#Movies
New ‘IRON MAN 3’ poster features Don Cheadle looking silly.
I love me some Don Cheadle, but I’m not feeling the dude in this poster. Not an indictment on him, the movie, or his character. Just him looking longingly into the distance.
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The Dude’s High 5s: Movie Couples
Valentine’s Day is right around the corner. That is if you consider midnight a corner. So today’s High 5 will deal with movie couples. The problem is, most movies that I watch and enjoy have very little to do with the courting process. So from my “Dude-Bro” point of view, these are the movie couples that I root for.
The Snow Is What You Make of It
Mother Nature is at it again here in New England. Though She can be a dependable source of sunshine and sustenance in many parts of the world, She tends to be fickle in my neck of the woods. One moment she is warm, hospitable; the next She is cold and treacherous–out to get you if you even try to go out. It’s all part of the plan, really. She likes to keep us on our toes, never allowing anyone to be too comfortable with how things are, and I like that about Mother Nature, honestly. I welcome this aura of irregularity because inconsistent states (be they nature-based or otherwise) can be conducive to creativity and productivity: you have to deal with all the contending elements, make the best of what’s at your disposal, and hopefully something interesting comes out of it. And when this great, big storm finally hits the ground and piles up all the snow and logistical problems that come with it, we can plow and pack and shape that snow into salutatory snowmen, serene snow angels, and epic snow forts. We can sled and ski our way to freedom in a winter wonderland. And if you choose to stay inside, you can finally do all those things that you’ve been meaning to accomplish (read that book everyone’s talking about, watch a classic movie, do some writing, etc.). Once the snow is given by good ol’ Mother Nature, it’s ours for the taking. So go ahead and make good on this, just like these fine examples of snowman fecundity.
Rumor: Warner Bros. wanted BEN AFFLECK to play Batman in ‘JUSTICE LEAGUE’ flick. No, just no.
Hayyy! I’m totally Team Ben Affleck Is Talented, and this news still makes my skin crawl. The Dark Lords that Be at Warner Bros. didn’t just want Ben Affleck to direct the Justice League flick. Oh no. They also wanted him to play Batman. You can be surprised at the miscasting, or you can remember that these fucking mongoloids thought Ryan Reynolds would be a great Green Lantern. The choice is yours.
STAR WARS – Episode Awesome: A Newer Hope!
It’s a spectacular time to be a Star Wars fan.
George Lucas, perhaps after being visited by some benevolent omnidimensional sojourner, has sold his most beloved franchise. The moment that fans realized Lucas was finally out of the picture, we began to dream. To wonder. To flirt with the idea that the piss-taste that’s been lurking in our mouths since 2005 may very well be washed away. New Star Wars films could be treated with the respect they deserve.
So, what’ve we been promised thus far? A new trilogy. Kasdan and Kinberg. J.J. Abrams. Cameos from members of the original cast. The interest of Hollywood’s finest actors and directors and other personnel. Spin-off, stand-alone movies.
In short, we finally have a newer hope.
Yesterday’s confirmation of the stand-alone flicks was the final nail in the coffin for my cautious optimism. I am now, for the first time in years, reveling in full-on nerdlust at the thought of new Star Wars. And while I have quite a bit of faith that a new trilogy could be beyond excellent, I’ve always loved the idea of free-standing movies taking place within the galaxy that Uncle George introduced back in `77!
Join me as I take a moment to geek-out about the prospect of new Star Wars movies! I’m going to fanboy my way through some of the premises I’d like to see materialize, no doubt getting so excited that my retainer spills onto the keyboard and my Diet Shasta bubbles over. After you check out my ideas, hit up the comments section and describe what you’d like to see during our next voyages to a galaxy far, far away…
Punch it, Chewie!
Rumor: Warner Bros. has scrapped the ‘JUSTICE LEAGUE’ script, not enough dance scenes.
I want some dance scenes in my Justice League movie. You know, just Barry Allen and Hal Jordan looking deep into one another’s eyes. Meanwhile, Bruce Wayne skulks in the corner, trying to simultaneously figure out how Jordan gets abs so taut, and also how to break all their bones with his martini glass. So I say “fuck you, and good riddance” to any script Warner Bros. cancels that doesn’t contain such dreams of mine.
‘AMAZING SPIDER-MAN 2’ director teases potential VENOM appearance.
Not only does Amazing Spider-Man 2 exist folks, it is currently filming. Weird as Hell, right? And if you think that is intriguing, buckle up. We may have ourselves some Venomy goodness in the sequel. Either that, or Marc Webb is a mad tip teaser.
CHRIS PRATT is starring in ‘GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY.’ I can dig it!
I love me some Chris Pratt, almost exclusively due to his performances in Parks & Rec. That said, he was good enough in Zero Dark Thirty, and apparently he is in Billy Beaner is Really Smartz. So him being cast as the lead in Guardians of the Galaxy is officially marks the moment where I begin getting excited for the flick.
Kristen Wiig confirmed for ‘ANCHORMAN: THE LEGEND CONTINUES.’ We all win.
Now that she is no longer plying her trade on the sinking ship that is SNL, Kristen Wiig can take her talents to greener fields. One of those zany fields will be in Anchorman 2: More, more, more Burgundy.
‘PACIFIC RIM’ early buzz is that it is monster-bashing bliss. I’m torqued.
Pacific Rim is the sort of movie that is trying to surf a very specific niche. Should it slide the fuck off the rail, it is going to bash its goddamn skull and bleed suck everywhere. Should it succeed? Way gnarls, bro. Early reports is that the movie is totally fantastic, and that has this dude doing cartwheels. (What did I just type?)
