. When I realized that I wasn’t going to be able to finish the game in time, I asked him if he’d want to syndicate his shit. He said yes. Faux Bot is a genius, scholar, and friend of the site. He’s also funnier than me, and Mad Gear Solid is our spiritual twin from over on the other site of the pond. So go to fucking Mad Gear Solid, or die by a flaming sword draped in profanity and hate.]
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Here is a list of some words that make me think of Bulletstorm; squelch, slam, gush, firework, meat, erupt, anal, cavity, spurt, squish, rupture, forced, insertion, sack, giblets, cram, innards, gullet, crunch, drill, impale, tear, bore, flesh, sever, penetrate. These are but a few, however, they perfectly illustrate the amusing meta-game that I’ve created inside my juvenile mind. I like to re-arrange the words as you would with those amusing novelty fridge magnets —you know the kind- so that I can make deliciously witty and outrageous phrases that help me to decide on how to orchestrate my upcoming blood-bath.FORCIBLY INSERT ANAL DRILL and it’s done.
Nintendo Wii Getting A Swingers Game; ‘We Dare’. Game On!
BORED AS FUCK WITH YOUR LONGTERM COMMITMENT? DO YOU HAVE FRIENDS WHO WANT YOUR WIFE OR HUSBAND’S HOLES? You’re in lucky, plucky naughty people. Nintendo’s Wii is getting a motherfuckin’ thinly veiled orgy igniter in the form of the game “We Dare.” As they say in the Southwest Airlines commercials, “Grab your boobs and cocks, it’s on!”
Let’s look a bit more in-depth as this Sure To Be Marriage Destroyer.
Trailer For New Street Fighter Documentary Gets Me Tinglin’.
I know there’s a shitload of documentaries about video games and particularly about Street Fighter. I know there’s a shitload of amazing Street Fighter players out there, too many for me to recall. Is Mike Ross one of them? I don’t know the scene well enough to judge. I know the usual names like Justin Wong and others but I’m not sure where Ross stands.
Whatever the case, this trailer for the upcoming documentary FOCUS by Steve Hwang was fucking fantastic. The movie follows Ross for one summer as he tries and rock out in the professional Street Fighter scene. The trailer hits all the beats you need to make your tits hard. We’ve got man as underdog, man flounders, man perhaps triumphs. It’s what makes King of Kong so fucking good; the protagonist is talented, but you’re not sure if he’s good enough to claim the prize. Dramatic tension ensues! The trailer did good to highlight this deft narrative choice.
I can’t wait, this trailer got me stoked to catch this shit.
Hit the jump to check it out.
